Facts About Captain Robau

[F. King Daniel]

...and Portal! GLaDOS is crazy 'coz Robau dumped her.

And Half-Life. Gordon Freeman never talks because Captain Robau tore his voice box out.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

The Federation-class never appeared on screen because it though it was better than the Kelvin, and Robau doesn't like anybody back talking his ship.

 

[Cyke101]

The Super Smash Bros. games were inspired by Robau's family reunions.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

The Super Smash Bros. games were inspired by Robau's family reunions.

And the original Smash Brothers (Canseco and McGwire) were named after each of Robau's nads.

 

[barnaclelapse]

Robau invented Super Mario Bros.

To heck with that--Robau invented HALO!!!

And G.I. Joe, and Call Of Duty.

He also invented SMB because we wouldn't immediately expect that of him. How dare you assume the obvious with Robau.

How...dare...you...

Warren Zevon's classic "Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner" was originally called "Robau the Badass Thompson Gunner", but the song lyrics were later changed because not even Mr. Zevon could capture Robau in music.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau is the reason why Pluto was demoted from planet status.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

Robau is so badass the asgardian god of thunder takes orders from him.

 

[F. King Daniel]

Captain Robau won every single hi-school debate he ever took part in.

By the age of 18, Debaters would come from all over the country to try and out-debate Captain Robau. None could defeat him.

He had achieved the status of Master Debater.

 

[Rush Limborg]

^On that note, Robau trained Denzel Washington's character in The Great Debaters.


Here's another one:

As you all know, Bruce Lee trained Chuck Norris.

But who do you think trained Bruce Lee?

 

[Aragorn]

One time on a Star Trek message board, there was a "caption this" contest and Robau captioned his own picture. The message board froze and everyone who was using it at the time died.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

One time on a Star Trek message board, there was a "caption this" contest and Robau captioned his own picture. The message board froze and everyone who was using it at the time died.

Also anyone within the 20 blocks surrounding said users at that time was vaporized.

 

[EnsignRicky]

Captain Robau once built a tree house; Out of seven hundred and fifty two thousand trees.

 

[Rush Limborg]

One time on a Star Trek message board, there was a "caption this" contest and Robau captioned his own picture. The message board froze and everyone who was using it at the time died.

Also anyone within the 20 blocks surrounding said users at that time was vaporized.

Well--that explains why that one time, when I tried to get on the BBS, I got a message informing me that We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties At This Time; We Apologize For The Inconvenience....

 

[Cyke101]

With DJ Robau, the roof, the roof, the roof really is on fire.

 

[Aragorn]

Robau was here.

 

[Hartzilla2007]

If Positive Matter Robau met Anti-Matter Robau the universe would only be destroyed if they wished it.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau's favorite M&M color?

All of them.

 

[F. King Daniel]

^They make custom M&M's especially for Captain Robau.
They come in a colour outside the normal colour spectrum. Only he can see them.

 

[cooleddie74]

Robau makes green M&Ms horny.

 

[barnaclelapse]

Robau is cooler than cooleddie74.

(Nods)