Facts About Captain Robau
- Thread starter Herkimer Jitty
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Robau has eight brains.
In his scrotum.
And they're all telepathic.
And each brain is, on closer inspection, two brains.
And can each by themselves telekinetically make the meanest dry martini you've EVER tasted in your life.
And he can piss one right the fuck out for you. All you have to do is provide the glass.
Don't ask where he gets the olive.
Don't ask where he gets the olive.
He doesn't get it from anywhere. He WILLS ONE INTO BEING.
George Kirk, only badass after he absorbed the awesome left by Robau's buttocks on his chair.
Robau has no intention of rescuing those horrible children from Lord of The Flies.
Robau once shrank himself down to the size of a flea...just for the chance to beat the shit out of actual fleas.
Robau wears a Halo installation as a wedding ring.
Robau once took the biggest dump in the galaxy. This steaming pile of sh*t is now known as Romulus, inhabited by Robau's hemroids (a.k.a. Romulans).
People invented the warp drive to escape the Robau Rage. Not to be outdone, Robau invented the warp core breach.
Robau is the only known Omega particle to remain completely stable in normal space/time.
Robau once took the biggest dump in the galaxy. This steaming pile of sh*t is now known as Romulus, inhabited by Robau's hemroids (a.k.a. Romulans).
People invented the warp drive to escape the Robau Rage. Not to be outdone, Robau invented the warp core breach.
Robau is the only known Omega particle to remain completely stable in normal space/time.
Chuck Norris was only an average C student at the Robau School of Badass.
You've just hung a vacancy sign on your ass, and Robau's foot is lookin' for a room.
Robau's boxes of TRIX cereal contain actual rabbit. Uncooked.
Robau invented the april-fool.
Robau is capable of making Crispin Glover uncomfortable.
When Captain John Harriman is pissed off at you he will rip out your teeth using pliers.
When Captain Richard Robau is pissed off at you he will rip out your skeleton using his pinky.
When Captain Richard Robau is pissed off at you he will rip out your skeleton using his pinky.
Can Captain Robau create a puzzle so complex that even he himself cannot solve it???
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