Dear Bears,
Holy shit. I certainly thought you guys could pull it out, but I didn't think you'd throw an ass-kicking like that on the Falcons. The defense was fucking lights-out, and Cutler played absolutely great. Cutler owns, Urlacher owns, Forte owns, Peppers owns. I couldn't ask for more, outside of one particular area.
Dear Offensive Line:
Jesus Christ, you guys still suck shit. Four sacks allowed to that anemic pass rush? Really? That said, you weren't awful. I expected far worse after Kreutz's departure. But figure your shit out, for heaven's sake, before Cutler's in a wheelchair.
Dear Jerry Angelo,
Invite Matt Forte into your office. Apologize for being an idiot. Then fucking pay that man.
Dear NFC North,
I'm really and honestly looking forward to your matchups this year. The North having the best D-lines and worst O-lines in the league is going to be amazing.
Dear ESPN Power Rankings,
Falcons at #6, Bears at #13? Y'all be fucked up.