Movie Caption Contest #149: Deceptions

[Rat Boy]

It's that or nothing...because it's time for another caption contest. First, let's mambo with...

For a voice that ought to make every red-blooded heterosexual male run in terror, our winner is...

Human! Human play dom-jot?!

Seriously, can't you hear it? Anyway, for demonstrating that social networking seems to crop up at the worst possible times, our winners are...

Scotty: Look at what Nyota posted to my Wall.
Chekov: I don't think this is the time to be checking your Facebook. After all, the fucking planet is about to blow up!
Scotty: Oh, guess, I should change my status to "...looking for the anti-matter inducer."

"Kirk has gone from 'in a relationship' to 'single'. That's it, I'm unfriending him."

And for...well, thinking too hard about what might be under the captain's hand, our winner is...

"Are you the dwarf call girl I ordered several hours ago?

Come on in. Make yourself at home."

Leave it to cooleddie. And our Photoshop winner, who proves that sometimes a little thing like knighthood could go to somebody's head...

Congratulations to the winners. This week, we have Scotty demanding to know where the nearest toilet is since he hasn't taken a shit in three centuries. Next, B4's having a little trouble understanding Data's request about finding him a female orifice. Then we have Picard being led past the Reman guards, who can't help but notice the assless chaps. Finally, we have a bonus picture I threw in because I couldn't figure out what to do with it. Enjoy:

 

[Rat Boy]

McCoy: "Back home we call him the 'Miracle Worker.'"

Nichols: "Really, you work with the blind and deaf, too?"

Scotty (muttering): "With Kirk, sometimes I wonder."

Spiner: "How many more fucking hours do I have to work with this damn cat?"

As Patrick Stewart learned, security at Buckingham Palace had gotten tighter. And uglier.

Troi: "Dammit, I could never understand this bloody texting shorthand."

 

[LeadHead]

McCoy: It's a pleasure to meet you Dr. Nichols. We've come to meet this mysterious woman, Madeline.

Nichols: Not now.

B-4: Unable to determine gender of cat.

Picard: This is the last time I let you choose the Nightclub Data!

Troi: At least this is one of Picards clean texts.

 

[Candlelight]

ROFTLOLKTHXBYE.

 

[Rat Boy]

Scotty: "And we call him Bones."

Nichols: "Funny, he doesn't look anything like Emily Deschannel."

 

[alte]

Re: Movie Caption Contest #149: Deceptions of Love

 

[Nerys Myk]

SCOTT: Told you this was a Meth lab!

LORE: No, Mister Data...I expect you too DIE!!!!

REMAN1: Heh, that's what Shinzon's gonna look like when he's old.

REMAN2: And I thought he couldn't get any uglier!

 

[Skywalker]

Re: Movie Caption Contest #149: Deceptions of Love

Lore: "Next time, Gadget. NEXT TIME!"

Picard: (to Remans) "Ah, I suppose you're here to interrogate me."
Reman 1: "Something like that."
Picard: "You won't need your rifles. I won't struggle."
Reman 2: "That's real good, Frenchie. But these here ain't rifles."
Picard: "...Oh dear."

 

[tharpdevenport]

Datalore: "I ate his positronic net with some fava beans and a nice Romulan ale."

 

[alte]

Oh, Yeah...the Hannibal Lechter Data...too flippen cool...More Geniusness...I loves it.

 

[Cyke101]

Argh! I missed the deadline, but I'm reposting anyway!

*Scotty presses the button on the screen*
Computer: One vote for McCain. Thank you.
Scotty: Heheh, no, I want to vote for Obama!
*presses again*
Computer: Two votes for McCain.
Scotty: Aoooh, c'mon, it's time for a change!!
*presses again*
Computer: Three votes for McCain.
Scotty (pressing each time): No, no, NO!!!
Computer: Six votes for President McCain.
Scotty: HEYYY, I only meant one of those votes for McCain!

Scotty: I'd pay real money if Nichols here would stop it with the Yo Mamma jokes. I get it, I'm fat, she's fat.

McCoy: They never grow old, do they?

Data: ...and so I ask you: where does the cat end, and where does my suit begin?

Remans had an innate sense of detecting anyone undergoing the Walk of Shame.

*all whispers*
Bob the Reman: There he is! And he's wearing the same clothes he wore last night!
Gary the Reman: Shut up, shut up! Act cool, man! Act COOL.
Steve the Reman: Man, awkward...

Troi: Waitwait, is he serious?! I can't tell if he's joking, there's no smiley!

 

[alte]

 

[LeadHead]

Just so you guys know, I restarted the Caption contest in the DS9 forum, you're all invited to participate!

Kirk: (over comm) Bones are you at the plant?

McCoy: Yes Jim?

Kirk: (over comm) Have you found a sucker?

Nichols: Even though I have no idea who either of you are and you have supporting ID or documentation, I'm gonna drop everything, give you a VIP tour and booze at my office.

McCoy: Bulls-eye.

Spot: Couldn't they have left me out of this movie?

Reman Guard: Hmmm... an Android who is an exact lookalike of the Prisoners 2nd Officer is escorting him to some unknown place, alone and armed. All quiet on this deck.

Troi: After I crash the ship for a second time, there'd better not be a 'lol'.

 

[John Picard]

Lore: "My preciouuuuuussssssssssss"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Scott: "Aye, and now that our business is concluded, perhaps you'd like the good Doctor here to examine ye fer free. I've heard about the primitive health insurance scam ye buggers have in this century..."
McCoy: "Country... this country."
Scott: "Aye, country. He can tell all aboot a fella from a quick set of nude jumping jacks."
Nichols: "Now Madeleine. Dammit! Now!"

Spot: "Meh... It's a living."

Reman 1: "Hey, we're Remans right, part of the Romulan empire, part of the diaspora that escaped Vulcan and logic all those millennia ago, found Romulus and colonised the twin worlds?"
Reman 2: "Well, duh!"
Reman 1: "So how come we look like vampires from Buffy instead of ridge headed Vulcans like everyone else?"
Reman 2: "Don't sweat it. I'm sure Trek Lit will retcon us so that this shit makes sense. Here comes the prisoner, shut up and try and look professional."

Troi: "Huh! What's this say? I've forgot my glasses."
Picard: "It says heading 173 mark 6, full impulse at my command."
Troi: "Oh right. Um wait, does this say encrypted, why's it encrypted?"
Picard: "Because... D'oh!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

SCOTTY: Now that you mention it, I have lost some weight. And it's all thanks to the McCoy Diet.

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Thanks for the winning twofer!

Scotty: And I'll throw in meh assistant, if yah no what I mean.
Nichols: Only if he's hung like this.

B-4: Allow me to return the faulty female undergarment I purchased or your pussy gets it, Mrs. Slocombe.

Stewart: I think we made a wrong turn in the lobby and ended up at the Nosferatu convention instead.

Troi: Oh, now he wants to text me.

 

[26138]

Thanks for the winning twofer!

Scotty: And I'll throw in meh assistant, if yah no what I mean.
Nichols: Only if he's hung like this.

Sulu: Oh My!

 

[Candlelight]

Dude, the 'cockblocking' joke is wearing a little thin. Try something else.

PS: Love the photoshops otherwise.

 

[Rat Boy]

Troi (typing): "OMG! We gonna crash."

Picard (typing): #1 tellz me ur good at it."