KIrk: I had a weird dream last night...
McCoy: Who was she?
Kirk: Not that kind of dream. I dreamed you were someone named Urban...
McCoy: Keith Urban?
Kirk:....Okay. Let's go with that.
Contest: ENTER Movies Caption Contest #261: What's going on here?
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KIrk: I had a weird dream last night...
McCoy: Who was she?
Kirk: Not that kind of dream. I dreamed you were someone named Urban...
McCoy: Keith Urban?
Kirk:....Okay. Let's go with that.
KIRK: "Sulu, come on, you got to see this. Karplotsky's used the ship's computer to alter Chekov's personnel photos."
SULU: "I'm a bit busy here, sir."
KIRK: "She gave him a mohawk."
SULU: "On my way."
CHEKOV: "Cut it out, Keptin. I'm not the "new kid" anymore."
Kirk: Sulu, emergency course change! Stand by for maximum warp!
Sulu: Heading, sir?
Kirk: Straight to Starbucks! Pumpkin Spice Lattes are back!
Chekov: "Captain there is a swarm of hundreds of small ships heading towards us from the planet.
Kirk: "Sulu, casually take us to warp.
"Sulu: "We're at warp captain and have easily out run the swarm."
Kirk: "You know, it would have taken a real idiot of a captain to have just sat there and let that swarm ram his ship."
The entire bridge crew laughs.
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McCoy: What's the matter, Jim?
Kirk: My American Express card... I think I left home without it.
McCoy: "Jim, stop that! No, you did not just find the toilet and that is not the 'captain's log'!"
SPOCK: "Captain, I know you are an incurable egotist, but must you photobomb all of my bridge selfies?"
KIRK: "Spock..."
SPOCK: "Seriously, sir; was it your sincere impression that I would not take notice?"
KIRK: "No, it's not that. I just never thought I'd ever hear you use the words "photobomb" and "selfie"."
Spock: "Attention cadets, now that Admiral Kirk has exited the bridge toilet, you will only have to wait five point seven minutes with the exhaust fans at full power before it is marginally inhabitable again and the next of you can use it.
Saavik: "I didn't realize he would be in there for so long."
Spock: "The fact that the Admiral took a book with him should have lead you to the obvious conclusion."
MCCOY: "I've told him before, "if you want to quit the stuff, come to me, Jim. I'll give you something for it." But no, Space Cadet Kirk here tries self-hypnosis after reading an article online about how easy it is. He's been like that for hours...snap out of it, Jim!"
KIRK: (no sound, doesn't blink)
MCCOY: *sigh*
Spock: Now you're standing upright and you're holding a book under your left arm.
Kirk: That's uncanny! I think you're ready for the talent show.
Kirk: Tag, you're it!
Sulu: Damn it! I hate that game!
Kirk: Bones, I am sorry but I just drank the last of the Scotch!
McCoy: Damn it, Jim! I am a doctor not a teetotaller!
Kirk: Bones, I am sorry but I just drank the last of the Scotch!
McCoy: Damn it, Jim! I am a doctor not a teetotaller!
Scotty: Ye cannae be serious cap'n!
Kirk: Bones, I am sorry but I just drank the last of the Scotch!
McCoy: Damn it, Jim! I am a doctor not a teetotaller!
Chekov: There is plenty of wodka left, doctor.
McCoy: Pay attention, Chekov! What'd I just say!
KIRK: "SPIDER!!"
SULU: "Not fooling anybody, sir."
KIRK: *Mumble grumble*
CHEKOV: "Bright idea, Keptin. Instead of trying to give helmsman a heart attack, perhaps take look at enormous black hole out viewscreen."
KIRK: *scoffs* "Black hole? Right. Sure."
CHEKOV: "Famous last vords..."
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
McCoy: Are you just going to sit there while this contest rolls through Halloween?
Kirk: Calm yourself doctor. I have an epic post idea involving an old laxative commercial.
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