What would you do if a friend pee'd on your sofa?

[RoJoHen]

Whatever you make him do now, you have the right to hold this over his head for the rest of your life.

 

[An Officer]

Looks like he needs to be pointed to some help. To get to such paralytic points that you pee yourself is very sad, especially when you're a guest in someone's home.

I'm surprised he didn't offer to clean up, or leave a note with a fee for professional cleaning. Since he didn't offer do any of those things, or even offer a sincere verbal apology, that really is taking the piss!

I probably wouldn't have served the wine with dinner if a friend arrived home already thoroughly sozzled, that's just asking for trouble, although I would have been thinking more of vomiting and a major hangover rather than peeing. I wonder how much alcohol you would need to consume to reach that point, pretty extreme quantities I imagine. Quite rude when you're a guest.

 

[Mark de Vries]

So did he clean it up or not? I can't make it out from your original post. If he did, I'd say it's settled: he cleaned up his mess and made up for it, sort of. If not and he left you with the dirty sofa: tell him and ask him to pay for the cleaning.

 

[SmoothieX]

There's a line in the sand, you can't allow him to step over it.

He pi**ed on your sofa, you need to s**t in his bed.

It's very simple.

Exactly. Don't get mad, get even. With maybe a hint of one-upsmanship.

A great big dump strategically located around the house would work wonders.

 

[Jadzia]

Confront him about it. There's nothing in this for you to feel embarrassed about. Your property has been damaged, so you're the victim. You deserve compensation.

If he dismisses it, then make a fuss, and embarrass him if necessary. In front of his friends if necessary.

If you do nothing, he'll think you're a pushover.

At the other end of the scale, if you're determined, you can take it to a small claims court for the cost of a replacement sofa.

 

[K'Ehleyr]

Hit him with a rolled-up newspaper and put him outside.

I was thinking of rubbing his nose in it.

Looks like he needs to be pointed to some help. To get to such paralytic points that you pee yourself is very sad, especially when you're a guest in someone's home.

I'm surprised he didn't offer to clean up, or leave a note with a fee for professional cleaning. Since he didn't offer do any of those things, or even offer a sincere verbal apology, that really is taking the piss!

I probably wouldn't have served the wine with dinner if a friend arrived home already thoroughly sozzled, that's just asking for trouble, although I would have been thinking more of vomiting and a major hangover rather than peeing. I wonder how much alcohol you would need to consume to reach that point, pretty extreme quantities I imagine. Quite rude when you're a guest.

I really didn't think he was that badly drunk. Perhaps he does have a medical problem?

So did he clean it up or not? I can't make it out from your original post. If he did, I'd say it's settled: he cleaned up his mess and made up for it, sort of. If not and he left you with the dirty sofa: tell him and ask him to pay for the cleaning.

No he didn't clean up. To avoid embarrasment I rubber gloved up and sprayed.

There's a line in the sand, you can't allow him to step over it.

He pi**ed on your sofa, you need to s**t in his bed.

It's very simple.

Exactly. Don't get mad, get even. With maybe a hint of one-upsmanship.

A great big dump strategically located around the house would work wonders.

Fortunately he lives miles away so I can't do that!

Confront him about it. There's nothing in this for you to feel embarrassed about. Your property has been damaged, so you're the victim. You deserve compensation.

If he dismisses it, then make a fuss, and embarrass him if necessary. In front of his friends if necessary.

If you do nothing, he'll think you're a pushover.

At the other end of the scale, if you're determined, you can take it to a small claims court for the cost of a replacement sofa.

I've gone with being a pushover. He lives 200 miles away so I'm not expecting to see him anytime soon.

 

[RoJoHen]

I've gone with being a pushover. He lives 200 miles away so I'm not expecting to see him anytime soon.

Save it for a rainy day. If you ever need something from him, and he doesn't want to do it, just be like, "Hey, remember when you peed on my couch?"

 

[RandyS]

Make him lick it up, then make him pqy for the cushion to be dry cleaned.

And if he stays again, make him sleep in the back yard with the dog.

 

[judge alba]

when he comes over next tell him to bring a nappy just in case

 

[MeanJoePhaser]

I'd be shocked.

I mean, since when do I have friends?

 

[Holdfast]

A: Should I have made a scene and sent him to the nearest dry-cleaners?
B: Should I have joked about it and left a bottle of spray and a cloth in easy veiw?
C: Should I have did what I did and ignored it and cleaned it up myself ~ thus avoiding embarrassement on both parts.

D. Send him to buy you a new sofa in the Boxing Day Sales!

 

[Tim]

Looks like he needs to be pointed to some help. To get to such paralytic points that you pee yourself is very sad, especially when you're a guest in someone's home.

Seriously. The last time I peed myself was when I was a child.

I'd have this guy buy me new sofa cushions.

 

[iguana_tonante]

I would send him an anonymous letter that reads "I know what you did on that sofa".

 

[jefferiestubes8]

someone I used to work with, who I like very much and is adorable, rang and asked if he could "crash" at my place for a couple of days

I notice a dark stain around the groin area and my surrounding cushions.

The next day you obviously cleaned it up yourself as he did not on his own (thus indicating a wetspot and a 'light' stain).
You chose not to make a scene and embarrass him when you found it.

he did stay the next night and bought me a very expensive bottle of St Emilion

He is not a dog who had an accident.
No matter what gift he bought you he did not apologize for it happening.
An apology is the least he could have done even if only half meaning it while joking. Since he was not man enough to bring it up that is rude and inconsiderate.

This would get a banning as an invited guest to your home in my eyes.

If you must take it to a professional dry cleaner you may choose to ask him to reimburse you.
If you let it slide then you just have lower standards than people regarding etiquette.

 

[The Boy Who Cried Worf]

Have him stand on a busy street corner in a diaper wearing a sandwich board that reads "Will pee on your couch for food".

 

[An Officer]

I would send him an anonymous letter that reads "I know what you did on that sofa".

I'm just surprised he came back the next day... if I'd had such a mortifying accident, I don't think I would be so cheeky as to return.

 

[K'Ehleyr]

someone I used to work with, who I like very much and is adorable, rang and asked if he could "crash" at my place for a couple of days

I notice a dark stain around the groin area and my surrounding cushions.

The next day you obviously cleaned it up yourself as he did not on his own (thus indicating a wetspot and a 'light' stain).
You chose not to make a scene and embarrass him when you found it.

he did stay the next night and bought me a very expensive bottle of St Emilion

He is not a dog who had an accident.
No matter what gift he bought you he did not apologize for it happening.
An apology is the least he could have done even if only half meaning it while joking. Since he was not man enough to bring it up that is rude and inconsiderate.

This would get a banning as an invited guest to your home in my eyes.

If you must take it to a professional dry cleaner you may choose to ask him to reimburse you.
If you let it slide then you just have lower standards than people regarding etiquette.

As you can tell, I'm pretty crap at confrontation, but I do have high standards of etiquette which is why I was quite confounded by this one.

But as a host it would be dreadfully bad manners to embarrass a guest ~ whatever the situation.

I'm going with the "You know that I know what you did to my sofa that night and I don't think you'll be ringing me again to 'crash on' unless you really want me to tell everyone in the pub what happened"

Have him stand on a busy street corner in a diaper wearing a sandwich board that reads "Will pee on your couch for food".

Soooooo tempting

I would send him an anonymous letter that reads "I know what you did on that sofa".

I'm just surprised he came back the next day... if I'd had such a mortifying accident, I don't think I would be so cheeky as to return.

When I came back and didn't see his 'rucksack' I really thought he had buggered off shamefaced. But No...

 

[trampledamage]

Not to get into too much detail, but did your sofa smell of pee when you found it the next morning after he'd got up? I'm not suggesting you should have sniffed it or anything () but going by my experience of currently toilet training young master trampledamage, by the next morning it'd be smelling pretty distinctive.

I was just wondering if his lack of shame was down to the fact that he'd done that thing so beloved of sit-com writers and spilled water on himself that looked like he'd peed.

 

[trekkiedane]

A: Should I have made a scene and sent him to the nearest dry-cleaners?
B: Should I have joked about it and left a bottle of spray and a cloth in easy veiw?
C: Should I have did what I did and ignored it and cleaned it up myself ~ thus avoiding embarrassement on both parts.

D: Should have made a joke about it and sent him to the nearest dry-cleaners!

 

[Joshua Howard]

My course of action would be C - to say nothing and take care of it myself.

On second note, I wouldn't invite a potential bed-wetter type into my home with permission to spend the night without doing something to protect the furniture. Actually, I probably wouldn't invite that type over to spend the night in the first place.