The title says it all. Post a really bad Star Trek joke. I'll kick it off...
Discovery came out in '17. Enterprise came out in '01.
'17, '01
Discovery came out in '17. Enterprise came out in '01.
'17, '01
Insert Bad Star Trek Joke Here
- Thread starter Lord Garth
- Start date
How many ears do Vulcans have?
Three. A left ear, a right ear and a final front ear.
Three. A left ear, a right ear and a final front ear.
What do the starship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common?
They both circle Uranus wiping out Klingons.
Oldie, but a goody, with lots of variants.
They both circle Uranus wiping out Klingons.
Oldie, but a goody, with lots of variants.
(quoted from vague memory)The Star Trek: The Motion Picture Happy Meal said:
A Ferengi, a Klingon, and a Borg walk into a bar...
Few people got it wrong and told some good ones...
Kardashians and Cardassians have a surprising amount in common. Both are leather-skinned tyrants bent on planetary domination. But at least Cardassians are clever.
"We'll skip the court-martial this time."
You must be joking. Bwahahaa, got it?
Now that's a bad joke right there!
But it's not a Star Trek one, so I'll make up one on the spot:
What did Picard say when he had to go to the toilet while on the bridge?
"Number One, I'll go and take number two."
And here's another gem I came up with...
What did Tasha say in 'The Naked Now' when Data couldn't perform sexually?
"Insufficient Data."
"Beam me up, Scotty. There's no sign of intelligent life," Captain Kirk said while looking up a computer with a website titled "Trek BBS" displayed on the monitor.
What do you call a date with Geordi?
A blind date!
Jason
A blind date!
Jason
Beavis and Butt-Head made a similar joke in their TNG parody (in "Dream On"):
Captain Butt-Head: "Number One, I order you to go take a number two."
Commander Beavis: "Aye aye, Captain."
Commander Beavis: "Aye aye, Captain."
What did Spock find in Kirk's toilet?
The Captain's Log!
The Captain's Log!
Q: What spreadsheet software do the Borg use?
A: Locutus 1-2-3
Q: What software do the Borg use to tally wives of assimilation victims?
A: Locutus 1-2-3 for Widows
Q: Why did the Borg cross the road?
A: Standing there was futile.
Q: What do you call a Borg with no arms and no legs?
A. An Appliance.
Q: What do you call a person who becomes a cyborg, is patched up
and made organic, becomes a cyborg again, and gets religion?
A: A Borg again Christian.
Q: How many Borg does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: All of them.
Q: How many Borg does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Illumination is irrelevant.
Q: What's the Borg's favorite PBS show?
A: This Old Collective Conscience
A: Locutus 1-2-3
Q: What software do the Borg use to tally wives of assimilation victims?
A: Locutus 1-2-3 for Widows
Q: Why did the Borg cross the road?
A: Standing there was futile.
Q: What do you call a Borg with no arms and no legs?
A. An Appliance.
Q: What do you call a person who becomes a cyborg, is patched up
and made organic, becomes a cyborg again, and gets religion?
A: A Borg again Christian.
Q: How many Borg does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: All of them.
Q: How many Borg does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Illumination is irrelevant.
Q: What's the Borg's favorite PBS show?
A: This Old Collective Conscience
C
C57D
Guest
1. How many (TOS) Roms does it take to change a lighting panel?
One hundred and one. One to change the panel and a hundred to blow up the ship for the shame of failure!
2. How many Klingons does it take to change a lighting panel?
Two. One to change the panel and the other to kill him and take the glory!
3. How many TNG crew does it take to change a lighting panel?
One, but he first needs to reverse the negative polarity of the annular quantum photonic sink.
One hundred and one. One to change the panel and a hundred to blow up the ship for the shame of failure!
2. How many Klingons does it take to change a lighting panel?
Two. One to change the panel and the other to kill him and take the glory!
3. How many TNG crew does it take to change a lighting panel?
One, but he first needs to reverse the negative polarity of the annular quantum photonic sink.
What do you call a Tellerite when he is sleeping?
A Pig in the blanket.
What would you call Rom if he got pointed ears?
A ROMulan.
What do you call Dr McCoy when he dies?
Bones
What would you say to Wesley Crusher if he became a Nazi?
Shut up Wesley!
Jason
A Pig in the blanket.
What would you call Rom if he got pointed ears?
A ROMulan.
What do you call Dr McCoy when he dies?
Bones
What would you say to Wesley Crusher if he became a Nazi?
Shut up Wesley!
Jason
How many Betazoid counselors does it take to change a lighting panel?
Only one, but the lighting panel must really want to change.
How many good old country doctors does it take to change a lighting panel?
"Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor, not an engineer!"
Only one, but the lighting panel must really want to change.
How many good old country doctors does it take to change a lighting panel?
"Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor, not an engineer!"
"There was a young lady from Venus, whose body was shaped like a--"
https://www.rhymezone.com/r/rhyme.cgi?typeofrhyme=perfect&loc=dmapi2&Word=venus
https://www.rhymezone.com/r/rhyme.cgi?typeofrhyme=perfect&loc=dmapi2&Word=venus
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