RIKER: I've always loved you!!!!
WORF: I know.
TNG Caption This! #410: Lightning Round!
- Thread starter LeadHead
- Start date
WORF: I know.
^ Ha ha ha! But wrong flick....
Worf: It's got a Starfleet warp engine, a 1200 cubic centimeter dilithium crystal plant, it's got Starfleet nacelles, Starfleet plasma injectors, Starfleet phasers. It's a model made before isolytic converters so it'll run good on regular plasma. What do you say, is it the new Bluesmobile or what?...
Riker: Fix the cigarette lighter.
Worf: It's got a Starfleet warp engine, a 1200 cubic centimeter dilithium crystal plant, it's got Starfleet nacelles, Starfleet plasma injectors, Starfleet phasers. It's a model made before isolytic converters so it'll run good on regular plasma. What do you say, is it the new Bluesmobile or what?...
Riker: Fix the cigarette lighter.
TFTW Leadhead!
Riker: Don't worry, this is how I got rid of my unwanted bastard son as well. I won't tell.
Riker: See, not an inch of fat on me. And I'll be that way forever!
Yar: What the hell is it?
Data: It is green.
Riker: Don't worry, this is how I got rid of my unwanted bastard son as well. I won't tell.
Riker: See, not an inch of fat on me. And I'll be that way forever!
Yar: What the hell is it?
Data: It is green.
The lens flare is truly a dangerous foe.
T'Jon: I'll show you the power of heart!
Riker: Yup, pretty lame.
Data: For a weapons system that eliminated the entire population of this planet, it is a very poor shot.
Tasha: The were probably programed by Imperial Stormtroopers.
That's a bit confusing. If they were designed by Imperial Stormtroopers, wouldn't the inhabitants of that planet have survived?
Worf: "I do not understand, commander. If we can simple erect a level one forcefield and order the computer to remove all oxygen from the room, thus depleting the fire's source of fuel and exstinguishing it, why do we have to stand here and let it burn and risk personal injury and the safety of those within?"
Riker: "Mr. Worf, where's your sense of drama?"
Riker: "Oh, shit! That was the only known bathroom on the ship!"
Worf: "I told the captain it would be unwise to stop by planet Chipotle!"
Riker: And for future reference, the next time Data tells you he's going to set the poker game on fire, check his ass for matches!
Director: ...and cue electroshock.
Frakes: Do what now?
Director: Electroshock. Now.
Frakes: What, like, draw my phaser?
Director: No, the aliens have bioelectric shock power. From their hands. Ready?
Frakes: What, like, from touching the computer or something?
Director: No, they're Ornarans. The Ornarans and the Brekkans have internal bioelectric fields they can summon at will. Ready? And, cue electroshock.
Frakes: Cool!
Director: And this is traditionally where the actor pretends to be electrocuted, Jon.
Frakes: It says "T'Jon" in the script. Like a Vulcan. A golden-haired, free-spirited Vulcan T'Jonny everyman.
Director: No...not T'Jon. Jonathan. This is where you, Jonathan Frakes, pretend to be electrocuted. Ready? And, cue electroshock.
Frakes: But how can they take a shower?
Director: THEY JUST CAN, ALL RIGHT??? SHEESH, FANBOYS! CUE ELECTROSHOCK, JONATHAN FRAKES, ACT ELECTROCUTED. READY?? AND...ACTION!
Frakes: Tee hee! Tee hee!
Director: CUT!!! WHAT THE...I DON'T EVEN
Frakes: Now what?
Director: Jonathan Frakes, what do you think being electrocuted is?
Frakes: Oh you know, it's like being licked by a hundred puppies.
Director: Who told you that?
Frakes: Fergie LeBort?
Director: Levar? Levar Burton told you that?
Frakes: Yeah, I asked him what it would be like touching the warp juice and he said "Go ahead, it's just like being licked by a hundred puppies."
Director: Well it's not. It's more like how you felt that time you put an extension cord down your pants.
Frakes: Ohhhh. Gotcha.
Director: ALL RIGHT. CUE ELECTROSHOCK. AND..ACTION!
Frakes: Deeeeeerrrrrrrrp????
Levar Burton: It's capital F for LaForge! And capital V for LeVar! Putz!
Director: CUUUUUUUUTTTTT!!!!!!!!
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FRAKES: Should we really be trying to cram prosocial messages down the viewers' throats?
NETWORK EXEC: Drugs are BAD! SAY IT! DRUGS ARE BAD!
