There was once a schism amongst the followers of Robau. The bone of contention was whether Robau's defining feature was awesome badassery or badass awesomeness. It got very bloody.
Facts About Captain Robau
- Thread starter Herkimer Jitty
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Robau celebrates Christmas in August. Don't fucking question it.
And he celebrates August in March.
The force that kills all those teenagers in Final Destination? Captain Robau.
Death once stared down Captain Robau - and blinked.
Captain Robau secretly helped make Batman: Arkham Asylum, hence why it is so damned epic.
Captain Robau sat down to play chess with death, and not only did he checkmate death in seven moves, he then took the board and proceeded to beat death's head in with it.
Robau's definition of a "Susie" involves a black hole and winking.
Pretzels do not make Robau thirsty.
Robau believed it or not, but he's walking on air.
The new age-defying injectable comsmetic "thing":
Robautox.
Out of the initial 14 test subjects, once injected with Robautox the results were:
2 were immediately attacked and raped to death by the nurses performing the tests.
7 subjects died after attempting to duplicate deadly feats of Robau.
4 were instantly transported to another dimension and were never heard from again.
1 exploded with the force of a tactical nuclear warhead, destroying the test facility and surrounding village.
Robautox was subsequently banned, and all research and materials pertaining to it destroyed.
The US government has created a special heavily armed task force to watch for the possible return of the four missing test subjects.
Robautox.
Out of the initial 14 test subjects, once injected with Robautox the results were:
2 were immediately attacked and raped to death by the nurses performing the tests.
7 subjects died after attempting to duplicate deadly feats of Robau.
4 were instantly transported to another dimension and were never heard from again.
1 exploded with the force of a tactical nuclear warhead, destroying the test facility and surrounding village.
Robautox was subsequently banned, and all research and materials pertaining to it destroyed.
The US government has created a special heavily armed task force to watch for the possible return of the four missing test subjects.
Bruce Wayne actually didn't spend years training to be Batman with experts, he did it in one afternoon with Robau. He still has far ro go in his training.
Captain Robau mentored NJ's new governor!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQQdZFtHJD8&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQQdZFtHJD8&feature=related
Robau uses the lava floes on Mustafar to heat up Starfleet rations...then doesn't even wait for them to cool down a little.
^And who do you think baked that whiny Anakin Skywalker to a crisp?
Anakin to Obi-Wan: I HATE YOU!!!
Obi-Wan to Anakin: You were my BROTHER, Anakin!!! I loved you!!!
Robau to Anakin and Obi-Wan: Enough of this nonsense....
Anakin: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
Robau to Obi-Wan: Now, pick up his lightsaber and get outta here, before I burn you, too.
Obi-Wan to Robau, Force-speak: Fair enough.
Anakin to Obi-Wan: I HATE YOU!!!
Obi-Wan to Anakin: You were my BROTHER, Anakin!!! I loved you!!!
Robau to Anakin and Obi-Wan: Enough of this nonsense....
Anakin: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
Robau to Obi-Wan: Now, pick up his lightsaber and get outta here, before I burn you, too.
Obi-Wan to Robau, Force-speak: Fair enough.
1945: Captain Robau is walking though some dumpy town, and he passes a Russian and an American having a conversation. He politey interrupts and asks for directions to the nearest hotel, but the two guys ignore him and continue their conversation.
What does Captain Robau do? How does he repay this Russian/American rudeness?
He stages the cold war to get back at them, that's what!
What does Captain Robau do? How does he repay this Russian/American rudeness?
He stages the cold war to get back at them, that's what!
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