Speaking of the book v. movie difference, I noticed something that was in both. Now the passage says that McCoy picks up on it although the scene in the movie is even more subtle than that.
It's the part when Spock comes back to the bridge after the choke'aKirk scene, when the A-team is having the office meeting about how to position the ship to attack Nero. Spock agrees with Chekov's assessment. Then he has the line of Romulans and "Vulcans share a common ancestery...Also my mother was human, which makes Earth the only home I have left."
At the begining of that speech he's looking at everyone and when he mentions Earth being his home, his eyes swing completely to the edge of the group and he's speaking directly and only to Uhura.
Le sigh.
Yes I noticed it, but they might have emphasized it tad more with the camera. At that point, he's gotten past some remaining bit of resistance to trying to integrate his human half.