Contest: ENTER TNG Caption This! #459: Crime Wave
- Thread starter LeadHead
- Start date
Picard: Let's just be reasonable about this!
Esoqq: Reasonable?! I'm telling you, Picard... BOLIANS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO HAVE HAIR!!
Last edited:
Picard: Wait, I've got this! Um... that's a knife!
Esoqq: Ah, I see you've played knifey-spoony before!
Berlinghoff's Coat Factory?
You're gonna "Lycra" the way you look. I guarantee it.
CONSTABLE: You're all under arrest.
RIKER: Damn fashion police!
WORF: Since when did the Enterprise have a Fight Club?
RIKER: We were scared to tell you.
PICARD: I'm sorry, Federation policy. I have to hug you.
DATA: Inquiry. Why are Captain Archer, Captain Janeway, young Spock and a Suliban crouching under your console?
RASMUSSEN: We're recruiting you to fix history.
DATA: Again?
BAD COP: We've had about enough of you trying to inject Shakespeare into this show Patrick!
GOOD COP: Hey, calm down. He came from a Shakespeariean background, it's only natural.
Cop: I'd stake my kepi that this is a gentleman's walking stick.
Picard: Your what?
Cop: Kepi. From the French képi?
Picard: How's that now?
Cop: Derived from the Alemannic Käppi: a diminutive form of Kappe.
Picard: Come again?
Cop: Mon beau chapeau, Monsieur.
Riker: He means his hat.
Picard: Oh well why didn't you say so.
Cop: Didn't you say you were from France?
Riker: All the time!
"You take that BACK!!! You know Kirk would win in the fight!"
Picard: "And yet he got his ass handed to him by an old alien who shot him in the back."
"Easy, John, easy -- he's trying to goad you."
Last edited:
Picard: 5 to 1 this fossil thinks it's a real snake
Worf: This is not going to look good on my résumé.
Picard: (Singing) On the Good ship... Lollipop... THERE, are you satisfied?
Data: If it was originally owned by one individual, why are there 2 chairs?
Good cop: I'm going to stop you right there, Bob. It's pretty insensitive to keep calling him Dicks on Hill
Constable: And, what do you call this, er, act of yours?
Riker: The Aristocrats!
Worf: I did not know Guinan was that strong. Five guys are piled on her and she is still able to body slam them! I must admit, I am a little turned on now.
Riker: I did not know I was into that!
Picard: For the last time, I'm already circumcised, you can put the knife down!
Data: This is not what I expected.
Rasmussen: Yeah, that's what they all say. For some reason, everybody expects "T.A.R.D.I.S."
Man #1: What a strange person.
Man #2: *getting mad* Now look here, my good ma--
Captain Picard: Ah don' wanna talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food-trough
wiper! Ah fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster, and
your father smelt of elderberries!
Man #1: Is there someone else up there we can talk to?
Captain Picard: No! Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Picard: There's something out there?! On the wing?!
Girl: Sheesh. I guess the Royal Shakespeare Company never heard of Rod Serling.
SHE DON'T KNOW NUTTIN' ABOWT IT JAHNNY!
She doesn't know anything about it.
SHE DON'T KNOW NUTTIN' ABOWT IT JAHNNY!
She doesn't know anything about it.
SHE DON'T KNOW NUTTIN' ABOWT IT JAHNNY!
- I'm gonna kill him.
Hold on, Johnny, think of your pension.
YEAH, JAHNNY. TINK OF ALL DAT AND WHATNOT.
Esoqq: Who wants ♪piiiiie♪?
Riker: We don't talk about fight club.
WORF: Since when did the Enterprise have a Fight Club?
Similar threads
- Sticky
