TOS Caption Contest #86 - Girl Power

[Outpost4]

This time took a while to judge. That's not the reason for the delay in changing the contest but it's my story and I'm sticking with it.

First off, I'm giving myself a win. I've never done this before, but this is for a unique caption. Not because I thought I wrote a particularly funny one, but because here I killed off Lionel Richie. That is an act that deserves special recognition. Shatmandu just killed off cast members in this contest. Eliminating Lionel Richie is a couple of orders of magnitude better. I mean, anyone can kill Spock. It's been done already, and he's come back.

I've also created a caption contest Hall of Fame, the Mudd Club. It's first member is Shatmandu, specifically for this caption. And what's even better/worse, he may have sunk even lower in a later caption. God bless you, Joe. You're a good man, even if you hide it pretty well.

McCoy regretted offering T'Pau her first pap smear in 175 years ...

OK, now on to our standard winners. Congratulations go out this week to DrBob, Triskelion, Rat Boy and Gertch. That's a real rouges gallery of the regulars around here. Look for them in the lobby of your nearest post office. Rat Boy also deserves special recognition as our first 20 time winner. Congrats, dude.

And in case anybody is interested, the picture that showed up half way through the contest, the one of the Galileo II and the space hippies, came from here. I don't know where I found it as I saved it years ago. It's big and one of my favorite pictures of the shuttlecraft.

Scotty: "ZzzZ z ZzzZz z..."

<whispering>

Spock: "Sssshh!.... Snow White's passed out over here. <poke>
Logically, we should have locked up the mini bar fridge & snackbar with him aboard."

Gaetano: "Dibs on shaving the eyebrows!"

Last time I do a cavity search of Mr Spock. I never did find my whistle.

Sulu: "When I said we dropped the tranny, that isn't what I meant. Why must everything be sexual with you people?"

Everyone had to wait for Spock to finish peeing behind a bush, and another bush.

We also have a photoshop winner, with NCC-1701 and M'Sharak combining for this gem.

Chekov: Zoinks!
McCoy: Ruh-roh!

For our next contest, we have a strong woman, a horny man and a contraption. The Galileo exhaust pic went so well, I'm going to try another bonus caption with no people in it. The picture of the device is not from Trek Core. I found this particular screen cap in another gallery that seems to be off line right now. If it comes back, I'll post a link. I took the picture and processed it a bit. The original was dark and I gave it some spark. Here is the HD version, tweaked.

I can hardly wait to see what you perverts do with a bossy woman.



TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

26138
A Beaker Full Of Death (2x)
Adam Ihle (4x)
AlphaTrionTJW
ancient
Bad Atom (2x)
Battrekker
cakes516
CaptainJon
Classic Fan
commodore64
cooleddie74 (12x)
cultcross
DeafPoet
Defcon
Diesel Micky Dolenz (6x)
DrBob (6x)

Plus one this time for a total of 7!
DS9Sega (4x)
EliyahuQeoni (2x)
FishDS9
galleywest (4x)
Gertch (15x)

Plus one this time for a total of 16!
goldbug
Guartho
Haggis and Tatties
Hambone (2x)
Jackson_Roykirk
J. Allen (2x)
jayrath
jptrekker
Kahloke
Kegek (2x)
KJM
Mallory (2x)
MGagen
Mojochi
M'Sharak (6x)

Plus one this time for a total of 7!
NCC-1701 (3x)

Plus one this time for a total of 4!
Nerys Myk (14x)
Noname Given
Outpost4 (12x)

Plus one this time for a total of 13!
Quo Vadimus
Rat Boy (19x)

Plus one this time for a total of 20!
Redfern
SciFi75 (3x)
scottydog (14x)
Shatmandu (8x)

Sir Rhosis (2x)
T'Bonz (7x)
terranova
Tharpdevenport (3x)
The Castellan
The Cutest of Borg
The Laughing Vulcan (9x)
The Old Mixer
The Squire of Gothos (8x)
The Tone (2x)
TigerOfDarkness (2)
Tim M (3x)
Triskelion (3x)

Plus one this time for a total of 4!
Tristan
Turbo
vassa
Woulfe (3x)

Mudd Club

 

[Outpost4]

"That's Mistress Tamura to you, bitch."

On this shipment to the Enterprise, there was obviously more bourbon than scotch.

Engineering knew better than to let Scotty's stil break down.

 

[cooleddie74]

MEA 3:"Is this an example of what you Earthmen call 'Hot Girl-on-Asian Action'? I must say, I have YET to be impressed."

Mid-23rd century transporter designs were known for emitting awkward 'Stupid Face Rays' which were not harmful in small doses but could turn an officer into a complete, vacuous idiot over the course of many years of exposure.

"Mister Scott's going to love the new Kool-Aid bong we made for him!!"

 

[Diesel Micky Dolenz]

Spock (thinking): It is illogical for the captain to feel that McCoy has a "prettier mouth" than me.

The final straw for Grace Lee Whitney was when she "tried out" one of the props that Shatner had jokingly labeled the "Orgasmitron 5000."

 

[cooleddie74]

"You two men need to get offship more often. I keep telling the Captain the two of you are going to rape the transporter sooner or later."

 

[Rat Boy]

Miko Mayama: "Well, I hope this means I get to guest star in more episodes."

Barbara Babcock: "Dream on. I'll be lucky if they'll let me do voice-overs."

The FSO tour of '67 had three Playmates of the Stardate as entertainment.

Scotty: "We're in the bloody 23rd Century and we still have to change the oil every 50,000 miles!"

 

[EliyahuQeoni]

"Well, all we need now is a cup..."

 

[cooleddie74]

"Make ONE move, lady and I strip nude and ride you like a bucking bronco."

"The old transporter effects aren't THAT amusing, gentlemen!"

"Let's fix this ourselves, Ensign.

Scotty's never going to spot a thousand credits for a proper tune-up at Jupiter Station."

 

[Rat Boy]

"Well, all we need now is a cup..."

Mea 3: "Let's just get this over with."

 

[cooleddie74]

"Make one move for that door...and I'll beehive your ass, sista."

 

[Nerys Myk]

MEA 3: Yeah great pose, but I dont think the world is ready for a Japanese Wonder Woman.

SCOTTY: Oops I forgot to beam up T'Pring's clothes.
MCCOY: So the drapes do match the carpets.
SPOCK: I hate you both.

SCOTTY: Assembly Instructions? I don't need any bloody instructions!!!! If it don't fit toss it the pile.

 

[EliyahuQeoni]

The seldom seen Star Fleet Plumbers.

 

[Maurice]

The plumbing for the head in Spock's quarters finally arrived...but those who installed it demanded combat pay.

 

[cooleddie74]

MEA 3: "Well either kill me or make sensual Asian love to my nubile Eminian body. One or the other!"

SCOTTY:"Ain't she a beaut..."

McCOY:"You said it."

SPOCK:"It's just a cargo container with two round protuberances near the top. You gentlemen need to go on shore leave STAT."

"100 Proof?

More like 100 to the THIRD POWER, Crewman! This stuff will fry your retinas and send you back in time to Depression Era Earth!"

 

[M'Sharak]

Ho, easy wi' that, laddie! Lean in a little too close there, and ye'll end up
gettin' sucked right into th' tube. It's na' pleasant at all, I can assure ye!"

 

[Captain Kate]

"It's no good, sir. Without sticky-backed plastic she isnae gonna hold!"

 

[John Picard]

Scotty: "Cap'n, as soon as I can adapt the Mr Fusion to provide power in place of the damaged Warp Core we should be underway."

 

[scottydog]

Quartermaster: "One credit card receipt, made out to Austin Powers...."

 

[scottydog]

Spock (thinking): "Odd. Goosing him should not have produced that reaction."

 

[Outpost4]

Spock: Fascinating. I would have thought he was too old to believe in Santa Claus.