Miscellaneous Street - The Soap Opera
- Thread starter Miss Chicken
- Start date
Looks like I shouldn't have left issue #54 of Cthulhu Crosswords Cacophony out on the front rack.
It's not too bad. Should only take a couple of days to straighten out. But where did these goats come from? Isn't there a leash law in this town?
In artifacts. Artifacts from the sub-basement.
Oops, I didn't notice that he was at number 4. Okay, how 'bout this... there are a few modest houses across the street, just at the end of the block, w/ the wilderness starting behind them. I'm in number one. That work?
I suspect the goats belong to that hippy-type woman. You know, the one w/ all the kids?
And, no, you're not going to pay me w/ artifacts. I need a real paycheck, or I might as well just do some interesting volunteer work.
They're very valuable artifacts. And, y'know, powerful.
^Sorry. I guess I'll have to look for another job.
That fine.Maybe you could leave out some food once in a while for the hermit who lives in the wilderness.
KingDaniel, controlled by forces beyond his control, wanders back to Dancing Skeleton's coffee shop. Neighbours apply ear plugs to muffle the obscene sounds that soon echo from within...all night long
.
.
Will do. Also, when I start my veggie garden in the backyard next spring, I'll plant a few tomatoes outside the fence, so he can pick them if he wants.
Wanders off to start decorating her new home...
Okay, fine, I can pay cash. Small bills with non-sequential serial numbers okay?
*Mutters*. It begins... *mutters* Bugrit.
Good; I really was looking forward to working there.
Small, large, sequential, non-sequential... Doesn't matter, as long as they're printed by the government and not by you.
Picky, picky. Okay, that can be arranged. I suppose you want health care coverage, too.
How about goats? You want some of these goats?
How about goats? You want some of these goats?
Don't need health care coverage, thanks. Definitely don't need goats. Are you sure they don't belong to the hippy gal w/ all the KIDS?
He's not trigger-happy. Fifteen percent and we'll talk.
For the rest of you, I'm just finishing up some marshmallow pie!
May I have by goats back, please? They do so like to roam and be free, but it is almost milking time and I will be making some more yogourt this evening. Do you think you'd like some? My yogourt is free-range, organic, In Tune With Nature and gently fermented to dolphin songs sampled with Joan Baez. It will cleanse your system thoroughly, so you may wish to refrain from standing with your backside to an open flame for the first 24 hours after consumption, but I guarantee the slight initial discomfort will be worth it.
While I'm here, do you have any books on creating macrame household objects with goat hair?
I told him they were probably yours!
Do you also make cheese? Although I prefer my yogurt to come from cows, I really like goat milk cheese.
Do you also make cheese? Although I prefer my yogurt to come from cows, I really like goat milk cheese.
It's true - since my unholy ressurrection I'm a new man. Candy Apples - you and your boyfriend have nothing to fear from me. My former thug minions have disbanded, all ill-gotten money repaid.
In fact, I've found a void in my wonderful new life, one that even my late-night "appointments" at the coffee shop (awesome as they are
) doesn't fill. I need to at last take responsibility and build a proper life for myself and those I care about, like (pauses dramatically, looks at Dancing Skeleton's son) my son. And his mother. It's time to be a family.Therefore (and somehow the whole of Misc Street are gathered around)...
...(goes down to one knee)...
Dancing Skeleton...Jenee...will you marry me?
Apparently they do. Although the way they squint at me and mutter unpronounceable mutterings in a language that was old before Humanity was born seems inconsistent with Hippie philosophy.
Heh. "Kids." I get it.
You may feel free to pick up your goats at any time. And I'd love to try your yogurt. Normally I like my food to be dolphin-free, but dolphin song is acceptable (as long as they weren't forced to sing disco against their will).
I had two, but the goats seem to have eaten one. The one I have left is very good, though; but it heavily emphasizes art deco.