The Missing Line of Dialog that Destroyed Star Trek XI

[Jackson_Roykirk]

Young Spock (Quinto) to Old Spock: Who are you? You look vaguely familiar.

Old Spock (Nimoy): Uhh...My name is, uhh, my name is Selek. Yeah, that's right -- I'm your cousin Selek.

Young Kirk (Pine): Then who's that old fat balding guy standing behind you?

Old Kirk (Shatner): Me? Ummm....I'm, uhhhh....I'm your cousin -- no wait, Uncle!...I'm your Uncle, ummm, James...errr...Frank. I'm your drunk Uncle Frank. But you can just call me Druncle Frank.

 

[captainkirk]

Young Kirk crashes into a manure hauling hover truck.
Cop: What is your name?
Young Kirk: I hate manure.

 

[cooleddie74]

McCOY:"Meh. Nobody will miss these blood tests. Go on, guys. Keep fucking like jackrabbits."

 

[Nerys Myk]

"So you're all astronauts on some sort of... star trek?"

 

[cooleddie74]

CAPTAIN ROBAU:"That attacking ship will stop its assault once it sees just how BAD ASS I am!!!"

 

[Kryton]

"So you're all astronauts on some sort of... star trek?"

Now WHY couldn't there be a strike when filming THAT day!

 

[ITL]

"FUCK, it's the Romulans! Bastard!"

or...

"Put it away, Jim! Damn thing nearly had my eye out!"

or...

"WOW! DIDYA SEE THAT SHIP EXPLODE? KABOOM! EAT HOT PLASMA. TWATTYBOLLOCKS!"

 

[Misfit Toy]

"I've got a bad feeling about this..."

 

[Jackson_Roykirk]

Spock: I'm mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

"TargeeeTING asteroioioioid!!!"

-----

Starfleet Admiral: "So what if I sent every ship in the quadrant on missions away from Earth. What's the worst that could happen?"

 

[Garth Rockett]

OLD SPOCK (looking around the Enterprise's bridge): I was in a place like this once. Sri Lanka, formerly Ceylon. It was three o'clock in the morning and I had to find a thousand brown M&M's to fill a brandy glass or Ozzy wouldn't go on stage! Well, Jeff Beck pops his head around the corner and says there's a little sweet shop over on the edge of town. So, we go. So there's me and Keith Moon and David Crosby trying to break into this sweet shop, right? Well, we get in. But instead of a guard dog they have this bloody great big bengal tiger! I managed to subdue the tiger with a can of mace, but the shop owner and his son... that's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their own shoes. Nasty bit of business that was. But, I got the M&M's and sure enough, Ozzy went on stage and did a great show!

 

[Classic Fan]

Kirk: Holy Cow! My rug blew off! Swing her round. We'll pick it up.
Spock: "But, sir, we're on 'the' mission."
Kirk: Good thinking. We'll pick it up on the way back. We gotta mark the spot, though. Put a red shirt in a life pod. Have him move in circles until we return.
Spock: It could be days.
Kirk: Then put some food in the life raft, for god's sake, man. Do I have to think of everything? We'll tape his favourite shows, he won't miss anything.

 

[T'Cal]

OLD SPOCK: I just wanted to say good luck. We're all counting on you!


-or-

KIRK: Nero's hit! I'm going in after him!
VULTAN: Oops.. sorry, wrong set!

-or-



OLD SPOCK: Jim, they need you on the bridge.

KIRK: The bridge? What is it?

OLD SPOCK: It's the small room at the top of the ship with screens, buttons, and flashing lights... but that's not important right now.


-or-


SPOCK: You will not presume to lecture me!
KIRK: Oh, cut the bleeding heart crap, will ya? We've all got our switches, lights, and knobs to deal with, Spock. I mean, up here there are literally hundreds and thousands of blinking, beeping, and flashing lights, blinking and beeping and flashing - they're *flashing* and they're *beeping*. I can't stand it anymore! They're *blinking* and *beeping* and *flashing*! Why doesn't somebody pull the plug!

Gotta love Airplane movies. That last bit with The Shat in Airplane 2 is a great scene!

 

[Kryton]

The line comes right after the big, huge, improvised fake orgasm scene.

"I'll have what SHE'S having."

 

[SPCTRE]

Nimoy to Quinto: "Mister Spock, I came as soon as I heard what happened centuries ago."

 

[cooleddie74]

AMANDA:"Hold on a second, Spock. I'm just going to run into this store for a few moments. I won't be long."

 

[Cyrus]

Scotty: That lieutenant Uhura, does she go?

Spock (raising an eyebrow): Well, she sometimes 'goes', yes.

Scotty: I bet she does, I bet she does, say no more, say no more.

 

[Aragorn]

Scotty: "For my next experiment, I will drop a message board troll into a lifesize blender and we'll see what happens."

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Kirk: "It couldn't get any hooter ah- hotter than it is now."

Uhura: "You are wearing your coat."

Kirk: "Am I? Why would I do a silly thing like that?"

Uhura: "Because it's cold out?"

Kirk: "Well it is a bit nipply -err nippy out. Ha! What am I saying, nipple? But there is a nip in the air though."

 

[Nowhere Man]

Old Spock: " I'm getting too old for this shit"