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Trek Lit Limericks

A cunning Ferengi named Brunt
Rigged his ship with an EPS shunt.
He went back in time,
Committed a crime,
And returned a well-temporaled runt..
 
Drawled a south Texas gourmand named Losher,
"I don't care if this gagh isn't kosher.
Tho' it wriggles and squirms
Like them Regulan worms,
It goes great on barbecue fo'sure."
 
A tasty young R.N. named Chapel
Did amazing things with an apple

A half-Vulcan she did lust for
Fondled her bust more;
 
A tasty young R.N. named Chapel
Did amazing things with an apple
A half-Vulcan she did lust for
Fondled her bust more
And went back to his quarters to grapple

EDIT: Suppose I should start the next one...

A vedek while cleaning an Orb
 
A vedek while cleaning an Orb
Got some vibes he began to absorb
He turned and he twisted

his eyes glazed and misted
 
A vedek while cleaning an Orb
Got some vibes he began to absorb
He turned and he twisted
his eyes glazed and misted
And then he passed out in a forb.

(Of COURSE I had to google that. Words that rhyme with orb and absorb don't grow on every bush, ya know. The only fairly normal word I could think of was adsorb, not a very good rhyme. Forbs are, according to Wiki, herbaceous flowering plants that are not graminoids. And graminoids are grasses, sedges and rushes. So I worked for this one. I couldn't tell from my hasty Wiki perusal if forbs are bushes...but if they are, I guess a rhyme for orb grows on at least one bush.)
 
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A bumbling old mother Horta
Got a contract from a scheming Vorta
He asked her to dig
Up a very big
bulb. Was it big? Only sorta.

By the way, this one is for TGTheodore for the Geordi scheme

One day, Vice Admiral Nechayev
 
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One day, Vice-Admiral Nechayev
Said to Doctor Crusher, "So, hey, Bev,
Do I look sick to you?
Like I've got the flu?
 
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