Movie Caption Contest #73: Klingons on Parade

[cooleddie74]

CHANG:"What's that alarm sound? Have our sensors picked up their ship?"

K'NAG:"No, sir.

It's my wife. She wants to know if I'm still bringing fresh targ platter home for dinner."

 

[Alrik]

For our first picture of Scotty and Uhura (*shudder*), our winner is:......


Sweet. Thanks for the nod.

So our exhaust port plasma diffuser isn't scheduled to be installed until Tuesday. You're telling me this now why???

 

[Nerys Myk]

CHANG: You are the weakest link! Goodbye!

 

[cooleddie74]

K'NAG:"Would this be a bad time to tell you Keltag over here plugged up the only working toilet left on the ship?"

 

[Alrik]

Keeping with the theme.

Why yes, I did take the Communications Officer up on her invitation to play 'motor boat'. Turns out she is also into the Asian ritual of Bukkake. Quite an impressisive woman. Why do you ask?

 

[Triskelion]

Riker: I prefer Pringles to Ruffles.
Worf: Pringles have no honor.

Chang: Trilobyte, you man the sensors. Horseshoe crab, you monitor operations. Denobulan buttocks, go get us some raktajino.
K'nag: Sir, we don't like it when you refer to us by our ridge patterns.
Chang: Ok point oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh two kellicam panties.
K'nag: Horshoe crab it is, sir.

 

[Alrik]

Riker:"You'd better cool it with the cheap beer Worf. Another one like that and your going to cause the paint to peal."

Worf:"With all due respect sir, on a Klingon vessel, that would have been considered an air freshener."

 

[cooleddie74]

RIKER:"You Klingons never break wind small, do you?"

CHANG:"Status report?"

K'NAG:"All weapons charged and online. Torpedo bay loaded and ready to fire at your command, General!!"

KELTAG:"Bridge decor retro and fabulous! Mood lighting just right for the scrumptious after-battle songfest and party!"

 

[cooleddie74]

WORF:"Sorry, sir.

I...do not wish to insult a close friend and senior officer...but...

can you POSSIBLY use more aftershave? You smell like a Risan whore's armpit after a gang bang."

 

[Alrik]

Worf:"Sorry sir. Perhaps suggesting a three way with Deana was a mistake."

Riker:"I'll take it under advisement Mr. Worf........I do like the way you taught her to tea bag."

"My Shakespeare is becoming bothersome now is it? Maybe it would be a good time for you and I take take a walk by the airlock."

 

[cooleddie74]

RIKER:"Nice zit.

Does it have a sister?"

 

[Rat Boy]

Frakes: "Hey, don't look at me. I'm only directing; I didn't write it."

 

[scottydog]

Riker: "Worf, no one is laughing at you. So what if the secret is out that after TOS, Klingon forehead ridges were genetically engineered from an inverse-vaginal plaster cast."

Worf: <pauses> "The vaginal donor was Lwaxana Troi."

<Riker bursts out laughing>

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Many thanks for the fair judgement of my humor.

I can only hope future caption contests will be devoted entirely in my honor.

Klingon 1: "Let's go out to dinner tonight. How's Chinese sound?"

Chang: "Sound? Sound and fury-"

Klingon 2: "This is why we never take you anywhere! You always do this!"

Worf: "Smell... overpowering... can't..."

Riker: 'Do you have a problem with me, Mister??!"

Worf: "Ballstink... too strong... can't breath." (Decompression alarm goes off)

 

[Triskelion]

Riker: So...shall we deploy a warning buoy around that thing?
Worf: <runs out crying>

Chang: Well? What do you think of my new uniform?
K'Nag: Parachute pants, General?
Chang: Wait, there's more! <turns around>
Crew: Ew, no one wants to see that!
Keltag: It looks like two asteroids and an oil slick.
Chang: Q'Pla!

 

[Mistral]

"Klingon #2! What is the best way to vivisect a Romulan?"

"Can I use a lifeline, sir?"

"You can, but I've already had them executed."

 

[Nerys Myk]

CHANG: Come on, someone's gotta know what the greenlight means!!!!

 

[Candlelight]

"Alright alright, I won't do the Shakespeare anymore. Just give me one more, say after that torpedo hits us"

"OH MY GOD IT'S HUGE!"
"For the 17th time... that's my nose"
"Ok... OH MY GOD IT'S-"
*phaser blast rings out*

 

[M'Sharak]

"No, sir -- I'm afraid that Cloud William and Cloud Festus are employed by the establishment
next door. Perhaps you'd like to try dining at Targ-in-the-Box today, instead?"

 

[Nerys Myk]

CHANG: For the last time, my name is not "Blofeld"!