"What do you think...?"
"He's a retard..."
"That's the stupidist thing I've ever heard, of course he's a retard but he's like a Ruskie or something"
Movie Caption Contest #111: Blu-Ray Blues - The Voyage Home
- Thread starter Rat Boy
- Start date
- Status
"What do you think...?"
"He's a retard..."
"That's the stupidist thing I've ever heard, of course he's a retard but he's like a Ruskie or something"
Thanks for the multi-quote win! 
Doctor on Left: "Yeah, Pike was my favourite. He did a much better job than Kirk. I mean, Pike was, like...cerebral. All Kirk did was chase green chicks and break computers".
McCoy (quietly): "Easy now, Jim. Don't do anything we'll regret".
Doctor on Left: "Yeah, Pike was my favourite. He did a much better job than Kirk. I mean, Pike was, like...cerebral. All Kirk did was chase green chicks and break computers".
McCoy (quietly): "Easy now, Jim. Don't do anything we'll regret".
Vomit: "Yeah, lost it in a mechanical rice picker. You got anything better?"
Spock: "I died"
"Think these disguises are working Jim?"
"Disguise? Oh shit I forgot my mask!"
"Can ya get outta the way pal, I gotta get Mr Kanye here to his latest award ceremony"
"I'm sorry, Mr. Yelchin. You ain't pass'd the audition for regular character on Enterprise. It was a nice try but yer see, we already got one comedy relief who hails from quite near Georgia. Tell you what, go away and work on that accent a bit more."
"I'm sorry, sir, I must insist you leave this area at once. Unauthorized visitors are not permitted, and traffic has been diverted. There's been an accident".
Guy in Taxi: "Oh, yeah? What happened?"
"Caption Contest 111 has been announced. Deranged Nasat's sense of humour was being carried through, when it rolled off the back of the truck, caught fire and exploded spectacularly. It's rendered the thread unsuitable for commuting, until we can clean this c**p up. It's a mess. Half his jokes don't even make sense."
"Spock? Why is that Tellarite wearing its beard upside down atop its head?"
"Correction, Admiral. That is not a Tellarite"
Kirk: Well, a double-dumb ass on you too!
Cabbie: Sailor, do you know what a double-dumb ass is 'roudn these parts.
Sulu (off-cam): Oh...why hello.
Spock (off-cam): I believe we have found the middle finger we are looking for.
Kirk (off-cam): Quickly, Spock. Snap it off so Doctor McCoy can attach it to Scotty's hand.
Agent 1: Doesn't he look like Paul Raiser?
Agent 2: Would you stop with that already? Seriously.
Doctor Blond: So I passed on Folosom Street Fair this year.
Doctor Brunette: Oh yeah.
Doctor Blond: The gimp had some really bad shellfish and got sick the night before.
Kirk: "Hey, it's Steve McQueen. Are you filming Bullitt?"
Vomit: "I don't know anyone named Grignak. Fuck off."
Twelve Year Old FBI Agent: "He won't talk."
Italian FBI Agent: "I got bolt cutters in my bag."
McCoy: "Jim, your other hair must've traveled through time a little farther back than we did."
CABBIE: "Hey!"
KIRK: "What?"
CABBIE: "Do you have any Grey Poupon?"
Everyone knows about the hand gesture that Vulcans make to accompany the phrase "Live long and prosper." Less well-known is the hand gesture Vulcans make as a way of saying "I want you to render me unconscious and then anally violate me." Unfortunately for Vomit, that gesture was coincidentally exactly the same as the one he gave to Spock...
AGENT ON RIGHT: "Okay, Mr. Chekov, we're almost done here. We just have one last question: How did Khan recognize you on Ceti Alpha V? I mean, seriously, how is that even possible?!"
McCOY (whispering): "My god Jim... I think this doctor is the person who's going to become Patient Zero in a devastating viral outbreak in the twenty-first century! Jim!... Jim? Are you listening?"
KIRK: "That hair would look so good on me..."
"So I opened him up and drilled him right there and then"
"Good thing Sulu ain't here"
Vomit: "Yeah, lost it in a mechanical rice picker. You got anything better?"
Spock: "I died"
That one made me laugh legitimately out loud.
Dr. Blonde: "Dr. Smith had them do nude jumping jacks? What kind of stinking pervert is he?"
Dr. McCoy: Barbaric! When will you cavemen learn the medical value in doing nude jumping jacks during a physical examination?! My god, Jim, this is the Dark Ages!
Thanks for the win!
Cabbie: That'll be 12.50.
Kirk: You didn't give me a ride, you hit me!
Cabbie: And you flew 10 feet. 12.50!
Chekov: I warn you, if you don't lie on the floor I vill have to stun you!
Agent: With my iPhone?
Chekov: Aw crap.
Blonde Doctor: So then House stood on the second floor and yelled to whole hospital that he slept with Cuddy!
Cabbie: That'll be 12.50.
Kirk: You didn't give me a ride, you hit me!
Cabbie: And you flew 10 feet. 12.50!
Chekov: I warn you, if you don't lie on the floor I vill have to stun you!
Agent: With my iPhone?
Chekov: Aw crap.
Blonde Doctor: So then House stood on the second floor and yelled to whole hospital that he slept with Cuddy!
Cabbie: Look at me I'm the frikkin Starship Enterprise over here! Pew pew!
Shatner: I've got to get a bigger budget.
Vhich vun of you is the hotshot maverick, and vhich vun is due to retire in three weeks? I have to know vhich vun of you to shoot.
Vomit: Because they didn't know they both liked pina coladas, that's why! It could happen!
"...and then I managed to pull the gerbal out again"
"Jim, I thought you said Sulu was only getting the huey?"
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