TOS Caption Contest #98 - A Game Boy
- Thread starter Outpost4
- Start date
McCoy: "So, as you can see, you've got three weeks to live. Four, tops. Can I have that statue head you have in your quarters?"
Diamond Jim, furious: "You deliberately stopped me! I could have saved her! Do you know what you just did?"
Carl: "Bitch owed me money."
Charlene: "No, no, I won't play you. <turns to female> Last time I was here, he beat me at G'nip G'nop and I had to ... oblige him ..."
McCoy: "Postcard from Scotty?"
Kirk: "Yep. He says he wants to stay on vacation and do an engineering study on the Donkey Lady of Tijuana IV."
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Charlene: "No, I didn't just transfer here from the Obama. Why would you assume that?"
-- or --
Charlene: "Yeah, so in my first week here as Chief Engineer, the place got burned out and the dilithium crystals were stolen. So what? Big deal! I'm going to be on this ship for years and years to come ..."
Diamond Jim, furious: "You deliberately stopped me! I could have saved her! Do you know what you just did?"
Carl: "Bitch owed me money."
And this is why Shatmandu is a Caption Contest institution.
"You're probably assuming by my posture that I'm trying to hit on either one of you or both of you. That would be a logical assumption and maybe even a correct one at another time and place, but in reality I just threw my back out and I can't walk. Please help me, I'm in excruciating pain."
"Jim, you can Google 'hair restoration' all you want but from where I'm standing it's not even noticeable."
Redshirt: "Look, the way things are going, we're not going to be in this contest too long. How about we make things 'interesting,' if you know what I mean?"
McCoy: "Dammit, Jim, the colonists on Rigel VII need our help! This isn't the time to watch baseball!"
Kirk: "Shhhhhh, the All Star Game's in extra innings."
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Carl Spock: Don't worry, D.J., I'll protect you from this obviously deranged sex-maniac
Picard: Merde! All I want is a cup of tea! For some reason nobody will serve me... something about some silly dress code...
Red Shirt: Its the last remaining artefact from the Tetris wars on Earth.
Kirk; A request for more blinking lights?
McCoy; Yeah, I thought sick bay could do with some more.
Kirk: "I'm dying?"
McCoy: "Yep. Look at the bright side, you'll never get old and fat. You'll never agree to be killed off and then whine like a toddler when you're left out of a movie."
Kirk: "True, true."
Another glimpse from The Caption Contest Character Commissary (great idea, by the way):
Carl: "This dude creeps me out."
Diamond Jim: "Could be worse: could be the shouty guy from 300."
Carl: "Yeahhh, that's true; haven't seen him in a while. Or Balok puppet could be yelling out how much time we ..."
Balok Puppet, offscreen, behind counter: "YOU HAVE THREE MINUTES ... UNTIL I TAKE OFF THIS HAIRNET AND KICK YOUR ASSES!"
Charlene: "I told you I had just sold Sulu some roofies. But no, you went to his luau party anyway ..."
Crewman Dover: "I know, I know. I love poi!"
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At last the mystery of Ceti Alpha 6 destruction is revealed
McCoy: Is that a remote detonator?
Kirk: Must not press big red button, Must not press big red button
McCoy: Jim Jim?
Crewman: "I'd like to see you two playing Hungry Hungry Hippos ... on my marbles ..."
McCoy: "Isn't ITunes great?"
Kirk: "Why are the nacelle caps so bright?"
Crewman: "If you're looking for the Twister game, regulations forced them to move it ... to my quarters ..."