TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain.

Discussion in 'Star Trek: The Next Generation' started by LeadHead, Jan 27, 2013.

  1. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2000
    Location:
    The Normandy SR-2
    Hello everyone! Sorry about the Sunday start, this and the next 2 weekends, I have to work saturday which makes it tough to get things going on time. I'll try to make things start saturday somehow next time, since the Superbowl is next sunday. In case you were wondering.... Go 49ERS!!!!!


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    First up to the plate, we have the "A bet is a bet" Award, going to:

    Next, we have the "Fads of the 24th Century" Award, going to:

    Next, we have the "Pure Awesome" Award, going to:

    Next, we have the "Honest Geordi's Used Androids" Award, going to:


    Next, we have the "Couldn't get those from a replicator" Award, going to:

    Our Photoshop Award, goes to:


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    Thanks to everyone for participating in this contest! Congratulations to our winners!

    Continuing forward on our journey through the TNG seasons to celebrate 300 contests, we go into the 3rd season to one of my all time favorite episodes, "The Defector!"

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    Enjoy!
     
  2. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2000
    Location:
    The Normandy SR-2
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Riker: So with this new keystroke logging program, we'll know who's actually working and who's just playing Angry Birds.

    Worf: (thinking) Damn.


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    Captain's Log, I'm feeling unpopular today.

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    Data: Why is the battle section detached? And coming right at us?

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    Data: I do not understand, the rest of the crew said you would enjoy being stared at for 13 hours.


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    Picard: Is he ever going to speak?

    Data: You muted the transmission, Captain.
     
  3. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Location:
    Somewhere in the South Pacific
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

    Thanks for the win, LeadHead!

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    Jarok: "If you're waiting for me to invite you to join me for a drink..."
     
  4. JirinPanthosa

    JirinPanthosa Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Location:
    JirinPanthosa
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    RIKER: I just discovered this odd program being transmitted to the Klingon homeworld.
    PICARD: Can you tell what it is number one?
    RIKER: I don't know, but it's broadcasting constantly and seems to be called 'HumanTube'.
    WORF: (Damn it, my stream of human bloopers was almost up to ten million likes.)

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    PICARD: If I started wearing a toupee, would anyone notice? Nah...I'm being paranoid.

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    DATA: Is that Wesley out there?
    RIKER: Wesley, where? I don't see anything.
    GEORDI: I agree, there's nobody out there.
    DATA: No, Wesley is right there! If we transport him back aboard right away we still might be able to...
    RIKER: I said, I don't see anything. Do you understand, Data?
    DATA: Yes sir. I do not see anything either.

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    DATA: Curious.
    JAROK: What are you staring at?
    DATA: You are the first Romulan I've met who isn't a complete dick.

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    PICARD: Tomalok, will you please stop trying to be glibly witty and get to the damn point?
    TOMALOK: What's the fun of interplanetary diplomacy without the repartee?
     
  5. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2002
    Location:
    Somewhere in the South Pacific
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Data: "Geordi, is that nacelle supposed to be smoking like that?"
     
  6. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Riker: Although the browser history has been deleted, you can recover it with a simple restore point - oh my.

    Worf: Damn it.

    Picard: K'Ehleyr made an art film?


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    On the one hand, Beverly. On the other hand, the boy.
    On the one hand, Deanna. On the other hand, Lwaxana.
    On the one hand, Ro. On the other hand, Ro's time of the month.

    Blimey, this redistribution of wealth is a bit trickier than I thought.


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    Geordi: Alien ambush from the outer planets!
    Data: This is what happens when you neglect Uranus.
    Riker: Like mother always said.


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    Data: Would you like to exchange your currency? Counselor Troi's lapdances will begin soon.


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    Picard: Is there a reward if we find your puppy?
     
  7. inflatabledalek

    inflatabledalek Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2011
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

     
  8. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2000
    Location:
    The Normandy SR-2
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Riker: Never seen a shuttlecraft fart before.
     
  9. Captain April

    Captain April Commander Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Feb 23, 2012
    Location:
    ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Worf thinking: If I can just ease it out slowly and quietly enough, maybe they won't notice the smell.
     
  10. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Riker: Push this to load your torpedo.
    Picard: That's what she said.
    Riker: Who is she?
    Picard: Counselor Troi.
    Worf: Idiots.


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    Big Bang Theory - was just Friends with product placements! Damn you Progenitors!


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    Geordi: It's a bird!
    Data: It's a plane!
    Riker: It's - Mime Man!
    Geordi: Why is Captain Picard never around to see him?


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    Data: I should warn you. The El-Aurian likes to screw with people who block her view.

    Romulan: One in every bar.


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    Well that settles the Neutral Zone peace treaty. If you're interested, Tomalak, later Mister Data is holding a Bach recital -

    A hundred more years of war!

    Merde. So close.
     
  11. Ayelbourne

    Ayelbourne Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2005
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Hm, what meme to birth next, I wonder.
     
  12. Isis

    Isis Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    May 31, 2009
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

    LeadHead, TFTW. :)

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    Some bad news: That day everyone let their guard down.

    Some good news: Picard and Worf did it at the same time.

    Some more bad news: The crew was quite puzzled when the two of them said, "He's right behind me, isn't he?" in unison.



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    Picard (to self): "I wonder whether Beverly will notice that I've switched from ChapStick to Blistex?"



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    Unbeknownst to Gene Roddenberry until he saw some of the dailies, Burton, Spiner, and Frakes all perceived themselves as having the same good side.



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    When times became difficult in the 24th Century, many did whatever they needed to get by.

    Jarok (in background): "I don't always drink Romulan ale, but when I do, I prefer..."



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    Tomalak (to self): "Damn...wrong number."
     
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2013
  13. Captain April

    Captain April Commander Red Shirt

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    Location:
    ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Picard: (thinking) Damn, Riker does drone on. I'll set my face to stern thoughtfulness, engage.
     
  14. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk A Spock and a smile Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    AI Generated Madness
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    PICARD: ...the hell???? Did they change the Romulan make-up and not tell us?
     
  15. Mutai Sho-Rin

    Mutai Sho-Rin Crusty Old Bastard Moderator

    Joined:
    Jul 31, 2001
    Location:
    Orange, CA USA
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

    ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
    Spectacular!
     
  16. R. Star

    R. Star Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Shangri-La
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

    :lol:
     
  17. Mojochi

    Mojochi Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2007
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Picard: Ouch... K'Ehlyer changed her status to single

    Riker: Meh... No one wants to date a single mom

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    Troi: Which would you like to talk about today, your Borg abduction, your Cardassian torture, or your life on Kataan?

    Picard: (Thinking) I should have taken that job with Louis. How hard could it be to stack dirt in the Atlantic Ocean?

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    Picard's Gladys Knight cover band rehearsals always went hardest on "The Pips"

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    Data: While we wait for the captain's decision, I could read you another one of my poems about my cat

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    Picard: That's far enough, Tomalak! I advise you to stand farther to your left. That wall behind you looks very hot!
     
  18. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    G'Kar: If you call me Spot one more time I will not tell you what intrigues to expect aboard DS9.
     
  19. Gil T.Azell

    Gil T.Azell Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Gil T.Azell
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

    Picard{Thinking} Hmmm, Then again maybe I'll order the Shatner turbo 2000
     
  20. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Re: TNG Caption This! 302: I look forward to our next caption, Captain

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    Riker: No wonder it's so chilly. The environmental controls are set to "Minsk."

    Picard: And who set the security grid on "Booty Alert"?


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    Metathesis is one of the most common of pronunciation errors, sir; a reversal of vowel and conson -

    Go fornicate yourself with a plasma injector, you positronic choad.

    <Ten Forward applauds>