A lady that I'm really good friends with now said that to me.
I just told her that I knew that, and I wanted to see if I could too.
Chivalry: It's dead, Jim.
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I just told her that I knew that, and I wanted to see if I could too.
People who refuse small kindnesses like that are probably unused to receiving them. If they were accustomed to such gestures, they'd probably hardly notice, let alone react. It is a very sorry state indeed, when something so well intentioned is taken as an offense. Blimey!
I agree. Does it matter from a practical standpoint if you use the correct fork at a fancy dinner party? No. Could you be judged as gauche if you don't? Perhaps. Is it "fair"? Nope. However, knowing good etiquette does make the difference between being mis-judged as crude and as Holdie put it "a pleasant, contented and well-greased slide through daily life."
You can't buy this sort of entertainment. Unless you're a Premium Member here. In which case, you're probably feeling ripped off right now.
Well there's always "reality TV" but this is better.
I'd like a pleasant, contented, well-greased slide through daily life. Unfortunately, I have to use public transport where people don't know how to behave themselves every day, so that's that idea out the window.
You all want politeness ? How about standing on the correct side of the escalator ? Or not walking slowly in groups down narrow corridors ? Or letting people off the train before you get on ? Or not playing your music out loud ? Or not spreading out so you take up other people's space ? Or not forcing the doors open so you can get on just as the train is about to leave (which often has the effect of breaking the door mechanism and taking the train out of service) ? All of these things make you a lot more of a "dick" than not letting a woman sit down instead of you and they help the entire network run much more smoothly.
The reasons people do the things you mentioned above is because they were either never taught or simply don't care about good etiquette. However, you can't control the behavior of other people so there's no use wasting energy on rude people. All you can control is your own behavior plus who you choose to associate yourself with.
It only takes one person standing on the wrong side of the escalator to block the whole thing. It only takes one person trying to shove their way on to the train before everyone else has gotten off to leave the train sitting in the platform longer than it needs to.
If you can't take the heat...
Get yourself a little bike to get to work... then you can start complaining about the roads instead. Might make a refreshing change, for you and us.
Get yourself a little bike to get to work... then you can start complaining about the roads instead. Might make a refreshing change, for you and us.
As I have already said, I get up early to avoid the bulk of the problems. You are the one advocating that people show courtesy to others. The kind of courtesy I'm suggesting would help a lot more people than giving up seats to women.
You obviously haven't.
Choosing to take an available seat ahead of someone who is not disabled, pregnant, elderly or otherwise in need of it more than you is NOT RUDE. We've been through seventeen pages of this now and you still can't understand that. Doing things that impede other people's journeys, whether they are standing up or not, IS RUDE.
So, listen to yourself. Stop constantly saying the same thing over and over again. Just saying something a million times does not make it true. I don't agree with you. I'm not going to agree with you and neither are a lot of people.
Poor choice of word....but your attempt to justify lack of courtesy by saying that others are more uncourteous is still baffling.
Wrong.
First of all, there is nothing discourteous about taking a seat for yourself when you got to it first.
Second, the examples I have used go far beyond discourtesy.
These so called rude people who block your escalator passage are more than likely tourists, and you KNOW that. Who in their right minds would stand in front of dozens of people trying to get to work for kicks? You say "excuse me" and move on. Ignorance is not rudeness. As to the tube doors thing, if YOU had a flight to catch one morning, or something else equally urgent, you too would run for those tube doors, I'm sure. Again, no one would willing fling themselves at closing doors, just to be rude to others! You seem to lack a basic tolerance and sympathy for your fellow man.
Transport for London spends a lot of money on signage, advertising, leaflets etc about Tube etiquette.
And the people who block the escalators are invariably suit wearing "business" people in groups. I can understand why tourists wouldn't understand the unwritten rules, but far too often I see people who really should know better, people I see every day doing the same things.
Guys, we're getting away from the point of the thread.
I think we can sum up what the two POVs are and at this junction we may as well leave it at that as we're getting no where fast.
1- Some view tradition as being fine and enjoy holding doors, giving up seats etc. for women.
2- Some view this tradition as sexist and do not decide to be kind simply because of gender. They are kind either all the time or when they would like to be.
Neither side is "classless" or "ignorant" here so let's cut that crap.
I think we can sum up what the two POVs are and at this junction we may as well leave it at that as we're getting no where fast.
1- Some view tradition as being fine and enjoy holding doors, giving up seats etc. for women.
2- Some view this tradition as sexist and do not decide to be kind simply because of gender. They are kind either all the time or when they would like to be.
Neither side is "classless" or "ignorant" here so let's cut that crap.
Suit or no, if they're just passing through, for business or pleasure... they cannot be expected to be au fait with every single last detail regarding the entire London transport system. And if you are delayed for 30 secs on an escalator, it's a minor thing, just as giving up your seat is a minor thing. Suck it up.
Nor can they be expected to give up their seats for women. Suck it up. See how your logic fails you again ?
sidious618 - you're right. There is no getting through to people like Flux Capacitor, Lindley and An Officer. People who don't hold the exact same set of values as them are rude, discourteous and should walk to work. We get it.
Sometimes I just can't help myself. The big questions, the politically-charged stuff---I don't take sides on that.
Trivial stuff like this which people insist on blowing way out of proportion? Why not.
I was done with this discussion after my first reply. Unfortunately, you and An Officer decided to make it a personal discussion. You blew it out of all proportion.
You're suggesting we all take lessons on how not to be rude from a woman enjoys shooting strangers with water and never could see why they might be angry about it.
If you or An Officer have another problem with me or anything I say, take it up with the relevant moderator from now on. Understand ?
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