I guess I'm up for the duration. Funny...I haven't gotten a full night's sleep in over a week, but I'm not tired at all and it's 2:30 in the morning right now.
I've been thinking on this.
I wish I had a box. I wish there was a box, any box that I fit in. All I've ever wanted to be was "normal"...whatever normal is. I wish I could fit in...anywhere.
And please understand that I'm not making one of those "Welcome to the club" replies. Whenever I post something about wishing I was "normal", the most normal people I've ever met always give just that as a reply: "Welcome to the club."
Sure, some of them may have depression. Some may be a little more artistic, but I'm off in some other world, some other universe. I just do not belong anywhere, certainly not on this planet at this time.
I'm a pragmatist, but my feet never touch the ground.
I'm an absolute pacifist in reality, but I'm always thinking violent thoughts.
I try to help...any chance I get. I always make the situation worse.
I often wonder if I'm on the autistic spectrum and then I think, "no, you're just trying to claim something that doesn't belong to you." Same with many other spectra, as it were.
I'm always looking for my answers and they never come.
I wish my brain functioned more "normally" i.e. like other peoples' around me. It's so rare that I can find someone who thinks and feels the way I do (about any variety of topics and subjects) that I've almost forgotten what it feels like to be connected to another person. The last person I felt this connection with (if you don't count my adoptive mother) was my second best friend who passed away in April. That left more of a void than I was prepared for (or even anticipated). At least my actual BFF is still among the living (though we do not see eye-to-eye on many, many social and other issues I still love her dearly).
Sorry, that's probably too much randomness for this thread... just had to get it off my chest. carry on!![]()
I've been thinking on this.
I wish I had a box. I wish there was a box, any box that I fit in. All I've ever wanted to be was "normal"...whatever normal is. I wish I could fit in...anywhere.
And please understand that I'm not making one of those "Welcome to the club" replies. Whenever I post something about wishing I was "normal", the most normal people I've ever met always give just that as a reply: "Welcome to the club."
Sure, some of them may have depression. Some may be a little more artistic, but I'm off in some other world, some other universe. I just do not belong anywhere, certainly not on this planet at this time.
I'm a pragmatist, but my feet never touch the ground.
I'm an absolute pacifist in reality, but I'm always thinking violent thoughts.
I try to help...any chance I get. I always make the situation worse.
I often wonder if I'm on the autistic spectrum and then I think, "no, you're just trying to claim something that doesn't belong to you." Same with many other spectra, as it were.
I'm always looking for my answers and they never come.