Spoilers Describe a novel terribly

[hbquikcomjamesl]

I liked E:TFA enough to trade up to the book club hardcover. And to apply a dust jacket wrapper.

Oh, and "CorporalCaptain": Are you any relation to a Maj. Major Major Major?

Kirk and Co. poke their noses somewhere they're not wanted, after being warned not to, and get roughed up by a superbeing (more-or-less every other Bantam novel from Gordon Eklund's November 1978 The Starless World on).

The Enterprise is depicted as barely big enough for a crew of a dozen, with rocket exhaust streaming from the warp nacelles (just about any ST comic book from the Gold Key era).

 

[Hardtarget]

Taran'atar is on the warpath. (Warpath)

ahaha, that was underrated. Got a good laugh out of me anyways.

 

[Captain Clark Terrell]

Kirk/Seven of Nine. (No Time Like the Past)

Brown chicken, brown cow.

 

[Timewalker]

Uhura's guitar strings keep breaking. (Mission to Horatius)

 

[CorporalCaptain]

Oh, and "CorporalCaptain": Are you any relation to a Maj. Major Major Major?

He's from a competing franchise.

 

[hbquikcomjamesl]

Brown chicken, brown cow.

How now?

 

[Saul]

Zombie Borg Kirk beats the crap out of Worf (The Return)

Stardrive Vs Saucer! (Rogue Saucer)

Kirk's Son likes to pick his nose. (Captain's Glory)

These AREN'T the Voyages... (The Good That Men Do)

 

[Hey Missy]

30% movie, 70% other! (TWOK, TSFS and TVH novelizations)
Picard really wishes he was Kirk (most Peter David TNG novels)
Most of the characters die at the end (every David Mack novel)

Tom Paris gets taken in, mind controlled or tempted by a beautiful alien woman (I can't give you exact titles but it seemed like it was every other Voyager novel in the numbered series).
Voyager is in need of food and the perfect planet is harboring a terrible secret. (See above all though in fairness they moved away from this trope later on)

As someone who read every numbered Voyager novel, this is very true, especially the latter. And the author will spend one or two pages describing alien vegetables.

 

[20fridge]

Calhoun pretends he's James Bond. Picard is not amused. (Double Helix: Double or Nothing)

 

[T'Ressa Dax]

Everyone forgets it happened and Geordi isn't a captain after all. (Indistinguishable from Magic)

 

[BobtheGunslinge]

Everyone pretends Kruge was a good character, and it almost starts a war.

 

[Captain Clark Terrell]

Khan discovers Ceti Alpha V has no covfefe.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Quentin Tarantino writes Trek. (A Gutted World)

Look, everyone! I can make Voyager perfect and here's how! (Places of Exile)

No, I don't know what the hell this title means either. (Obsidian Alliances)

 

[Timewalker]

Sulu transfers off the Enterprise and gets a really awful-looking moustache. (The Entropy Effect)

 

[20fridge]

Sulu transfers off the Enterprise, then comes back after receiving suitable character development. Kirk gets sick of Archer being the first captain to encounter TNG era races and takes matters into his own hands. (Allegiance in Exile)

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha. (Demons)

 

[BobtheGunslinge]

Khan discovers Ceti Alpha V has no covfefe.

That was also a movie.

Revenge is a dish best served covfefe.

 

[JWolf]

Sorry to break the game for a moment, but I have to ask, is Enterprise: The First Adventure really as insane as it sounds?

It's not all that good. I didn't care for it.

 

[JWolf]

It didn't happen (Fallen Gods)

 

[F. King Daniel]

It's not all that good. I didn't care for it.

I liked it, although it's certainly an odd one.