Contest: ENTER Voyager Caption Contest #158 Trek Tech
- Thread starter Catarina
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I've been trying to think of a Gimli joke for days.
da Gimli: I cannot jump the distance, you'll have to toss me. Dont tell the elf...er...Vulcan.
Tuvok: Shouldn't you be shorter?
Torres Reading her iPadd, "What do you mean they've moved Voyager from the 2364 - 2378 subforum to the Crap - Crap subforum?"
Torres: Torres to Paris. I'm in Engineering, and I just accessed a gel pack I found under your bed. Care to explain what a "Playboy" is?
Paris: Cmon B'Elanna, it's a 20th century classic....
Torres: well, it was a classic. Now it's just deleted.
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These new Dr. Scholls gel packs make the consoles feel soooo good. I could tap buttons for hours!
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Doctor: Just lay still, this won't hurt a bit.
Patient: That's what you said last time.
Doctor: "Ah, ensign Nobody, how are you? I see you've seriously injured yourself. But don't worry -- two years ago I chose between ensign Jetal and ensign Kim and chose Mr. Kim because he was a friend, but I think I've corrected my programming and you're my only patient right now."
Tuvok: "Tuvok to Sick Bay, emergency medical transport in progress. Ensign Kim has hurt himself again since he was passed up on for promotion again. He's critical."
Doctor: "Sorry, ensign Nobody, gotta go!"
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Sinter Klaas: Catalina, I must get to Spain. The Dutch will be expecting me.
Tuvok: Captain, this tricorder is merely a box with glowing lights. It does not function as a tool.
Janeway: Damn these budget shortcuts!
NEELIX: Do I really have to lie motionless in this thing the rest of my life?
DOCTOR: No. I'm just doing a favor for the rest of the crew.
An awkward moment when Janeway realizes she turned off the 'Realistic 16th century attitude toward gender' setting on the Leonardo Davinci program but not the 'Realistic 16th century attitude toward race' setting.
Chakotay scans the immediate area for signs of life, and is puzzled when he doesn't detect himself.
When repairing the Delta Flyer after the explosion, B'elana realizes she has the perfect opportunity to destroy Tom's retro cassette player and say it was destroyed in the attack.
EMH: Don't worry ensign, I've been specifically designed for surgery with my eyes closed
EMH: Good news, ensign! Your insurance has agreed to pay 80% of the cost of this procedure. Before we begin the surgery to re-attach your arms, please sign this statement agreeing to pay the remainder.
``My incubator's hatching! Oh, look at all those adorable little baby incubators! ... Oh no, that one's a little preemie, I'm going to have to put it in the ... OK, this just got creepy.''
Janeway: ``Hold it ... here's Leonardo da Vinci. Here's a Vulcan. We're in the Phantom Prince of Krankor's space lair. Richard Diamond, Private Detective, is sneaking down the stairs toward us ... yes! This is all coming together exactly like I planned!''
``Marsh melons? Ha ha ha ha ha no, of course not. Here, have some fresh-dispensed Reese's Components.''
``I'll teach you to freeze up with my Fleetwood Mac eight-track in you.''
Janeway: Maestro, sorry to break this to you, but you are in the 24th century, you're not really Leonardo. You and your workshop are just... Elaborate tricks of light.
DaVinci: Maybe So... But that does not change one simple fact. You owe me 3 months back rent on your corner of the shop.
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DaVinci: 800 years into the future! And you mean in all that time there hasn't been another Caption Contest?!!
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