TOS Caption Contest #176: Par for the Course

[Jonas Grumby]

Chekov: "Meester Spock? Drugs are bad, m'kay?"

 

[Chrisisall]

CHEKOV: Are ve done sampling de plantlife Meester SpocK?

OMG, that's great!!!!

 

[Chrisisall]

CHRISTOPHER: I need a vakashun..

 

[jep]

Christopher: "But, but... how could she blow me off like that? I thought women liked men in uniform... were excited by them."

Kirk: "You're gonna be surprised by what excites women in the future."

Christopher: "It's dinner at a drive through and a fun night of bowling with friends, isn't it?"

Kirk: "Close, but no. Think... 'suicidally dangerous'. And 'bloody'."


.

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "Give it time. I'm sure she'll be replaced by the redhead from Alpha Protocol sooner or later."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Christopher: "Holy moly! I'd love to see what's under that skirt!"
Kirk: "Actually, no, you wouldn't. It's like a big pair of bloomers."

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "Don't get too attached to her. I'm transferring her to the Essex next week."

Christopher: "Why?"

Kirk: "Let's just say that a.) I have a lousy sense of timing and b.) I believe in charging in with shields down, if you know what I mean."

 

[Captain Crow]

Chekov: Meester Spock I need to go potty.

Spock: Mr. Chekov I told you to go before we left the ship.

 

[T'Girl]

Spock: "What is it Mr Chekov?"

Chekov: "Nothing Mr Spock, I just giving Landon some privacy."

~tinkle~tinkle~tinkle~tinkle~tinkle~tinkle~tinkle~tinkle~tinkle

Chekov: "I did not know girl could urinate while standing."

Spock: ***snicker snicker***

 

[ItsGreen]

Christopher: A woman!

Kirk: A crewman, If you nail her tomorrow, you'll forget her by yesterday!

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK: Don't get any ideas, Captain.

Believe me...I've tried. She's colder than a dead mackerel in a freezer unit.

 

[cooleddie74]

CHEKOV: Can someone please tell me if I'm holding dis tricorder correctly? Seriously...I'm pretty bad at dis.

 

[Rat Boy]

Chekov: "Wuck dis science crap. I tink I'll go into security de first chance I get."

 

[Admiral Shran]

Kirk: Don't bother, I hit it about a month ago, and two weeks ago, and last night. She's not that good.

Christopher: Oh, ok then.

Kirk: You know, I have a small bottle of Romulan Ale in my quarters. I wonder if she's busy tonight.

 

[Diesel Micky Dolenz]

Christopher: "No? But she looks so..."

Kirk: "Two words: 'axe wound'"

Chekov: "And not only is she a lying whore, but she's a lousy lay!"

Spock: "According to my tricorder, ensign, she's standing right behind you."

Chapel: "Sure, Tommy, we can spend the afternoon observing crew physicals again."

Tommy: "Nude jumping jacks FTW!"

 

[Captain Crow]

Christopher: Wowzers! I'd like to put my beef in her taco, if you know what I mean.

Kirk: She prefers Lady Fingers to beef.

 

[jep]

Kirk: "Before you get any wild ideas Captain, let me tell you a story that is quite appropriate. It's called 'The Hortas & The Hair'."



.

 

[jep]

Kirk: "Let's just say that she's a firm believer in "The Greener The Berry, The Sweeter The Vulcan"... or something like that."



.

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: We're a combined service Major.

NELSON: And that includes genies?

 

[T'Boggan]

Christopher: "Wow! Smokin...."

Kirk: " Well he's a nice lad but he gets a bit clingy and tearfull afterwards'"

Chekov: "She's in the Bushes you wulcan idiot, what next...looking for your ass with both hands?

Chapel: "Well, Tommy, wHow you ALL have Rodenberry for a Surname is a funny story!"