DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular character!

[LeadHead]

Happy Saturday to everyone! Hope the New Year is treating you well thus far, lets get to it!

First up to the plate, we have the "Forget this, I'm going to Vic Fontaine's Lounge" Award, going to:

"Ladies and gentlemen..Mr Conway Twitty!"

Next, we have the "Unruly Customers Award" going to:

Quark: Look, guys--don't shoot the messenger, all right? I don't want any trouble. But...when I said, "We're all out"--I meant, "We're all out!"

Next, we have two taking home an award on this one, they both get "The Bill of Making LeadHead's brain explode" Award,

QUARK: Staffing the bar with my clones was a mistake.

ODO: Why is that?

QUARK: I don't trust me.

And,

Quark: "It's a good thing that waiter isn't coming so close."

Odo: "Oh really?"

Quark: "If he did, I'd be beside myself."

Coming up next, we have the "Take That!" Award, going to:

Bareil from below: "Ladies and gentleman, I'd like you all to take a moment from your libations to contemplate the suffering of the Bajoran war orphans."
Quark: "Boo! Boo!"
Morn: "Terrible, get off the stage."
Kira from below: "Have you no respect! You don't heckle a Vedek."
Quark: "No one heckled Winn, and now she's Kai."

...


...

Kira: "Fair point."

Next, we have the "But the real question is; does a Runabout go faster than a White Star?" Award, going to:

Jadzia: Quark, are you sure those star charts you sold us to get back home are accurate?
Quark: Of course I'm sure, why?
Jadzia: Because that does not look like Deep Space Nine.
Worf: They're hailing us.
Ivanova, over com: Babylon 5 to unidentified vessel ...
Quark: Aw crap.

Our Photoshop Award goes to:

Quark: "Have you seen the stupid coat they put my action figure in?"
Morn shrugs.

A Special Award for Creative Use of Multiple Pictures:

The Ferengi were created by the Federation.

They rebelled.

They evolved.

They look and feel humanoid.
Some are programmed to think they are humanoid.

There are many copies.

And they have a (business) plan.

Odo: "Quark, I don't mind you employing robots to assist with the bar, but was it really necessary for them to look like you?"
Quark: "Anything to get under your 'skin', Odo."

Thanks very much for the great Captions of 2011, lets keep em coming for 2012! Congrats to our winners! Thanks to everyone for reading, contributing and being cool!

Our next contest will give us a chance to spend some time with someone who doesn't make it into the contests all that often, Mister Jake Sisko!

And a bonus picture this time around, as I was preparing this contest and looking through Jake heavy episodes, I came upon this one. From one of my favorite scenes of all time in media, the music, the voice over, the actors expressions, it just knocks me over everytime. (I guess that means my father has control of my brain) But wanted to say that and good luck captioning it!

 

[LeadHead]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Odo: Hey Sisko's back! Why didn't that kid of his come with him?

Jake: Standing right here, Odo.

Nog's cooking was not well taken by Jake.

Odo: I know it may sound strange, but this time, Jake ends up in jail and you're free to go.

Jake learned his Mortal Kombat moves from Liu Kang.

Jake: We need to stick together.
Nog: Sure..... It was all his fault!

Jake: Dad, this may be a bad time to tell you, I just put my hands in superglue.

 

[Finn]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Sisko: I got the recipe from Commander Riker when the Enterprise was here last week

 

[Ln X]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Jake: I wonder if Ezri plays Dabo? If not I could teach her!

While most of the senior staff thought Jake was crazy, Odo was already one step ahead of Jake. Question was, how could he impersonate Jake, and be gone without Kira noticing?

Jake: Dad I can't eat this stuff! It looks like people's brains!
Sisko: Son we have to respect other's people's cultures, even if it is a little barbaric.
Jake: You mean these are actual people's brains?
Sisko: Erm...

Jake: What did I do constable?
Odo: According to Nog you behaved inappropiately towards the young Bajoran woman.
Jake: I did no such thing, I only asked her for a date!
Nog: She was my date!
Odo: (sighs) I'll let you two gentlemen sort this out...

So strong was Jake's unrequited love for Kira that his heart exploded with passion...

Nog: Gulp! We're in trouble!
Jake: What should we tell Weyoun?
Nog: I'll bribe him...
Jake: Weyoun has no interest in money.
Nog: I'll hook him up with a Dabo girl.
Jake: Weyoun isn't attracted to girls...
Nog: Hmm... What about men?
Jake: No way! You do it!
Nog: No you! You're the handsome one!

Sisko: I'm so proud of you son... But there is something you need to know...
Jake: What dad?
Sisko: It's about Nog... He's your brother.
Jake: What? (breaks off the hug) That isn't possible!
Sisko: Ha ha! Just kidding!

 

[Deranged Nasat]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Jake: "Look, we were drunk, we took a wrong turn, it seemed like a nice place to lie down for a bit... I know the Dominion Lair is clearly marked, but as I said, we were drunk. We're very sorry to disturb you..."

Jem'Hadar: "What about the mess?"

Jake: "...mess...?"

Nog: "Oops..."

Jem'Hadar: "Tell us everything you know about Deep Space Nine's defences, Sisko!"

Jake: "You realize I'm his son, right?"

Jem'Hadar: "Yeah, about that. My orders say "interrogate Sisko", and I'm in real trouble if I don't. But your dad scares me, and it doesn't actually specify..."

Jake: "Fine. Look, we've got these phaser arrays that shoot phaser beams. That's pretty much all I know".

Jem'Hadar: "I thought as much. Okay, you're free to go".

Kosst Amojan: "ALL SHALL BURN IN FLAME FOR ALL ETER...(Jake sudddenly stops dead, causing Kosst Amojan to lurch forward on its own momentum and briefly leave his body) WHAT THE...? STOP DOING THAT!!!"

"Jake Sisko used Fire Blast!"

"Don't worry, Sir. Major Kira is Bajoran; Bajorans are ground-type, that whole "land and the people are one" thing? Ground-type is resistant to fire".

 

[Skywalker]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Jake: "Note to self: next time, take heartburn medication before the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Jake: "But...we're from the Federation! We don't use money anymore!"
Jem'Hadar: "The machines take quarters! No quarters, no gaming! Now scram!"

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Neil Diamond (o.s.): Turn on your heart light...

 

[Nerys Myk]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

JAKE: Don't worry, man. I didn't rat you out! They won't know it was you who ripped off the jumja stick place.

ODO: Hmmmm.

NOG: You gotta work on your timing.

 

[Skywalker]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Jake: "Hey, guys! What'd I miss?"
*everyone turns to look at Jake*
Kira: "Who the hell are you?"

 

[Nerys Myk]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

JAKE: I gotta tell Dad to cut back on the spices.

 

[Mistral]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Sisko: "So, Nog, what do you think of Louisiana-style chocolate covered maggots?"

 

[Mistral]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Jake: "Wow, the Andorian ambassador sure has a nice rack!"

 

[DS9 Gal AZ]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Everyone except Rene Auberjoinous was shocked that Cirroc Lofton was actually in this scene.

In an outtake from Deep Space Nine, Cirroc Lofton "pretends" to cry over his lack of screen time. "Damn it, how is the Ferengi getting more air-time than me? I'm a main character!"

Jake: Wait a second. I'm the human, the station commander's son, and Nog is a Ferengi and the nephew of a shady businessman. So how come I'm in the holding cell and he's not?
Odo: This is Deep Space Nine. We don't like playing into stereotypes.

Jake: Wait, I'm being possessed by an evil spirit? But that doesn't make sense - I'm not an O'Brien!

Jake: I don't think we're in Kansas anymore -
Nog: If you call me "Toto," I swear on the Divine Treasury, I will tell these guys your body's made of Ketracel White.

Nog: Aww, a wonderful touching moment between father and son. They hug, while I ... stand awkwardly smiling in the background. Okay ... so ... they should be done any time now. *checks watch* Uh, Jake ... sir? I'm just ... gonna go ...

BTW, thanks for the win!

 

[AdmiralGarak]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Odo: "A new character in the final season?"
Bashir: "Well, I'm not giving up any of my screen time to fit her in."
O'Brien: "Me neither."
Worf: "We should give her all of Jake's screen time."
Kira: "Sounds good to me. Tough luck, Jake."
Jake: "You guys are so silly. But, seriously. How many episodes do I get this season? Three? Four?"

Sisko: "I see someone wasn't listening when I told him the fruit was plastic."

Odo: "Let's just say you don't snore within earshot of the Emissary of the Prophets."

Jake: "Mama Mia! That's-a spicy meatball!"

Nog: "Psst-- Stand as still as possible. If this is anything like Jurassic Park, they can't see us if we don't move."

Sisko: "Jake! My long lost son! I've missed you after all these years! Welcome to DS9!"
(Nog whispers)
Sisko: "He's been here for how long!?"

 

[Gary7]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Thanks for the shiny new runabout, Leadhead.

Odo: "See what I mean? I meant it when I said it. No more Odo jokes or you're going to spend the night in there with Jake too!"

 

[Gary7]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Nog: "Psst-- Stand as still as possible. If this is anything like Jurassic Park, they can't see us if we don't move."

Hilarious! I always thought of those Jem'hadar warriors as related to dinosaurs or rhinoceroses.

 

[Mistral]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Jake: "No, I don't own a lawnmower-why do you ask?"

 

[Isis]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Sisko: "Since we ran out of paper drinking cups, I didn't think you'd mind if I unwrapped a few of the plastic ones in your quarters for tonight's dinner."

Jake: "Well, those were my mint-condition Star Trek Tumblers(R) from Burger King."

 

[Unimatrix Zero]

Re: DS9 Caption Contest #47: Jake Sisko; Yeah, he was a regular charac

Odo: "That Jambalaya a la Sisko not agree with you, Jake?"