A PART FLIES OFF
Picard: "What was that?"
Yar: "Wooow -- did you see that?"
Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #522: The Grand FInale
- Thread starter LeadHead
- Start date
A PART FLIES OFF
Picard: "What was that?"
Yar: "Wooow -- did you see that?"
Riker: What's that, Chirpy? I know you miss Thomas but he asked me to take care of you.
Crusher: Oh good help has arrived.
Troi: Oh is that Chirpy? How is my favorite invisible space parrot today?
Crusher: OF COURSE
Lt. Yar: "Yes sir, I may be a woman but I know how to pilot a Shuttle; and I won't collide with the ship. Although I hear some Betazoid females are TERRIBLE pilots, so I would never have one at the Helm."
Data: Counselor Troi. Commander Riker inquired whether you had dropped a hundred years deceased targ in the restroom facility.
Riker: And that's why no one likes you you big mouthed tin twit.
Riker: "Boob Shelf!"
Troi: "Ohhh, you laugh now, but one day in the future I sware to God that I'll crash the ship so hard that your chair literally goes rolling out of place forwards and you flying out of it and hurt yourself/ I know, it seems impossible since you're chair is bolted down by futuristic 24th century materials, but I assure this will happen."
Picard: Is that Strauss?
Yar: Yes, sir.
Picard: Richard or Johann?
Yar: Johann, sir. Richard did the other music.
Picard: Ah, Johann. The son or the father?
Yar: I'm not sure, sir.
Picard: Wait, should this shuttle type be aboard in season 1?
Yar: Ask me later during the drinks in Ten Forward.
Picard: And at the front we have the three officers who have been chose for Continuity Inconsistencies! From left to right: What Rank Is He? Why Did She Stop Telepathically Talking To Riker? And, my favourite, Why Does His Forehead Keep Changing Shape!
Picard: When I return to the past I'm telling everyone about this future so we can save Troi! Though this means the Enterprise will be destroyed and you will die in a big explosion instead.
Q: No no no... You throw the fart in the other guy's face!
Riker: Alright, time to start our weekly stress releasing bitching about the Captain. I'm so glad we have this time alone without him to do that. Imagine if he ever turned up to one of these!
Oh, and thanks for the double win LH!
Made you look: Says Riker
Picard: Lt.? Was that an engineer floating out here that you just hit?
Yar: Absolutely not, Sir. Now, where's the button to clean gunk off the windshield again? Oh, here, got it!
Picard: ...to boldly go where...wait a minute! Did they just split an infinitive? Who wrote this crap? It should be to "go boldly." Let me just fix that on my copy. Okay, better! ...to go boldly where no one has gone before.
Picard: Yes! That sounded just like Barclay! Now do me, do me!
Crusher: Data, did you record all of our voices so you could imitate them?
Picard: Doctor, I am not doing anything your son hasn't done.
Q: Cheer up, Picard, First Contact is a decent movie. So what if the rest of them suck? Do you really think the quality of an eighth season would trump those four movies?
Riker: You lost fair and square, Beverly. Now take it off!
Crusher: "Invisible space crackers"?
Data: It is the recommended nutritional snack for Chirpy's species, Doctor.
Picard: Easy, Data. Chirpy's beak can rip through solid duratanium.
Crusher: And yet he still can't seem to whistle... fascinating.
Picard: Lieutenant, I understand you come from a failed colony... Turkana IV, wasn't it?
Yar: Yes, sir.
Picard: You're very fortunate to have escaped that. On this ship we are all enlightened people who have no need of money. You will learn to enjoy tea, goldfish, Shakespeare, and reading real books.
Yar: I look forward to it, sir. (wonders how soon it will be before she can request a transfer to a less stuck-up ship)
Every female crewmember wearing a skant: Captain, we're freezing. Request permission to turn down the air conditioning.
Picard: The temperature feels comfortable to me. Request denied.
Q: I have bad news, Jean-Luc. It's over between us. I've found a new Captain. Her name is Kathy Janeway, she's spirited, feisty, and I'm going to ask her to have my child. So don't take it personally, but you're simply no match for her.
Picard: (tries to keep his laughter muted, while thinking "Thank God.")
Riker: Stop pretending you're broke, Beverly. You have a charge account here, remember? That's how you bought the cloth on Farpoint Station. You don't think I'd have forgotten that, do you? Pay up!
Similar threads
- Locked
- Sticky
- Locked
