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Movie Caption Contest #115: You Broke Your Big Ships

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Khan: "Wait, what are we looking at?"
 
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Kirk: So that's this Mount Doom? Looks awfully high.
Scotty: Aye.
Kirk: And there's no other way to destroy the ring?
McCoy: Apparently not.
Kirk: Well then, let's go and get it over with.

McCoy: I can't carry the ring... but I can carry- shit you are heavy... Jim what the hell did you eat?
 
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"...and a note to Starfleet to whoever granted Counselor Troi helming clearance, they will receive a stern lecturing from Picard, Jean-Luc, Captain, U.S.S. Enterprise, effective immediately."
 
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Data: "Not just those of the counseling profession, but every non-command track officer who ever wanted to pilot a starship, they were all so proud of you! Leading the charge, breaking through that 'glass ceiling,' you were an inspiration to all of them! How could they have possibly known that you were going to so royally fuck it up!
 
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Data: "Awww... Too Bad. You lose. And by crashing the spaceship into the planet, you also forfeit the Golden Phaser. But let's look at what you could have won!"
 
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Kirk: "Yeehaw!!! What a party! Man I got so wasted! Hey we better get the car back to mom and dads before they find it gone. Say where is the car? Oh... there it is..."
 
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Kirk: My porn...
McCoy: My booze...
Scotty: My Twinkies... :(

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Data: In the historic words of Ari Gold 'Let's hug it out bitch.'
 
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Tourist #1: What the hell is that?! [ squints ] What the hell is that? [ chuckling at himself ] What's that danged thing doing here! How did that get here? What the hell is that?! [ squints ] What the hell is that?! How'd that dang deal get here?! [ turns off-camera ] Hey! Come on over here and look at this deal!

[ Tourist #2 wanders onto the set to take a bewildered look ]

Tourist #2: What the hell is that?

Tourist #1: I don't know what the hell that is!

Tourist #2: What in the hell is that?!

Tourist #1: Hey, you kids! Get away from there!

Tourist #2: I would not mess with that thing..

Tourist #1: Don't put your lips on it!

Tourist #2: [ ever curious ] What the hell is this?

Tourist #1: Well.. get a photo of me with it, anyway!

[ Tourist #1 hands camera to Tourist #2, then walks away from camera view to have his picture taken ]

Tourist #2: Be careful with that thing. [ snaps Tourist #1's picture, as spark of ingenuity develops on his face ] Oh, I know what that is!

Tourist #1: [ returns next to Tourist #2 ] Well, what the hell is it?!

Tourist #2: [ looks closer ] What is that thing..?

Tourist #1: I don't even care what it is. [ pause ] What the hell is that?!

Tourist #2: I don't know what the hell that thing is.

Tourist #1: Oh, I know what it is!

Tourist #2: [ seeing it ] Oh, yeah.. oh yeah.. [ chuckles ]

[ Tourist #1 & #2 walk away from the stage. A beat, before their heads peer back into frame, more inquisitive than ever. ]

Tourist #1: What the hell was that?!

[ fade ]

(From and old SNL skit with Steve Martin and Bill Murray)
 
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Kirk: Reminds me of when I rolled my father's antique 'vette into a quarry in Iowa.
McCoy: "Oddly enough, reminds me of when I was a crabby young recruit taking my first shuttle up to my first assignment." *smiles at Kirk* "And some smartass young kid trying to reassure me how safe it was."

Scott: "Reminds me of when I was Simon Pegg..."
 
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Kirk: Reminds me of when I rolled my father's antique 'vette into a quarry in Iowa.
McCoy: "Oddly enough, reminds me of when I was a crabby young recruit taking my first shuttle up to my first assignment." *smiles at Kirk* "And some smartass young kid trying to reassure me how safe it was."

Scott: "Reminds me of when I was Simon Pegg..."

McCoy: "Reminds me of your career, Jim, outside of this franchise I mean"
 
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Kirk: Reminds me of when I rolled my father's antique 'vette into a quarry in Iowa.
McCoy: "Oddly enough, reminds me of when I was a crabby young recruit taking my first shuttle up to my first assignment." *smiles at Kirk* "And some smartass young kid trying to reassure me how safe it was."

Scott: "Reminds me of when I was Simon Pegg..."

McCoy: "Reminds me of your career, Jim, outside of this franchise I mean"
Shatner: "Oh, yeah? Morgan Earp, meet Denny Crane."

Doohan (thinking): "I'd tell them that was a draw...if I wasn't afraid one of 'em might bring up 'Homeboys in Outer Space.'"
 
McCoy: "Oddly enough, reminds me of when I was a crabby young recruit taking my first shuttle up to my first assignment." *smiles at Kirk* "And some smartass young kid trying to reassure me how safe it was."

Scott: "Reminds me of when I was Simon Pegg..."

McCoy: "Reminds me of your career, Jim, outside of this franchise I mean"
Shatner: "Oh, yeah? Morgan Earp, meet Denny Crane."

Doohan (thinking): "I'd tell them that was a draw...if I wasn't afraid one of 'em might bring up 'Homeboys in Outer Space.'"

Nimoy (off-screen): Just say the line, Pippin.
 
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McCoy: What happened?
Kirk: I accidentally said the Self-Destruct code. I thought it would never be said.
McCoy: What is it?
Kirk: "The Phillies are in the World Series."
 
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