Voyager Caption Contest #70: Funny You Should Say That!

[Jonas Grumby]

"Let me give you a little advice. Something I learned the hard way. Don't fart in that suit."

 

[Disruptor]

"I can't believe I let you talk me into wearing this."
"Me? I thought you were the one into this stuff!"

"Okay, throw me the keys this time, not poop. Got that?"

"After Jennifer's antics, Paramount banned lasagna from the catering menu.".

"What a wonderful day in 'Frisco...hey, is that a Breen ship up there?"

"Unfortunately due to a universal translator error, the alien trader had sold them a rotten candy maker."

 

[JB2005]

What do you mean they won't let us into France?

 

[Nerys Myk]

Most of the time you could find the team from the Pathfinder Project at the beach.

 

[Isis]

Person on left: "OK, it's lunch time."

Person on right: "Well, I have a thought. How about frying up some bacon and eggs?"

Person on left: "Great idea. Your head or mine?"

Janeway: "We come in peace."

Monkey: "Enough with the cliches, Lady. Did you bring any beer?"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Janeway: "Oh my God. I'm back. I'm home. All the time, it was... We finally really did it. "
[screaming]
Janeway: "You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!"
Marcel: "Don't let the pose fool you sister. I ain't the goddamn Statue of Liberty!"

 

[Gary7]

Person (left): "I move for no man."
Person (right): "No, *I* move for no man!"
Persons (left & right): "Well, this is awkward."

Monkey: "No thanks, weird alien person. I can scratch my own back."

Neelix's attempt to brew the perfect pot of coffee went awry... for the 50th time.

 

[Velocity]

It's time for androgeny....here comes Pat!
Hi Pat!
Hi Chris!

Neelix's attempt at cooking Earth favorites resulted in another food fight on pizza night.

guy in blue: If you wait long enough EVERYTHING comes back in style.

the ambassador bellied up to the slot machine: C'mon! Baby needs some new goo!

 

[LeadHead]

John Evansville: Why are we wearing these? It's summer in Southern California!

Monkey: There's a figurative relative of mine on your back.

Ocampan Acne was no laughing matter.

Captain's Log: We have arrived at Tourist Trap IV. I can't see how anything could possibly go wrong.

The Doctor: Based on these experiments, I predict your diarrhea will come back in 30 minutes. Where will you be?

 

[Herkimer Jitty]

Cheers for the win(s). I am a sick, sick man.

Kes: "Oh, man, Total Recall totally wasn't full of shit. This really is what happens if you crack open a window."

Tourist: "Hon, pose in front of the matte painting. I want a picture for our scrapbook."

Doctor: "Congratulations, Harry. You've passed your first kidney stone. I've preserved it for posterity."

Kim: "Wait, first?"

Doctor: "Yes. One down, five to go."

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Dateline: March 20, 2476. Islam officially adopts the form-fitting burka. It is hailed as the most significant religious reform since Vatican II.

Tuvok (OS): "We have thoroughly analyzed this alien machine. As near as we can determine, it either grinds coffee beans, dispenses frozen slush drinks, or gives the user an orgasm. Possibly all three."

 

[boco]

Monkey: Stay away from MY coffee!!

or:

Monkey: I've been on this planet for years, but that doesn't mean I'll mate with YOU

Janeway: A huge coffee machine..Aww that's very thoughtful you, ensign Kim,thank you, but you're still not getting a promotion

 

[Isis]

Kes learned too late that it isn't a good idea to use the warp core to make s'mores.

First there was the Jersey Shore season in Italy, then there was the Jersey Shore spin-off in Jersey City, and finally there was 'Jersey Shore, the Outer Space edition.' Problem was that by Jersey Shore standards, the outer space edition was comparatively tame. And like some of the language on the show, the ratings went completely down the toilet.

 

[Isis]

The sad thing wasn't the flat top of the aliens' hazmat suits. The sad thing was the flat top of the aliens' heads.

Garage sales were alive and well in the 24th Century.

 

[Gary7]

Tom: "Terrific beach setting, eh Harry?"
Harry: "Yeah... but say, what's with these weird looking beach shelters? Most of them shade just one side, so you gotta keep moving them across the day. And what if it rains? Doesn't look like they'll keep you dry any."
Tom: "I don't see beach shelters. I see women! Is there any wonder why you rarely get a date?"

 

[boco]

Mulgrew: We should get a borg doll with big boobs, or else, with the budget cuts we'll only have this kind of aliens!

 

[Yeoman Randi]

Howdy fellow Voyagers! New contest will be put up tomorrow morning (Monday). Until then, engage!

 

[Ayelbourne]

Rule 34
No Exceptions
​

 

[Ln X]

Who the hell are you?

Janeway: That's it monkey! Good monkey! Come to me!
Chakotay (out of sight): Perhaps I should call to it?
Janeway: Please spare me your 'big bear' routine.

Neelix: Kes my sweet you really need to get the Doctor to check out your acne.

Earth 2377, where debauchary rules, vanity prevails and excess exudes out of every corner...

What happens when you cross Neelix's cooking with the Doctor's vanity?

This!

 

[boco]

You stole my halloween costume idea!