Lwaxana Troi: I can still see you ducking down there, Jean-Luc. And Wil, why haven't Mr. Woof been housebroken?
Deanna Troi: (OS) MOTHER!
TNG Caption This! #450 Gag Reel Free For All
- Thread starter LeadHead
- Start date
Lwaxana Troi: I can still see you ducking down there, Jean-Luc. And Wil, why haven't Mr. Woof been housebroken?
Deanna Troi: (OS) MOTHER!
WORF: I think he's dead. And he's the only one the aliens will talk to! Now they'll kill us all!
RIKER: Prop him up and get me a pair of dark glasses! I saw this work in a movie once.
STAR TREK: Weekend At Picard's
Riker: I warned him not to order an Earl Grey for Ensign Rohypnol.
WORF: Wesley is on his way up to see you, captain.
PICARD: Oh fuck.
PICARD: Doctor, I need to see you urgently. In the meantime I'll show it to Worf and get his opinion.
PICARD: I believe you specialise in acute smugness, doctor. Have you met commander Riker?
PICARD: What are you doing with your dick, lieutenant?
WORF: You told me to hold the lift. I improvised.
PICARD: Playing dead has never worked Riker. Now go to your meeting with Wesley.
Frakes: "What are you doing?"
Patrick: "It's called 'acting', Jonathan. All true performers of the British stage know how to do this."
Patrick Stewart: I knew this show wouldn't last. I just knew it would fail.
Riker (drunk): Hey baby.
Worf: Commander?
Riker: Did you guys draw something on my face while I was sleeping again?
At that moment, Picard had a strong suspicion that Worf was stuck at the door.
Patrick Stewart: That's the best acting I've seen him ever do on the show.
Riker: I don't care if it is an awesome Airplane autopilot reference, I AIN'T DOING IT!!!
Riker: I don't care if it is an awesome Airplane autopilot reference, I AIN'T DOING IT!!!
Worf: Surely you can't be serious?
Riker: Troi says it's a well known fact that some people put up an extra-tough front to overcompensate for their secret feminine side.
Worf<falsetto>: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat??
Master Shake: Get me out of this ugly bag of mostly synth-cheese!
Frylock: Dammit Shake, I'm still trying to deal with Meatwad's hyperaccelerated growth space baby and Devolved Spider-Carl! And who designs a #@&*% Galaxy-Class starship bridge over a #@&*% crawlspace??
Picard's impression of roll-on deodorant did not go over well with the crew.
Worf: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!!!!
Sir Patrick: Ooh! A penny.
Picard: This is Numdah One.
Guy: He looks more like a Number Two to me.
[Worf snickers]
Riker: Wow. I didn't know you could put 'em on the glass in a space suit.
Sylvia Wiss, offscreen: Would you say these look like the breasts of a 43-year-old woman?
Worf: No. No, they don't, Miss Wiss. They're quite impressive, bordering on spectacular.
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I'm a winner! Congrats on the big number LH.
Picard: And this is how I sniffed Beverly's bicycle seat...
Riker: Why are you telling me this?!?!?!?!
Dorn: How much to be on DS9?! Come back with a lot more zeroes. And a lot more numbers in front of the zeroes.
Picard: Sure, he didn't kill the guy, but do you want to push for the attempted rape charge?
Dorn: FFS! We've had real automated doors for years! Put a bloody sensor on the thing!
Riker: How the hell do you sit on these things when you can't turn them round?
Picard: And this is how I sniffed Beverly's bicycle seat...
Riker: Why are you telling me this?!?!?!?!
Dorn: How much to be on DS9?! Come back with a lot more zeroes. And a lot more numbers in front of the zeroes.
Picard: Sure, he didn't kill the guy, but do you want to push for the attempted rape charge?
Dorn: FFS! We've had real automated doors for years! Put a bloody sensor on the thing!
Riker: How the hell do you sit on these things when you can't turn them round?
Riker, droning: I can't believe I ate that whole thing.
Troi, offscreen: You ate it Will.
Riker, droning: I can't believe I ate that whole thing.
Riker: Deny me a captaincy! Who cares if I missed Sitting in Chairs Day and Walking Through Doors Day at the Academy! Man I got this!
Thanks for the win LeadHead! I'll try and think of something again but I only just saw the new contest. 
