Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #545: Alien Ships

[LeadHead]

Hello and welcome to the new contest!

Apologies for last week getting away from me. The weekend was almost busier than the normal work week.

Anyway, let's go to Picard with the winners!

First up to the plate we have the "LeadHead tried not to get political here, but this was undeniably hilarious" Award, going to Nerys Myk for:

PICARD: There is still time to back out Melania.


Next, we have the "Fine Print" Award, going to Leviathan for:

Crusher: Glad you could make it, please make yourself at home, we aim to be good hosts.
Odan: Exxxxxcellllllent
Riker: Wait...what did we just agree to?


Next, we have the "Romantic Holograms" Award, going to Triskelion for:

Skeletor's Torso: KISS HER, YOU FOOL!!!


Next, we have the "Communication" Award, going to Smellincoffee for:

Data: Talk to the hand, because the face is not receiving auditory feedback.


Next, we have the "Efficient Problem Solving" Award, going to Bigglesworth for:

O'Brien: Shall I energize sir?
Riker: Stand fast chief. If Crusher moves forward six more inches we can get rid of two problems.


Our Photoshop Award, goes to tharpdevenport for:

The award goes to shivkala for:

Picard: Personal Log--She is my perfect mate and yet I must give her up. Kirk never had these problems!

3 KBL's this time!

First, Herbert:

Worf: I am going to bite you on the wrist now. This will initiate Klingon mating ritual.
K'ehleyr: Acknowledged. You may proceed


Next, JirinPanthosa:

PICARD: Picard to O'Brien. On my mark, initiate secret transporter duplication program Picard 4.


And inflatabledalek:

Worf: Who is your tailor? This material is fantastic...

Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners!

Our new contest will run from now until Monday, March 5th.

For this contest, we will spend some time aboard non starfleet craft...

Enjoy!

 

[LeadHead]

Picard: Dang, Chakotay gets to have the last laugh.

Worf: Tricorder readings do not identify any possible purpose for the large knobs on that console.

Sela: Only 4 likes on my photo at the valley of Chu'La? This is an outrage!

La Forge: Pay attention guys, by aiming tools like these at broken things, you can make your ship go.

Data was caught off guard when he discovered Tin Man's waste disposal systems.

 

[Nerys Myk]

SELA: Only four appearances? What about, Nemesis? That has Romulans in it.
MOVAR: Memory Alpha doesn't lie.
SELA: But I'm a fan favorite!

 

[shivkala]

Wesley: Sir, I think you should let me drive.

Picard: Shut, up, Wesley!

Wesley: But, sir, you've been going .5 lightspeed and have had your blinker on for the past 23 light years.

Worf: Just as I suspected. The tricoder is picking up green lighting. This is definitely an alien ship.

Sela: You actually took footage of my conception?

La Forge: Now this trick, I learned from watching The Doctor.

Data: Personal log--I am in the intestines of a living ship. I was lead to believe that this would be a job for Worf or O'Brien, as they are, to phrase it as Commander Riker did, the "butt monkeys" of this ship.

 

[Bry_Sinclair]

Wesley: What's that bright light, Captain?
Picard: Death, Wesley. I couldn't out-fly those asteroids in this hunk of junk, so now it's time for us to meet our maker.
Wesley: Just like the old gypsy woman said!

Riker: C'mon Worf, just one more quarter then I swear it's your shot!

Sub-Commander: Is that...?
Sela: Yes.
Sub-Commander: Did we...?
Sela: Yes.
Sub-Commander: You mean...
Sela: Yes. We just destroyed the transport carrying the Empire's last batch of hairdressers. It looks like we're stuck with this!

La Forge: Expelliarmus!

Second Officer's log, supplemental. Whilst exploring Tinman, mission specialist Elbrum and myself became separated. I have tracked his location and found the reason why this entity connected with him. Starfleet will have to rename it as Tinwoman and we will have to arrange a baby shower.

 

[Herbert]

Thanks for the win, Leadhead

Romulan Dude: Hurry up!
Sela: I'm going as fast as I can. It'll be up in a few seconds
Romulan Dude: I can't miss the latest episode of Keeping Up With The Cardassians.

 

[Herbert]

La Forge: Hey guys, are there any Pakled women on this ship?
Pakled: Yes. They also look for things that make them go
La Forge: You think I could make one of them go?
Pakled: No

 

[Triskelion]

T4TW Leadhead!

Picard: Sit down, Junior!
Baby Dirgo: I've evolved beyond a car seat DAD!

Worf: Looks like I'm not the only one who needs prune juice
Riker: YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVES PRUNE JUICE?? BEARS.
Worf: We get it, you're from Alaska, let it go.
Riker: Worf?
Worf: Yes?
Riker: On the Klingon ship IKS Pagh, we warriors had a saying: smile when you eat the gagh.
Worf: I take it back. Go back to the Alaska thing.
Riker: ......I thought so.

 

[Herbert]

Wesley: Hey, guess what? The database says that the NX-01 visited here once? I wonder if they left any evidence of their visit?

 

[Herbert]

Worf: According to the tricorder, you manipulate those knobs to fire her up.
Riker: Heh. I used that technique on Deanna once.
Worf: I'll have to remember that.
Riker: Okay everyone let's get to .........wait...what?

 

[Herbert]

Data prepares to belt out a show tune

 

[tharpdevenport]

Pakled in the Middle: "He is going to stick it in."

Pakled on the Right: "Hehehehehehe."

 

[Finn]

Captain’s Log: It worked. Geordi is brilliant for once. A gif of Spot playing Ode to Spot from “Step-Dad Data” to Sela is distracting the Romulans..

 

[Leviathan]

TFTW!

<booming voice> Fly into the light little redshirts...fly into the light....

 

[Leviathan]

Gomtuu: If you could just scratch that itch...right behind you...it's been driving me insane for millennia.

 

[Mojochi]

Dirgo's comment about only fancy starships having more than 2 seats came back to haunt him during the crash

Riker: Well if it's not Borg or Romulan, who the hell else would have all green lights?

Movar: Are these the Enterprise videos logs on your mother's death?

Sela: Yes.

Movar: Well, at least she didn't get slimed by it like that Commander Riker

Reginod: I hope his eye machine doesn't let him see when people are lying

Data: Now this ship knows how to do a red alert right.

 

[tharpdevenport]

Riker: "Sir, our sensors are useless inside this electromagnetic storm."

Picard: "Picard to Enterprise. Commander Troi, please use the Enterprise's sensors to guide our shuttle."

Troi: "Understood, but we'll need to take control of the shuttle's helm."

Picard: "Understood. Proceed."

Troi: "I'm taking control of the shuttle's helm now."

Picard: "Wait! NO!!!"

CRASH

 

[Nerys Myk]

PICARD: That music...like something out of a John Carpenter film.

 

[Qonundrum]

"Commander, the sign above the door reads "Commodore 64C."
"Yes Worf, I saw that. I hated that beige redesign. Blends into our ship's walls too easily. Give me an Atari Falcon any day. It has 5 different shades of gray-- check that, I hate shades of gray."

"Wow, Earth porn is like that?"
"Yes, but they say the same thing about our bowl cuts."

 

[tharpdevenport]

"I'm just saying: if you are a blonde, then why are your eyebrows brown?"

Sela: "Are you implying I dye my hair, subcommander?"

"No, no. But what about the carpet? Does it match the d--"

Sela: "If you finish that sentence you'll disappear in the middle of the night. Now, there will be no more taking about the color of the hair on the rest of my body."

"Yes, commander.
.....
So, is that brown hair on your head I see under the wig on your left?"