Troi: I could use a foot rub.
J'Dan: I CONFESS!!!
Troi: And you doubted my usefulness as an interrogator.
Riker: I CONFESS TOO!!!
Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #499: Klingons!
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Troi: I could use a foot rub.
J'Dan: I CONFESS!!!
Troi: And you doubted my usefulness as an interrogator.
Riker: I CONFESS TOO!!!
PICARD: I've come from the future to tell you that if you don't stop being assholes, Worf will murder you both.
DURAS: You PA'TAK! Just for that, I'm going to start killing people Worf loves!
GOWRON: And just for that, I'm going to stubbornly go against Worf even when he's obviously right!
PICARD: *sigh*, ****ing predestination paradoxes.
Picard: And, for the record, Gowron, I've been doing that for years. At this point, I think he likes it.
Korris' insistence that a "Faith of the Heart" sing-along was a traditional Klingon death ritual only intensified Worf's doubts about his new friends.
Gornophile Picard: That isn't a knife. Now that is a knife!
Thug: YOUR ACCENT IS WITHOUT HONOR!!!
Gowron: ``All right, they don't have the broccoli cheese soup. Is the tomato rice any good? Have you ever had the tomato rice?''
o/` Beelzebub has a devil put aside ---
For me ---
FOR MEEEEEE o/`
``I'm ... I'm an adorable little mousey? Squeak, squeak?''
Worf: ``Eighteen empty chairs in the room but no, you can't sit, Worf, you have a whole wall to lean against I guess.''
Klingon: ``That zit! Oh no!''
TROI: Let me see your best Klingon.
J'DAN: My what?
TROI: Klingon. The part is a Klingon. I want to know if you can pull it off.
J'DAN: I am a Klingon you stupid petaq! I should kill you where you stand!!!!
TROI: That was...yeah... we'll let you know. Leave your number at the desk.
J'DAN: Auditions are without honor.
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J'Dan: It was the chair.
Troi: I sense he's lying.
Worf: I must be empathic too, because I sense he ate rokeg burritos and cabbage.
Left Klingon: "He started it!"
Right Klingon: "Did not!"
Left Klingon: "Did too!"
Picard: "I hate this job."
Left Klingon: "So who do you like in this game?"
Right Klingon: "Well, let's see. That's a tough question. Bre'nak has the home court advantage, but Jakragh is coming off of a three game winning streak and somebody get these Humans out of our studio."
Picard: "What? No autograph?"
Picard: Winners delayed until tomorrow. But they will be posted!
Duras: This is an outrage!
Gowron: Delayed lists of winners are without honor!
K'ehleyr: I warned you they would not take this news well.
Picard: I hear any more whining and I'm sending you all to the Enterprise Forum Caption This contests!
Klingon Yorkshireman: Oooo used to dream of living in a ENT Caption Contest. Would have been a palace to us. We had to live in the Movies Contest.
Second Klingon Yorkshireman: Well of course we had it tough. We had two bits of cold dilithium, worked twenty-four hours a day at mill for sixpence every four years, and when we got home our Dad would slice us in two with a batleth.
Third Klingon Yorkshireman: Right. (pause) I had to get up to disembowel my enemies, half an hour before I went to bed, eat a lump of dead gagh, AND pay my cha'DICH for permission to die with honor, and when we got home...our Dad would gloriously kill us in battle and send us all to the Black Fleet.
Fourth Klingon Yorkshireman: And you try and tell the young petaQ of today that? They won't believe you!
Goldshirt Hall: <whispering> Wanna check out their TSA security X rays later?
Goldshirt Oates: <whispering> Nah, I prefer sniffing the cavity search gloves.
Goldshirt Hall: <whispering> Good times.
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