What does "Closed" mean to you?

[Mistral]

I'm with the OP. 17 years of retail/fast food management and I have more horror stories than you can shake a stick at. Like the lady who threw the burrito at me because she said no onions and it had onions. The guy who pulled an Uzi on my graveyard cashier when he refused to give him free food. The lady who scrounged $17 dollars in change from her car in my drive through for an $18 order, then told me to take the difference out of a $20 bill. When I worked at Borders Books clearing the store was the worst part of the night. Not cleaning it-clearing it. I'd start making intercom announcements 1/2 hour before close, then every ten minutes and still people would ignore this and have to be asked to leave. Some of them were a lot of fun. There was the guy who got so angry I had to call the police for fear of actual violence. Then, an hour later when we were leaving, I had to call them again because the creep was sitting on the hood of my car with a bat. All because I wouldn't let him finish reading a magazine article(after closing) in a magazine he stated he wouldn't be buying. So I don't want to hear that BS about customers being right-when the store is closing get the hell out. Don't rush in at the last minute expecting to browse around. If its an emergency and you need the (whatever) right now 99% of the people in retail will help you. But if you're just browsing, or expecting to conduct a long, labor-intensive transaction-Tough Shit. Store's closed and might I suggest you plan your life a little better so it doesn't impact mine? I've got a family I'd like to go home and spend time with, you thoughtless jerk.

 

[SeerSGB]

I'm with the OP. 17 years of retail/fast food management and I have more horror stories than you can shake a stick at. Like the lady who threw the burrito at me because she said no onions and it had onions. The guy who pulled an Uzi on my graveyard cashier when he refused to give him free food. The lady who scrounged $17 dollars in change from her car in my drive through for an $18 order, then told me to take the difference out of a $20 bill. When I worked at Borders Books clearing the store was the worst part of the night. Not cleaning it-clearing it. I'd start making intercom announcements 1/2 hour before close, then every ten minutes and still people would ignore this and have to be asked to leave. Some of them were a lot of fun. There was the guy who got so angry I had to call the police for fear of actual violence. Then, an hour later when we were leaving, I had to call them again because the creep was sitting on the hood of my car with a bat. All because I wouldn't let him finish reading a magazine article(after closing) in a magazine he stated he wouldn't be buying. So I don't want to hear that BS about customers being right-when the store is closing get the hell out. Don't rush in at the last minute expecting to browse around. If its an emergency and you need the (whatever) right now 99% of the people in retail will help you. But if you're just browsing, or expecting to conduct a long, labor-intensive transaction-Tough Shit. Store's closed and might I suggest you plan your life a little better so it doesn't impact mine? I've got a family I'd like to go home and spend time with, you thoughtless jerk.

Whoo-hooo, gun story time

-- Bookstore, Christmas "last minute" sale; we had a bunch of action figures and books for various movies. We're packed, we're doing cash drops one after the other. The young man walks up and buy a bookmark, no biggie, I notice a .45 stuck in the waistband of his pants and his friend is looking around and watching the floor managers. They leave, but sit in the parking lot watching the store. I tell the manager that somethings up, call the cops to make a sweep, she doesn't-- says I'm too jumpy-- so I do it myself. They come through, and soon as the cruiser pulls into the lot the boys jump in their car and bolt. Jump ahead to a hour later, we're locking up and the cop comes in to talk to me, cause soon as the cruiser left the property they came back and robbed the IHOP up the strip from our store and beat the crap out of the night cashier.

-- Gun pulled on me cause the truckstop I worked for changed the free coffee policy. Another drive slung a bag of walnuts at my head cause the manager pointed at me and said "it was his idea"- it wasn't, I didn't even know it had changed-- none of the 1st shift cashiers did-- and I was still giving out coffee on the old policy and ended up after getting threatened with a gun and a bag of walnuts thrown at me, I got the reprimand.

-- Night shift, driver's lounge, football game is on. We had the channels on the bigscreen locked so that only ESPN, CNN, and one I figure were available. Driver buys a universal remote and changes the settings and takes the game off and puts it some TV show he liked. The only other driver tells the guy to change it back, the guy refuses. The other driver walks out to his truck, comes back in and like a minute later we hear the unmistakable sound of a gun's slide cocking. Me and the super run over there and find the other driver putting a pistol at the head of the guy that changed the channel. I go call the cops, the super keeps talking to him, finally the guy sits down, watches the game, and lays the pistol on the side table. Cops role up, he hands the pistol over, goes outside with them, they talk, he gets in the truck and leaves. Cop comes in and tells us they let him go so long as he didn't come back to our truckstop and he handed over the gun. The threatened driver wants to press charges, the cop tells him the best thing he can do it forget it happened and leave it be.

 

[Trekker4747]

-- Gun pulled on me cause the truckstop I worked for changed the free coffee policy. Another drive slung a bag of walnuts at my head cause the manager pointed at me and said "it was his idea"- it wasn't, I didn't even know it had changed-- none of the 1st shift cashiers did-- and I was still giving out coffee on the old policy and ended up after getting threatened with a gun and a bag of walnuts thrown at me, I got the reprimand.

It's always a bad day when you get beat in the head with another man's nuts.

 

[SeerSGB]

Anyone that works a deli/produce dept. knows this one: the last minute party tray. To many times than I care to count.

Last minute before the dept. closes someone calls up, wants a completely fresh cut tray for 50 for the next day. No problem, the graveyard shift can put it together, that's what they're for: filling party orders. It's a big job, more so if you have to pick produce and slice and decorate completely fresh. 30 minutes later, everything is packed up and cleared, one team is sanitizing, one is staging the food for the graveyard, and some poor sucker in the freezer doing inventory...someone banging on the door "I'm here to pick the tray I ordered...no, I called about 20 minutes ago, the man on the phone said it be ready in 30 minutes." Cue brief argument, customer leaves, 5 minutes later her comes the asshole 2nd shift front-end floor super who doesn't get that the customer was never told no such thing. That while we could do it it would be about 5 hours apiece of overtime for a 6 person crew, and-- oh yeah-- the can't get into the deli cooler for the deli meats the tray needs cause-- big surprise-- they went home a hour ago, and the graveyard super has the key to the fucking lock and she won't be punching in till 5AM.

Exit pissed off customer with $25 Kroger giftcard to keep her a loyal customer.

 

[Amaris]

^ Amen to both you and Trekker on deli and meat dept. I've worked both, and Trekker, I know how much of a PITA cleaning the meat grinder is. I empathize.

J.

 

[Trekker4747]

^ Amen to both you and Trekker on deli and meat dept. I've worked both, and Trekker, I know how much of a PITA cleaning the meat grinder is. I empathize.

J.

FWITW - I don't work in the deli. However, our department does have several pre-formed packaged hams (Farmland, Corn King, Hormel, etc.) that are under our watch and we're the ones who end having to slice them -deli won't do it because they're not theirs.

 

[SeerSGB]

^ Amen to both you and Trekker on deli and meat dept. I've worked both, and Trekker, I know how much of a PITA cleaning the meat grinder is. I empathize.

J.

Meat slicer = Devil.

I was working as early-morning prep-cook for a chain coffee/sandwich shop; in at 5am, home at 11am, cutting veg, meat, and precooking stuff for the lunch shift. One day someone thought it's be cut to come up from behind and spook me while I had my hands on the blade as I was putting the freshly sharpened and cleaned blade back in place. I jerked, my finger in between the blade and the output, took off the tip of one of my fingers. And the top it off, I get a write up for "unsanitary workplace behavior" cause I didn't clean the slicer before I went to the hospital, I left it for the other evening prep-cook to do; who promptly bitched to the shift super that she was having to clean up my mess

 

[Middle Earther]

I worked in a bookstore once and we sold greeting cards too. A very irate woman came in to return a box of Christmas cards. The box was opened and she had no receipt and was shocked when I said that if she didn't have a reciept, she needed to talk to the manager and I gave her the times the manager would be in. Why was she so irate? The words in the Christmas card were written in RED ink. (Such a surprising choice of colors at Christmas, I supposed)

She then says something like: "Well, I'm going to rip open boxes to see the ink color before I buy a new set." and begins to walk toward the cards.

I say, calmly, "If you vandalize store property, I will have to call the police."

She storms off, so offended and then shows up to complain to the manager in the next day or so about how "rude" I was.

The sense of entitlement that people feel is amazing to me. In light of that, I always try to sympathize with the worker behind the counter. I, too, had my share of people tapping at the window after hours. One sympathizes...

 

[trampledamage]

And the top it off, I get a write up for "unsanitary workplace behavior" cause I didn't clean the slicer before I went to the hospital, I left it for the other evening prep-cook to do; who promptly bitched to the shift super that she was having to clean up my mess

And that's a whole other thread's worth of venting - asshole co-workers!

 

[Trekker4747]

I was working as early-morning prep-cook for a chain coffee/sandwich shop; in at 5am, home at 11am, cutting veg, meat, and precooking stuff for the lunch shift. One day someone thought it's be cut to come up from behind and spook me while I had my hands on the blade as I was putting the freshly sharpened and cleaned blade back in place. I jerked, my finger in between the blade and the output, took off the tip of one of my fingers. And the top it off, I get a write up for "unsanitary workplace behavior" cause I didn't clean the slicer before I went to the hospital, I left it for the other evening prep-cook to do; who promptly bitched to the shift super that she was having to clean up my mess

You're fucking with me, right? You got written up for not cleaning equipment after cutting severly injured on it?

I was on the bone saw once cutting a T-Bone. Customer walked behind the counter, up to me, tapped me on the shoulder and DEMANDED to know why we didn't have [some item] on the shelf.

What. The. Fuck?!

But, hey, the customer is always right. I guess it is foolish of me to not expect to be startled by someone while I'm operating a fucking ban saw that can take my hand off!!!

 

[SeerSGB]

I worked in a bookstore once and we sold greeting cards too. A very irate woman came in to return a box of Christmas cards. The box was opened and she had no receipt and was shocked when I said that if she didn't have a reciept, she needed to talk to the manager and I gave her the times the manager would be in. Why was she so irate? The words in the Christmas card were written in RED ink. (Such a surprising choice of colors at Christmas, I supposed)

She then says something like: "Well, I'm going to rip open boxes to see the ink color before I buy a new set." and begins to walk toward the cards.

I say, calmly, "If you vandalize store property, I will have to call the police."

She storms off, so offended and then shows up to complain to the manager in the next day or so about how "rude" I was.

The sense of entitlement that people feel is amazing to me. In light of that, I always try to sympathize with the worker behind the counter. I, too, had my share of people tapping at the window after hours. One sympathizes...

Porn, plastic wrap porno, always got for a laugh at asshole. Nothing more embarrassing to a mother or Jr. when you catch Jr. pulling the wrapper off a Hustler and when mom goes to pay you throw a wrapper on the counter and tell her that you have her kid on cam ripping the wrapper off then walking into the men's room with a porn mag. Some would pay up, others would demand to see the tape; bonus points if the kid left the mag in the bathroom and it was "used" and mom gets to put it in her shopping bag and leave with it.

And I top Christmas card lady: Harry Potter is satan worship and witchcraft and pornography, and she [the customer] was going to sue the store for selling it to her 14 year old daughter. She actually tried, we got a called from her lawyer, but last I heard the company's legal dept. threatened to counter sue and her lawyer headed for the hills and she dropped the issue.

You're fucking with me, right? You got written up for not cleaning equipment after cutting severly injured on it?

Yeppers, got wrote up. I filed a complaint with corporate HR, but they said that the timing of the complaint by the other cook and the accident were "unclear" and that it was open to interpenetration as to which happened first.

 

[Mistral]

I'm with the OP. 17 years of retail/fast food management and I have more horror stories than you can shake a stick at. Like the lady who threw the burrito at me because she said no onions and it had onions. The guy who pulled an Uzi on my graveyard cashier when he refused to give him free food. The lady who scrounged $17 dollars in change from her car in my drive through for an $18 order, then told me to take the difference out of a $20 bill. When I worked at Borders Books clearing the store was the worst part of the night. Not cleaning it-clearing it. I'd start making intercom announcements 1/2 hour before close, then every ten minutes and still people would ignore this and have to be asked to leave. Some of them were a lot of fun. There was the guy who got so angry I had to call the police for fear of actual violence. Then, an hour later when we were leaving, I had to call them again because the creep was sitting on the hood of my car with a bat. All because I wouldn't let him finish reading a magazine article(after closing) in a magazine he stated he wouldn't be buying. So I don't want to hear that BS about customers being right-when the store is closing get the hell out. Don't rush in at the last minute expecting to browse around. If its an emergency and you need the (whatever) right now 99% of the people in retail will help you. But if you're just browsing, or expecting to conduct a long, labor-intensive transaction-Tough Shit. Store's closed and might I suggest you plan your life a little better so it doesn't impact mine? I've got a family I'd like to go home and spend time with, you thoughtless jerk.

Whoo-hooo, gun story time

-- Bookstore, Christmas "last minute" sale; we had a bunch of action figures and books for various movies. We're packed, we're doing cash drops one after the other. The young man walks up and buy a bookmark, no biggie, I notice a .45 stuck in the waistband of his pants and his friend is looking around and watching the floor managers. They leave, but sit in the parking lot watching the store. I tell the manager that somethings up, call the cops to make a sweep, she doesn't-- says I'm too jumpy-- so I do it myself. They come through, and soon as the cruiser pulls into the lot the boys jump in their car and bolt. Jump ahead to a hour later, we're locking up and the cop comes in to talk to me, cause soon as the cruiser left the property they came back and robbed the IHOP up the strip from our store and beat the crap out of the night cashier.

-- Gun pulled on me cause the truckstop I worked for changed the free coffee policy. Another drive slung a bag of walnuts at my head cause the manager pointed at me and said "it was his idea"- it wasn't, I didn't even know it had changed-- none of the 1st shift cashiers did-- and I was still giving out coffee on the old policy and ended up after getting threatened with a gun and a bag of walnuts thrown at me, I got the reprimand.

-- Night shift, driver's lounge, football game is on. We had the channels on the bigscreen locked so that only ESPN, CNN, and one I figure were available. Driver buys a universal remote and changes the settings and takes the game off and puts it some TV show he liked. The only other driver tells the guy to change it back, the guy refuses. The other driver walks out to his truck, comes back in and like a minute later we hear the unmistakable sound of a gun's slide cocking. Me and the super run over there and find the other driver putting a pistol at the head of the guy that changed the channel. I go call the cops, the super keeps talking to him, finally the guy sits down, watches the game, and lays the pistol on the side table. Cops role up, he hands the pistol over, goes outside with them, they talk, he gets in the truck and leaves. Cop comes in and tells us they let him go so long as he didn't come back to our truckstop and he handed over the gun. The threatened driver wants to press charges, the cop tells him the best thing he can do it forget it happened and leave it be.

Oh, I have more. The (?) best was the guy who had too much to drink and got depressed about his girlfriend leaving him-so he blew his brains out right by the menu board of my Taco Bell. Guess who got to go wash grey matter off the menu at 10:30 at night? District said we couldn't close down unless the cops ordered us to, so my guys were working the lobby for 2 hours after it was s'posed to be closed.

 

[SeerSGB]

Oh, I have more. The (?) best was the guy who had too much to drink and got depressed about his girlfriend leaving him-so he blew his brains out right by the menu board of my Taco Bell. Guess who got to go wash grey matter off the menu at 10:30 at night? District said we couldn't close down unless the cops ordered us to, so my guys were working the lobby for 2 hours after it was s'posed to be closed.

Ha, I knew there was something extra in the burito.


Theater: Summer, theater with bust AC unit, drunk girl and boy come into theater, The go see the remake of "Texas Chainsaw Massacre", they order a insane amount of diet cola, hot dogs, nachos, candy and extra butter popcorn and keep coming back for more, on top of it they're drinking beer in the theater. Predictable result: Girl runs out of the show 1/2 way through, she's puking, pissing and shitting herself, and leaving a trail to the ladies room. Where she precedes to puke, shit, and piss on everything but the toilet. End of the show, we go to clean up the theater and find a nightmare of the same about mid way down the rows of seats. Next day the boyfriend calls up and demands a free set of tickets cause they didn't get to see the whole movie the night before cause of bad food

 

[Trekker4747]

:considers telling the story of the old woman who dropped a loaf on the floor:


Trekker, not talking about bread.

 

[SeerSGB]

:considers telling the story of the old woman dropped a loaf on the floor:


Trekker, not talking about bread.

Only if I can tell the one about 30 something guy that was at a Yi-Gi-Oh (however it's spelled) tournament who dropped his piss bottle (because he didn't want to get up from the card table) on the floor.

 

[Trekker4747]

I tell this one often:

I'm standing there working along, minding my own business, occasionaily looking up to see if anyone needs help. Out of the corner of my vision I see a customer approaching the counter, I prepare to avert my gaze to them to great when the guy slams his hand down, hard, on the counter and yells out "I DEMAND A STEAK!"

I look at him, a beat, I smile and say, "Yes sir, what kind of steak can I get for you?"

Afterwards my co-worker comes up to me and chuckles and says, "Man, I could tell you wanted to say something there. Nice restraint."

The guy was a loud borish asshole throughout his time in the store, yelling, loud belching, etc. If I was management I would've kicked his ass out.

But, hey, the customer is always right! So it's OK for them to treat employees like a slave and places of business like their livingroom!

 

[SeerSGB]

The wanderers: The customers that walk into the office or the stock room cause they just know there's more back there and we're not putting in on the shelf cause it's on sale this week; as if 20 of whatever it is isn't enough for them. Yeah, there's no reason at all that things like a cardboard bailer is off limits to people who are authorized for using it, and sure opening up and sticking 1/2 your body inside can't possibly end badly. Nah, go ahead and lean down into the trash compactor, cause that's the place we keep the really good stuff.

 

[Mallory]

:considers telling the story of the old woman who dropped a loaf on the floor:


Trekker, not talking about bread.

I have one of those stories too. Except it was an old man at a checkout back in 1974.

 

[Trekker4747]

This woman was just walking along and -plop- -plop- -plop- like she was a horse.

But the guy who got clean the floor should be happy he has a job. The store could find anyone willing to clean up human shit in a grocery store aisle.

 

[RoJoHen]

Today we had to cut off a guy because he was too drunk to drink anymore. Then he started sneaking in his own rum and pouring it into a Coke. We kicked him out.

Then someone called on the phone and tried to order mixed drinks...TO GO! Not only is that retarded, it's completely illegal.

Oh, some customers are just dumb.