“PROFIT AND LACE”
“
Oh dear, Moogie just read the script for this episode.”
Thank goodness
that’s over. I’m just glad to get this atrocious episode out the way. I did endeavour to rewatch it with an open mind, in the hope it won’t be QUITE as bad as I recall. But, no. I don’t think it’s even a matter of not ageing well and seeming more offensive in today’s more socially aware and sensitive culture; this episode was abysmal back when it aired and it’s abysmal now.
To be fair, things start off reasonably well. The story advances a loose arc that has spanned much of the series; namely the stirrings of a revolution on Ferenginar with regard to feeeemale rights. It seems only right that since Zek and Ishka became an item that Moogie’s progressive streak would soon work its way into Ferengi policy and legislature. That’s nice to see, and if this episode has anything going for it, it’s the wonderful chemistry between the actors in this wacky extended family. There’s also one genuinely funny moment, set in Ops, where Quark and Rom fret over a communications blackout with Ferenginar. What if the Dominion has invaded Ferenginar, they wonder? “Think of the terrible repercussions to the Alpha Quadrant,” cries Rom. “I cannot think of ANY,” chips in a deadpan Worf. The delivery and the fact Worf is in the background of the scene make it all the more hilarious. Unfortunately, they should have called it a day at that point, because it’s probably the only joke that works in the entire episode.
I really don’t know what was up with the writers at this point, because, in spite of a couple of bona fide classics that easily rank in the show’s top five best episodes, the overall quality of writing has, by this point, become patchy at best, to downright abysmal here. I genuinely loved a lot of the show’s previous Ferengi outings, and gave the previous one, “The Magnificent Ferengi” full marks. This, however, is rotten to the core, and I think it all pretty much comes down to a terrible, terrible script. It doesn’t help that the tone is odd and uneven, apparently because while Ira Behr intended to play it for laughs, director Alexander Siddig and some of the cast wanted to play it straight. Alas, this episode was never going to win either way, because it’s an outright failure both as a drama and a comedy.
I still find it astonishing that an episode which is about women’s emancipation could be so deeply, despicably misogynistic. The opening scene features Quark sexually exploiting a Dabo girl named Allura; something that’s been hinted at before back in the first season, but a trait I’d assumed the character had outgrown. It’s bad enough that this abuse is played for laughs; but then the closing scene reveals that Allura actually seems to be INTO it, implying that if you harass a woman enough she’ll happily give in because they’re all basically gagging for it. I was reminded of the moment in TOS’s “The Enemy Within”, when Spock smirks that Janice Rand secretly enjoyed being sexually assaulted by Kirk’s double. That was bad enough in the 1960’s, but was sadly reflective of the backward views of the time. This episode, however, was made over thirty years later and even in the late 1990’s, that was wholly unacceptable.
I think that’s part of the problem. The crude, retrograde humour feels like a relic of the 1970’s rather than the 90’s; back when the mere thought of a man dressing as a woman was automatically deemed “hilarious” because the very idea was considered demeaning and comical. While drag has been around for considerable time, it’s worth noting that a drag artist is never the brunt of the joke; but rather they command the narrative and wield the jokes like weapons. That never happens here. We just get continual digs about how women are overly emotional, hormonal and generally inept as anything other than sex objects. I know that’s Ferengi culture for you, but it doesn’t even work as a parody of Ferengi women, because the two Ferengi female we’ve met on the show, Ishka and Pel, happened to be perhaps the two most competent and shrewd Ferengi businesspeople ever seen on the show.
Transgender Quark was obviously meant to be a laughter riot, but all I could do was grimace throughout. The writing was woefully unfunny, unsubtle and downright offensive to anyone with half a braincell. Armin Shimmerman does his best and plays it in earnest, but you can see he doesn’t believe in the material, and I also feel sorry for Alexander Siddig, whose career as a director most probably died here. It was telling he never got another shot at directing the show, and the producers went on record levelling some of the blame for this episode on him. It’s admittedly not a great directorial effort overall—the scene where the camera hangs on a curtain for several painfully long seconds and all we hear are the sound effects of Nilva chasing Lumba around off camera is utterly
excruciating.
Most of the fault, however, has to be pinned on the scripting. The episode fails as a comedy because it’s woefully unfunny. When you add offensive to the mix, you have a truly loathsome combination. Let’s be clear, the comedic climax is essentially a rape gag. Then, when Brunt shows up, Quark/Lumba only gets out of the predicament by disrobing and revealing his/her genitalia. By that point, I was totally embarrassed to be watching. I also had to wonder why Bashir was so ready to gender-reassign Quark for what was clearly a scam. Although this
is the doctor who was readily willing to remove Bareil’s brain and organs, not to mention Kurn’s entire memory and personality. Why the heck was it necessary to change Quark’s entire physiology in the first place rather than just giving him the temporary appearance of female lobes and breasts? Ugh, I can’t believe I’m even giving this shit a modicum of serious thought.
“Profit and Lace” is just utter dreck; unquestionably the lowest low of seven seasons of DS9, and one of the absolute worst episodes of Star Trek ever filmed. It’s horribly written, cringe-worthy, offensive and blatantly unfunny. I remember hating it back when the show first aired and I hate it just as much, if not more, now. It gets one point for advancing the Ferengi arc and Worf’s one-liner, otherwise it would have been into minus figures.
Rating: 1
Your use of that line in this review has just vindicated "Valiant"'s existence for me. A despisable episode.
