When they do or say something I really don't like or something that offends me. I expect others to give me as good as I give and won't settle, if i'm out of line, I expect people to tell me. Fair?
Personality vs Rules of Communication
- Thread starter Mr Silver
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When they do or say something I really don't like or something that offends me. I expect others to give me as good as I give and won't settle, if i'm out of line, I expect people to tell me. Fair?
Hey, nobody said "Candlejack," so you can't just dis
Its ok man, there is no need. I am fine with what everyone has said, if I couldn't take it, I would meltdown. But as you can see i've been perfectly polite and calm with my replies.
Discipline is control
Wow, you're one to talk.
Somehow your avatar seems to fit the tone of your posts. Just sayin'. Grats there. Good pick.
OK...my next question is, are all of these things you don't like things that actually have an impact on you or do you any damage, or are they simply your personal preferences?
Please, elaborate. I'm curious.
I don't think there was any need for him to speak up on the tone of the posts here.
But can we all chill out a bit maybe?
You're a sharp bloke, I reckon you'll suss it out.
Funny how my post wasn't even directed at you, but you're the first one to jump on the defensive.
Nothing about my post was defensive, just pointing out that you are probably the last person who should consider himself an authority on good forum conduct.
Ok I've had some coffee so i'll give it a shot.
Basically I've realised recently that I have a tendancy to hold out on people, justifying it because of the negative reception i've got in the past for geeking out or being intellectual. But i've also realised that by toning this back i'm keeping a lot of my personality at bay and therefore I need to find a way to have the best of both worlds.
Uhh, or you need to rethink who you're meeting or going out with?
I mean... how can you get a negative reception for geeking out or being intellectual!?!
If you get a negative reception for that... screw them!
Not necessarily. I don't believe it's necessary to always force one's own preferences upon others. Captain M, I posted a question before the thread derailed; not sure if you saw it, in the middle of all that.
I must say, Captain M, I have a hard time understanding what you mean in your first post in this thread. You seem to say that you behave differently to different persons and in different situations. That's normal, we all do it. Of course, you behave differently around your boss than around friends or your parents, to name a few examples. A formal environment, like dinner at a classy restaurant, requires a different behaviour than watching a football game with friends. However, you're still you in all those situations, you're just showing different aspects of yourself. I really don't get the percentage thing. Sometimes, these situations might be uncomfortable for various reasons. Is that what you mean?
ETA: I see you've specified what you meant. I guess, I'm going to mirror { Emilia }'s suggestion to a degree. If you feel uncomfortable even around your friends, you should hold back less.
ETA: I see you've specified what you meant. I guess, I'm going to mirror { Emilia }'s suggestion to a degree. If you feel uncomfortable even around your friends, you should hold back less.
Not necessarily. I don't believe it's necessary to always force one's own preferences upon others. Captain M, I posted a question before the thread derailed; not sure if you saw it, in the middle of all that.
Yeah Nerys I responded too, you'll have to have a search through the trainwreck though
Its a toughie, I'm not sure I even understand, but my intent was to try and explain that i've realised that I have a tendancy to hold out on others because I worry that they won't be able to connect to me. Not because I think i'm superior, (jeez no way, I'm always doing stupid stuff!) but generally because a high percentage of the people around me cannot relate to my intellectual and geeky interests or ideals. It works both ways, I cannot relate to some of their stuff but I try to for the sake of building a connection and friendship with somebody.
Its not as easy as finding different friends, because I like to be able to get on with a variety of people and not just those who I have most in common with. Again, its about me finding a system where I can be myself more and at the same time finding a way to include anyone in conversations or activities centred around my personality, etc.
Well, everyone's not going to appreciate everything, especially if they relate to niche interests. So you can accept that, share a little bit of it, or try to find friends who share more similarities. Personally my RL friends don't know or understand my scifi interests or some of my other quirks, but that's why I come here and have online friends. At the same time, there are things about me that people here probably wouldn't get. I don't think there's a problem with any of that however.
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