Voyager Caption Contest #55: Hot Water Burn Baby~

[Velocity]

I don't know why you all keep calling me Tuvix. I prefer Tulix. It suits me better.
Kes: Promises, promises...

 

[Nerys Myk]

PARIS: I still think we should tell Harry about the transporter accident.

JANEWAY: Why? If his hasn't noticed the difference by now, he never will.

 

[Nerys Myk]

...The Skipper too

 

[Isis]

Yeoman Randi, thanks for the win!

Buzzzzzz...

Apartment dweller (OS, looking through keyhole): "Who's there?"

Janeway: "Avon calling."

Apartment dweller: "It seems you're not wearing your products."

Janeway: "Oh yes, I am indeed wearing them."

Apartment dweller: "Sorry, nobody's home."

 

[Isis]

J.J. Abrams was roundly criticized when he decided to reimagine this episode and call the character Nuvok.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Tuvix: "Kes, my love, it's me! Don't you recognize me?"
Kes: "Buzz off, pervert! I'm seven years old!"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Tuvix: "But Kes, sweetums, Leola Root is most logical."

 

[Isis]

Janeway: "I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too."

 

[Isis]

Janeway: "Frigging Friday's. They told me the wait would be 20 minutes. Well, it's an hour and not so much as a chirp from this thing."

 

[M'Sharak]

"Are you going to eat those fries?"

 

[Kirby]

Kim - Hey, keep it down. I'm watchin' my stories.

Love Boat: The Next, Next, Next, Next, Next Generation.

Doctor - I'ts a Borg baby, it's very rare and will give us a lot of insight on them. Whatever you do, don't lose it.

Tuvix - I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.

 

[Nerys Myk]

JANEWAY: How can every GPS be giving us different directions?

 

[Gary7]

Harry Kim couldn't believe it. Twenty four radio controlled car races, and Janeway won yet again.

Janeway: (quietly, to Paris) "Tom, do you think we ought to let him finally win the next race?"
Paris: "Nah... I'm having too much fun watching the look of disbelief on Harry's face."

 

[Gary7]

Janeway was due for a real surprise, her on-line profile inexplicably appearing on a Cardassian dating website.

 

[Admiral Shran]

JANEWAY: He might be my perpetual Ensign, but you better just watch yourself or I'll bust you back to Ensign in a heartbeat.

 

[Nerys Myk]

HARRY: Blinky lights not blinking.

 

[TiberiusMaximus]

HARRY: There's a...a red thingy, coming towards the green thingy...I think we're the green thingy...

 

[Mojochi]

Janeway: Would you quit texting us? We're standing right next to you!

EMH: It's called water. It has several uses, not the least of which is bathing yourself. Please make use of it

Kim: You really need to stop saying it looks like me

 

[Mistral]

Kim: "Seventy-five points off of a three letter word? That's ridiculous!"

Janeway: "Tom, I told you not to hack Words With Friends."

Paris: "It's just Harry, m'am. He'll never figure it out."

 

[Gary7]

Dejaren: "Isn't it cool?"
Doctor: "Where did you find this... this thing."
Dejaren: "It came crawling out of some kind of egg that was in a cargo container Neelix just got. Feisty little bugger. I immediately doused it with anesthesia and then trapped it in this jar."
Doctor: "Are there any more of them?"
Dejaren: "Oh yeah, there's about a dozen. Neelix is probably unloading the container by now."