Anyone here have a hard time turning down the opposite sex?
- Thread starter RAMA
- Start date
One word.. threesome
's all i'm sayin'
On a more serious note:
This.. it is beyond me how anyone can ever consider cheating if they are in a fulfilling and satisfying relationship. In each relationship i had i never considered cheating because frankly.. why? I hate one night stands now because you don't know the woman at all usually, don't know what turns her on and it's all about the in and out and that's fine too sometimes but having sex with the person you love is so much more.
So, in my opinion, you should take a long, hard look at yourself and your relationship and ask yourself what's missing or if you miss something and work on it if you want that relationship to work. You haven't cheated yet but if there's something amiss in the bedrom talk to your wife.. this is the only way to solve something like that.
's all i'm sayin'
On a more serious note:
This.. it is beyond me how anyone can ever consider cheating if they are in a fulfilling and satisfying relationship. In each relationship i had i never considered cheating because frankly.. why? I hate one night stands now because you don't know the woman at all usually, don't know what turns her on and it's all about the in and out and that's fine too sometimes but having sex with the person you love is so much more.
So, in my opinion, you should take a long, hard look at yourself and your relationship and ask yourself what's missing or if you miss something and work on it if you want that relationship to work. You haven't cheated yet but if there's something amiss in the bedrom talk to your wife.. this is the only way to solve something like that.
Oh please. Call me when you double-fucked a porn star in the ass.
This is sticking to the strictly monogamous definion of what a "relationship" should be. A relationship is whatever the people involved in it want it to be, so long as everything is consensual. You yourself may be happy in a traditional monogamous relationship, but that doesn't mean that those who choose other relationship formats are wrong. My relationship works as well as it does precisely because we understand that it is an impossible goal to expect one person to provide everything his opposite number could ever want.
But then, the word you used was "cheating." I don't cheat on my partner because sex with other people is already on the table, discussed and agreed to openly by all parties. If you claim to be monogamous but you're not, then yes, you're cheating. But that doesn't mean that all relationships that involve sex with others outside the relationship are necessarily a matter of "cheating."
Ok so this is not strictly sexual in nature or even cheating, but its an example of what happens to me time to time. This time it happened online at a bodybuilding chat I recently started frequenting. I find it good for networking...in this case I was innocently talking to some woman who was going to do her first pro photo shoot (something I am going to be doing soon as well), when the lady who runs the site shows up...she has a different site featuring her sexual proclivities which I found out about and she invited both the woman I was talking to and myself to do an S&M photo shoot together, with a paid trip to the studio. The gist I got is that she tends to have sex with her models as well...so can you imagine turning this down? They're still awaiting an answer from me.
RAMA
RAMA
Assuming attraction (I'm not really into BDSM but if I'm just standing around enjoying the view...) I would also have a very hard time turning this down.
I could easily turn it down. Now, I might agree to the trip and the photo shoot, assuming I'm getting paid for it. And if, through the course of trip, the woman and I develop an attraction to each, I could see sex happening. I certainly wouldn't go on the trip expecting or wanting the sex, though. Frankly, the notion that she has sex with most/all of her models would be a really big turn off.
That's the thing, I only have a mild, passing interest in it myself. But it would be a JOB with "benefits" so to speak.
Well this is one of her lesser offending pics...
RAMA
If you're in a happy, committed, monogamous relationship...yeah, of course I can "imagine" turning it down.
Is your wife okay with you being with someone else, or does she see the two of you in a committed, monogamous relationship? If the latter, and you're not talking to her about these feelings and offers and your desire to pursue them...I'm sorry, but you're just being a douchey, dishonest a-hole.
You don't think having BDSM photos of yourself out "there" might harm some future career options?
She would love me getting a second professional shoot so close to the first one (without really trying), but yes the sex part would be a deal breaker.
That's precisely my point. Maybe its below average...and because your test levels are low. I'd at least get it checked out. I've had mine checked 3 times over the years.
RAMA
And there's perfectly sound reasons not to want to do it with someone who gets around that much -- just reading RAMA's post and thinking of the possible STD's sent spiders crawling in my brain. And forget hormones; in the end, the mind is the most powerful sex organ...
Yes. I can't imagine not turning it down.
Surprising as this may seem, I think he's looking for someone to offer constructive advice WITHOUT passing judgment like a self-righteous Pentecostal hypocrit.
RAMA, I'd say you have three choices: you can take the job and let whatever happens happen, you can take the job but take your wife along so you know nothing weird will happen, or you can not take the job. It's really just a matter of what you're most comfortable with.
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