TOS Caption Contest #157: No Time To Say Hello, Goodbye ...

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "You'll tell me what I want to know, or you'll watch the Voyager marathon again."
Khan: "I am a war criminal, and ..."

 

[Captain Crow]

 

[Redfern]

Might as well lock the thread. Crow's work is the undisputed winner!

BTW, Shat, thanks for the win a few weeks back! Never expected my Godzilla "insertion" to be a contender.

Sincerely,

Bill

 

[tharpdevenport]

Kirk: "And this is Ceti Alpha V, you're new home. Quaint, huh?"

Khan: "I don't know ... those geological readings of Ceti Alpha VI look unstable."

Kirk: "OH, well, there's a slight chance it might ... explode."

Khan: "Explode?"

Kirk: "Yes, but a very samll chance. Like 8%."

Khan: "You sure?"

Kirk: "OH yeah, almost positive."

Khan: "'cause if it does, I'll have to steal a Federation starship, hunt you down, put worms in the ears of your crew, and then try to kill you."

Kirk: "You know, this was really all Chekov's idea. Here's his picture..."

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "Maybe your mind would be eased by this breast-reduction surgery info tape?"

Sulu: "Your high score is in no danger, Pavel."
Kirk: "FUCK YOU!" <throws controller, hits Sulu in back of head>

Sulu: "Of course they were fucking."

Kirk: "Seriously, when do they put Manning back in? After the fumble for a score, right?"

Kirk: "Magnify."

Kirk, squinting: "Who put their username in as FUKSTKS?"
Sulu and Chekov, together: "Spock."

 

[Nerys Myk]

CHEKOV: I've got a bad feeling about this.

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "DIE, YOU FUCKIN' GORN ASSHOLES! PEEYOW! <twists torso> PEEYOW-PEEYOW-PEEYOW!"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

CHEKOV: I've got a bad feeling about this.

Sulu: "Raaawwarrannnnn!"

 

[Isis]

Kirk: "Never judge a book by its cover...This door is better than my last girlfriend."

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "Keep your heads down. I'm trying to watch the movie."

 

[Gladwin]

Kirk: "This is a Kindle."
Khan: "Yes. . ."

 

[Alrik]

Khan: "And afterward, I require a sponge bath."

Kirk: "I'll see what I can do."

Chekov: "You vant me to vat?"

Sulu: "Hey, I'll volunteer."

Kirk: "Just pilot the ship horndog. Chekov, you have your orders."

 

[Alrik]

Kirk: "Missed it.....by that much."

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "This reminds me of my last Yeoman."

Khan: "We had Skinimax in my day, too, Captain."

 

[Alrik]

Kirk: "Well your strength and intelect may be superior, but your hair style makes you look like a girl."

Khan: "One day Kirk, one day."

 

[Nerys Myk]

Kirk: "This reminds me of my last Yeoman."

SPOCK: "She wouldn't let you come inside either?"

 

[tharpdevenport]

Just when you thought it was safe to fornicate with the turbo lift doors...

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "Spock, Tom Cruise won't come out of the closet!"

 

[steve1961]

Dont Cheat Spock!

Klink!! its Shultz here.

Going to the Holloween Party?

You were President 250 years ago.When in the hell youre doing on my ship?

Gentlemen please,,No Bloodshed here

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "This reminds me of my last Yeoman."

SPOCK: "She wouldn't let you come inside either?"

Kirk: "Flat and red."