Nemesis - Extended Ending

[Ethros]

Re: Nemesis - Extended (maybe) Edition

Just watching the redone version now. One thing I always notice is Riker saying the first time he saw Data was on the Holodeck whistling 'pop goes the weasel'.

But actually wasn't it on the Battle Bridge he actually saw him first? I guess he meant 'met' him


Edit: finished watching it, very nice work. I think you need the B4 scene though. Just to explain where what happened to him, otherwise it seems the film just forgot about him at the end

 

[Kolrad]

Re: Nemesis - Extended (maybe) Edition

I just watched the second version of the extended ending, and it really brought a smile to my face. Especially the scene in Data's quarters. It was very moving to see Geordi pick up Data's emotion chip and think about the fact that Data accomplished all he did with his own emotions, not the "shortcut" the emotion chip became during the TNG movies.

(Was that the point of that scene? Maybe I read too much into it.)

Of course, this ending would not work with the original movie, because it wasn't set up at all. There would need to have been mention of the emotion chip earlier, as well as some display of emotion by Data in his death scene to set up the surprise reveal that he wasn't using it then. Also, is B4 gone from the ending of this version? I think that would seem like a serious oversight in the context of the rest of the film.

But I enjoyed watching this ending; it made me feel better about saying goodbye to the TNG crew, at the very least! (I also like the idea of Spot making up with Worf for some reason. Awwwwww.)

 

[Admiral James Kirk]

Re: Nemesis - Extended (maybe) Edition

Ethros said:



Edit: finished watching it, very nice work. I think you need the B4 scene though. Just to explain where what happened to him, otherwise it seems the film just forgot about him at the end

Well Data did deactivate him.

 

[Yassim]

Re: Nemesis - Extended (maybe) Edition

Cut suggestions:

- cut the dune buggy as much as possible.

- cut the dentist light in Deanna's eyes.

- cut the long pause between the Ent going powerless and the decision to ram the Scimitar.

But really, I don't think you can save this one...

 

[Admiral James Kirk]

Re: Nemesis - Extended (maybe) Edition

I have more ideas; I think that exchange at the wedding where Worf says "Romulan Ale should be illegal" should be cut because it turns Worf into the same clown figure he was in Gen and INS and kills of his badass mystique from FC and later in NEM.

 

[Brikar99]

Re: Nemesis - Extended (maybe) Edition

Admiral James Kirk said:
I have more ideas; I think that exchange at the wedding where Worf says "Romulan Ale should be illegal" should be cut because it turns Worf into the same clown figure he was in Gen and INS and kills of his badass mystique from FC and later in NEM.

That's definitely one of the cuts I would make.

 

[Shikarnov]

I haven't read all the comments since I don't have a lot of time, but I wanted to say GREAT JOB. Cutting from the wake to cleaning out Data's quarters was perfectly timed, and should never have been edited out.

After that it just felt like an emotional roller coaster ride -- and that's not a reflection of your work, but, rather, a reflection on the original writings.

Sadness at the wake, intensified by the cleaning of the quarters. The B4 crap was exactly that. Then we're happy with Picard talking with Crusher, and sad with Riker leaving, laughing with the gag on Madden.

Just too much bouncing around, imho.

Thanks for sharing your fantastic work!

J

 

[Partsking]

Excellent revision, IMO. I really enjoyed the first one you posted. Like another poster said, it made me want another TNG movie. Don't know what you've got, till it's gone.

Well done.

 

[StewMc]

ialfan said:
* The scene with Picard and Crusher in his quarters prehaps dubbing over the 30 years reference with 20 years to make it more acceptable.

Just caught this, why is 30 years not acceptable? At the time of Nemesis Wesley should be 30 years old (which is quite scary actually), as he was around 15 in "Encounter at Farpoint", which was 15 years earlier. Since Picard introduced Jack to Beverly (I think) sometime before Wesley was born, they must have known each other for at least 30 years.

Thanks for the comments everyone. Been editing through the first half of the movie and here's a rough outline of what's been changed:

- Worf hangover gone, replaced with Wesley scene (for now)
- Picard/Data scene follows Enterprise flyby, followed by the original first scene with Shinzon.
- Buggy scene cut completely, we now go straight from discovering the head to the lab on the ship.
- A lot of B4's dialogue cut ("Why does the tall man have a fuzzy face?")
- Worf talking to Picard after the briefing is back in.
- A few extra lines when Shinzon and Picard meet are back in.
- Picard and Troi in the corridor is back in.
- First mind rape scene in Riker/Troi's quarters moved to it's original position in the script.
- Extended Picard/Beverly scene in quarters put back in.
- Deleted second mind rape scene now back in where the bedroom scene was in the finished movie (where it should have been originally).

That's about the first hour of the film. The lounge scene is also in at the moment, but not sure about it just yet. The removal of the buggy scene also means the film is pretty much void of any action for the first hour, but it just about manages to plod along. Might get the scissors out again to try make the first half of the film slightly shorter.

 

[PhotoBoy]

^ Good work dumping the buggy scene, I was wondering the other day if it could be chopped out without leaving a hole in the plot.

 

[StewMc]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

Couple of transition examples for anyone who's interested:

Clip 1 - From Geordi and Guinan to Wesley, Picard and Crusher

Clip 2 - Straight cut from finding B4's head to the Enterprise

Clip 3 - Worf's conversation with Picard straight after the briefing

Still in two minds about the Wesley scene: the dialogue about the Titan's engines is cringworthy.

 

[Harvey]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

^^
The Dune Buggy Cut is great, the Wedding one really shows how the Wesley scene doesn't completely work, and the Worf/Picard scene is good, except for the music cue-- it doesn't quite work.

 

[StewMc]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

^
Yeah not too happy with the cue myself, found it on the soundtrack and though I'd throw it in to see what it was like. I would like some sort of score on that scene to give a little bit of tension, just got to find something appropriate.

 

[Brikar99]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

I think the dune buggy cut is a little jarring... I feel like it needs just a teensy bit more, even as little as half a second. As it is, it still feels like it cuts in the middle of a shot. Data's head is still moving, and B-4 has barely stopped speaking.

 

[StewMc]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

^
Yeah I agree, but in actual fact it originally cut away to the attacking aliens at the exact same time, I didn't trim down the shot in anyway whatsoever (only the audio to get rid of gunfire and to continue the last half-second of music into the lab scene). So there isn't any more footage to extend it with, unfortunately.

Unless I try slowing down the last half-second to drag it out for a full second. Hmmm...

 

[Harvey]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

^^
The cut worked for me, and at least in the context of the film, doesn't seem out of place. Better than a dune buggy chase, that's for sure.

 

[Brikar99]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

StewMc said:
^
Yeah I agree, but in actual fact it originally cut away to the attacking aliens at the exact same time, I didn't trim down the shot in anyway whatsoever (only the audio to get rid of gunfire and to continue the last half-second of music into the lab scene). So there isn't any more footage to extend it with, unfortunately.

Hmm, weird... I wonder if, maybe, attack it from the other end as well - do a quick fade from Data holding the head before B-4 says "Fascinating" and cut the shot of the arm diagram on the monitor, and go straight to the moving shot that goes past the arm on the work table. The fade softens the cut, and you go from a static shot to a moving one.

 

[Admiral James Kirk]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

StewMc said:


Still in two minds about the Wesley scene: the dialogue about the Titan's engines is cringworthy.

I think you should just leave Picard and Bevely. The stuff about "You're losing a son and gaining an empath" is simply charming but Wesley is an unneccesary beat.

First the dialogue is abysmal.

Second Wheaton's acting is atrocious. I mean we're supposed to buy that he's excited about serving as an engineer on Titan but that he's easily distracted by a couple of hotties at the reception but...

Wheaton-and I know he's straight-plays the part so effiminately that I have no choice but to believe that the only reason he went over to the girls is to ask if he could try on their dresses.

After The First Duty and Journey's End I expect better acting from Wheaton. Just awful!

 

[StewMc]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

Admiral James Kirk said:
I think you should just leave Picard and Bevely. The stuff about "You're losing a son and gaining an empath" is simply charming but Wesley is an unneccesary beat.

First the dialogue is abysmal.

Second Wheaton's acting is atrocious. I mean we're supposed to buy that he's excited about serving as an engineer on Titan but that he's easily distracted by a couple of hotties at the reception but...

Wheaton-and I know he's straight-plays the part so effiminately that I have no choice but to believe that the only reason he went over to the girls is to ask if he could try on their dresses.

After The First Duty and Journey's End I expect better acting from Wheaton. Just awful!

Heh, I'd actually decided to leave just the Picard and Beverly stuff just a short while ago. I've re-jigged the order of scenes slightly so that we first get Picard and Bev talking, with R&T going to sit down, then the Guinan bit, and lastly Picard and Bev join the Rikers at the table.

So in the end Worf gets some dignity back, we're still spared Wesley's drivel about dual intermix chambers, and Beverly gets some small talk that's not about firm boobs.

 

[Brikar99]

Re: Nemesis - Extended Edition

Good call.