It might seem easy to dismiss the small, everyday graces. It's a lot harder to do after you've had visions. Mind you, this is not something that happens frequently to me, not something I ask for, nor is it something I "profit" from in any manner (i.e. I am not some sort of clairvoyant). I do not indulge in drugs, mind-altering substances, alcohol, or cigarettes (and unfortunately even had to stop with the coffee thanks to stomach problems), so that's not a factor. I also know what lucid dreaming feels like, as well as a number of hypnogogic and other semi-conscious states, and this did not line up at all with them as far as the feel, the mental awareness, the coherence of the scenario, and a number of other things. But, I've had some experiences that were of such a degree of power that I simply cannot ignore them. In the most powerful case, there is even the possibility that I nearly died. And what happened to me then, what I saw, what I felt, what I was on the verge of becoming...I just cannot walk away from that.
Nor can I walk away from the immense beauty of the natural world and the way in which it was designed. To study math and science is a transcendent experience, and I mean that. During the period in my life when I was not going to church and I was experiencing very severe doubts...all I can say is that to be in the classroom then, studying those things, was like being in the most wonderful cathedral imaginable. It still is. Whoever came up with that title "The Cold Equations"...don't let your algebra teacher fool you. They were wrong. Calculus sure isn't cold or void. It's hard to explain how, but there is amazing divine warmth in it and my grades might not always have been the best, but when I was listening to the lectures, there was so much LIFE in it that engaging the material became an act of prayer. The same goes for the study of ANY science, to include evolutionary science, quantum physics, and cosmology--all those supposedly "troublesome" sciences. Studying these will restore one's sense of wonder and awe at the magnitude of Creation and Creator in a heartbeat.