Voyager Caption Contest #135: On Location

[Gil T.Azell]

Miss Q: "Whisper, whisper whisper"

Q "Oh so that's the shocker, You naughty 'Q' "

 

[Finn]

Conn Officer's Log: Five hours more until I break it to Tuvok that we have been on the holodeck the whole time. Harry owes me a week worth of replicator rations.

 

[Catarina]

Miss Q: Might I suggest the Chinese Finger Trap?

 

[Catarina]

Whoops, forgot my other idea :-)

CARETAKER: Release your hand from my shoulder! You're like those borg- I won't be assimilated into your Voyager collective!

 

[Nebusj]

Voyager: ``Hey! Hey guys! Guys? Are you going somewhere? Where are you going? Can I come with you where you're going? I can come with you, right? Where are you gonna go? Is it to the pizza place? Mommy said I can come with you if you're just going to pizza. If you're going to the pizza place it's okay if I come along, right? Because Mommy said I can cross at the lights now and there's two lights to the pizza place, so you don't even have to hold my hand or anything. If you wait a second I can come with you and I even have some money for the games. If you hold up I bet Mommy'll give me money for my own pizza too, so there's no reason I can't come with you. I can come with you, right? Guys? Guys, can I come where you're going? I can come where you're going if you wait for me a second. Guys? Where are you going? Can I come? I can come if you let me. What're you gonna do when you get there? Is it something I can do too? I bet I can do it wherever you're going. Guys? Can I come? Guys? Guys? Hey?''

 

[tharpdevenport]

Chacotay: "Okay everybody, let's remember where we parked. Ha. Always wanted to say that."

Tuvok: "Commander, my tricorder readings are not detecting any funny."

 

[Hutchy01]

.

Miss Q: Might I suggest treating it like a Chinese Finger Trap?

 

[Karzak]

Chacotay: "Okay everybody, let's remember where we parked. Ha. Always wanted to say that."

Tuvok: "Commander, my tricorder readings are not detecting any funny."

CHAKOTAY: That's because you're holding your tricorder incorrectly, Tuvok. You've got it pointing at tharpdevenport's captions...

 

[tharpdevenport]

Chacotay: "Okay everybody, let's remember where we parked. Ha. Always wanted to say that."

Tuvok: "Commander, my tricorder readings are not detecting any funny."

CHAKOTAY: That's because you're holding your tricorder incorrectly, Tuvok. You've got it pointing at tharpdevenport's captions...

Tuvok: "Commander, I believe I have foudn the source of destruction in the Karzakian system: pumpkin spice."

 

[Triskelion]

Tuvok: Funny, like pon farr, is in the eye of the beholder, Spiderchaser.
Paris: Yes, master.
Tuvok: Misery loves company, but Mister Furley loves Three's Company, Spiderchaser.
Paris: Yes, Master.
Tuvok: Thank you very much. You've been great. As a matter of fact I'd like to take you home with me. Unfortunately I took the last audience home and there's no more room. Boom, boom.
Paris: Master?
Tuvok: Sorry, that one came from a mind meld with history's greatest stand up comic.
Paris: Joe Piscopo?
Tuvok: Who else, Spiderchaser? Now run along and fetch us a spritzer, I'm schvitzing like a Malon core laborer in a solar flare over here!

 

[stardream]

Lizard babies with her helm boy?

 

[Smellincoffee]

Janeway: I want the coffee and I want it now.

Paris: Remind me to send a note to Starfleet requesting light-colored away uniforms for visiting tropical and arid planets, Tuvok. Even the Nazis had sense to switch from Ominous Grey to tan in the desert.

Old Man Hatfield: You ain't one of them McCoy witches, are ya?

 

[Catarina]

My helper did an excellent job. And what do you know, he picked the winners I would have. Lead head, I think I will take up your offer to use your awards. They're bright, clever and well..cool.

I'm baaaack. (Time to do captions, I mean) Btw, if you didn't know, I welcome image submissions. Just pm me a link.

 

[Karzak]

CHAKOTAY: Keep your eyes peeled, Tuvok. We need to find LeadHead and soon if we want to start the next Caption Contest. But we can't do it without him.
TUVOK: Tricorder readings inconclusive, Commander...

JANEWAY: I'm Captain Kathryn Janeway of the starship Voyager. We're looking for a friend ours. His name is LeadHead. This caption thread has been going on for weeks. We'd like to start another one.
THE CARETAKER: Not enough time. NOT ENOUGH TIME!

PARIS: Been a pretty rough search, eh Tuvok?
TUVOK: Mr. Paris. Your attempts at congeniality aside, I regret to inform you... I do not believe LeadHead will return and we will be stranded here for some time.

SHE-Q: Did you hear? Tuvok thinks LeadHead isn't coming back.
Q: The marvel! The audacity of LeadHead. Here is a poster who is truly irrepressible!

CREW: (watching, waiting, commisserating.)
KIM: I see him! It's LeadHead! (cries)

 

[Nerys Myk]

CREW: (watching, waiting, commisserating.)
KIM: I see him! It's LeadHead! (cries)

CHAKOTAY: I don't know, he's illusive, man.

 

[Triskelion]

Tom: "Get the Lead out"?
Tuvok: No.
Tom: "Where there's smoke, there's Leadhead"?
Tuvok: That is even worse.
Tom: "The mass of men Lead lives of quiet desperation?"
Tuvok: Too far a stretch.
Tom: Leave you alone, before you're on me like a Gorn on a cupcake?
Tuvok: That's the one.

 

[tharpdevenport]

"Remember the other night, that hot and steamy evening? You might want to get tested."

"This is highly confidential, just between us two, but Mrs. Janeway told me ensign Horton is talking to a Q!"

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Q: Thanks for getting all that earwax out, babe.

 

[Drob]

Q: Ha! It's the old superglue-in-the-ear trick we Q enjoy.
J: Mmow mbout mi pmnch mou min mhe mick mon stmop, mmmkay?

 

[tharpdevenport]

"I hear they're not gonna pick winners..."