What are the most chivalrous deeds you've done so far?

[RJDiogenes]

While I've always believed in the equality of women, old-school Hippie that I am (actually, I expect the equality of women, which can be a bit troublesome in these days of political correctness), I usually do things like hold doors, offer to carry stuff, pay for meals and so on. But then, I generally help whoever needs help at any given time. I suppose the most chivalrous things I've done are: 1) Promoted the equality of women for the last 40+ years, 2) decried gender stereotypes for an equal span and 3) worked in Women's Health for 22 years.

 

[Gaith]

Whenever possible/reasonable, I hold doors, and let women board/exit buses/planes before me, even if their row is behind mine. And then sometimes guys will take this as a sign that I'm letting everyone pass, and then I get to pointedly cut in front of them when they try to follow suit, mentally cackling at their confusion and annoyance.

Now that I'm making a decent wage, I'll buy a lady drinks. I try to avoid dinner and other meals in the course of first dates, but if a meal happens, I'll be prepared to foot the bill, though I'll almost certainly agree to a proposal to go Dutch.

 

[Roshi]

Mercy fucks.

 

[Lonemagpie]

I won't hit women. Although I will defend myself if a woman was to attack me, just not in a man on man way (fists, etc). I don't think hitting women is fair because men are naturally stronger.

That doesn't really follow though, what if you got attacked by a woman that was clearly your physical better? What would your principles matter then?

Evade and escape.

It took my wife ages to get me to engage in sparring with her when paired up at the taekwondo club we both go to, and I've never got comfortable with it...

I always hold back when sparring with her or any of the other females there.

 

[iguana_tonante]

I won't hit women. Although I will defend myself if a woman was to attack me, just not in a man on man way (fists, etc). I don't think hitting women is fair because men are naturally stronger.

That's ridiculous. What does "fair" has to do with fighting? From an ethical point of view, I understand trying to restrain a weaker attacker instead of just harming them, but what does sex have to do with it? So Inga the valkyrie gets a free pass trying to rip your head off, but Dave the midget is fair game? That's silly. Also, if you are worried about silly things as "being fair", you aren't fighting. You are playing.

That doesn't really follow though, what if you got attacked by a woman that was clearly your physical better? What would your principles matter then?

Evade and escape.

It took my wife ages to get me to engage in sparring with her when paired up at the taekwondo club we both go to, and I've never got comfortable with it...

I always hold back when sparring with her or any of the other females there.

Well, that's the opposite of chivalrous, which is defined as "courtesy, respect and honourable conduct between opponents". There is nothing honourable or respectful in performing below your ability in any competition. Not just that, you are wasting their time: how can they train properly if their opponent is slacking?

I understand this is something you might not be comfortable with, but as a practitioner of martial arts, this attitude annoys me.

 

[Flying Spaghetti Monster]

Does carrying a woman count, either because she hurt herself, or does it only count just to show that she doesn't have to worry - the romantic carrying?

 

[Maestro]

My sister-in-law is smart, capable, and able-to-be independent woman. Except, she married a mysoginist and allowed herself to become the ultimate Suzy-Homemaker.

We were visiting this weekend. Yesterday morning, her husband was gone to work, my wife wasn't yet up, and I was sitting in the living room playing with one of my nieces. My SIL asks if she can go and take a shower (as if I'd mind watching my nieces and my daughter -- my nephew was still asleep).

She tried to take the baby monitor with her so she could cut the shower short if the little fella woke up. I refused to allow it; I kept the monitor. Not surprisingly, not long after my SIL started her shower, my four-month-old nephew woke.

By the time my SIL came back downstairs from her shower, I'd changed and dressed my nephew, ordered my daughter and nieces to get dressed, loaded her dishwasher, and made a fresh pot of coffee.

The ONLY thing I was technically obligated to do was to parent my daughter. Instead, the whole gang was ready to go.

 

[sidious618]

Mercy fucks.

You, sir, are a gentleman and a scholar. There is no more chivalrious an act than that.

 

[ares93]

A lot of things i read here should come naturally to people. I wouldnt call it chivalrous, just common sense.

 

[Paulcpick]

Back a few years ago before descretion being the better part of valor was beat into me, me and my father were throwing a party at which a young woman whom I was extremely taken with showed up to, and one of the less upstanding people there took it upon himself to steal her(her mothers) car. Well, me at the time being full of testosterone decided to go to this young mans house with the biggest gun my Dad owned and take it back....

Long story short, she got her car back, and no one got hurt. Looking back, that was an incredibly dumb thing to do..... Boy I miss being a rash, headstrong teenager...
I don't know if that's truly chivalrous, but at the time it seemed like it was....
Lotta good it did me, she's married to someone else, and Im posting on the Trekbbs at 1 am in the morning

 

[Gaith]

^

Whenever possible/reasonable, I hold doors, and let women board/exit buses/planes before me, even if their row is behind mine.

Oh, and elevators, too: dames enter and leave first. A coworker of mine commented approvingly a few weeks ago on my chivalrous waiting for her and another woman to exit the lift at their leisure. Pride!

 

[Paulcpick]

Yea, that story gets that reaction alot, but such was life being a teen in Deep East Texas. Especially the fast living life my Dad and I lived back then.... It was sure fun, and I wouldn't trade those days for all the gold in Ft Knox, but even all the gold in ft Knox wouldn't be enough for me to actually want to back and do it again.

 

[Lonemagpie]

Well, that's the opposite of chivalrous, which is defined as "courtesy, respect and honourable conduct between opponents". There is nothing honourable or respectful in performing below your ability in any competition. Not just that, you are wasting their time: how can they train properly if their opponent is slacking?

I understand this is something you might not be comfortable with, but as a practitioner of martial arts, this attitude annoys me.

I'm aware of the dichotomy, and struggle against it - it's the way I was brought up, I suppose, and I'm describing it to show an example of how ingrained the "you don't hit girls" sort of upbringing can be, for the posts I was specifically responding to.

(and on those occasions where I've been able to or goaded into actually going full-on against a female, I'm always forced to break off at odd moments to apologize...)

It's the sort of thing that makes us people complex.

 

[Jono]

I changed a flat tire for a couple, the wife didn't know how to and the husband was in a wheelchair.

I didn't sleep with one of my best-friend's ex-girlfriends when she was drunk, put her tongue down my throat and tried to get into my pants.

 

[Kirby]

During summer break in college either 1987 or 88, I was hanging out with a friend of mine from High School. She came over to my house (actually my parents house where I was staying for the summer) and we had a few beers, and she ended up getting really drunk.
I didn't take advantage of her, and I didn't want her to drive drunk, so I drove her to her parent's house in her car, and then I walked home. It was about 5 miles, in the middle of the night, and mostly along big, open fields which may or may not have had coyotes in them.
We never talked about it, and I'm sure she just assumed that she drove home that night.

 

[Snaploud]

A friend of mine had a break-down. She was living in an abusive home, and she was experiencing severe OCD, anxiety and panic disorder, and other psychiatric issues at the same time. I had her move in with me (despite the risks from that paranoid psychotic of a father), worked to get her credit sorted out (as the father had about 20 cards in her name), and helped her gradually get better over the course of a few years (getting her the right treatment and helping her get back into the workforce).

 

[Kestra]

So chivalrous means doing nice things for girls?

 

[Mr Silver]

So chivalrous means doing nice things for girls?

Not originally, but it's pretty much become synonymous with doing things for girls. Its a term from the middle ages used to describe service to others.

 

[Maestro]

It seems to have become so.

 

[Gaith]

^ Specifically, doing nice things for girls because they're girls, and which you probably wouldn't do for a dude, yes.

A friend of mine had a break-down. She was living in an abusive home, and she was experiencing severe OCD, anxiety and panic disorder, and other psychiatric issues at the same time. I had her move in with me (despite the risks from that paranoid psychotic of a father), worked to get her credit sorted out (as the father had about 20 cards in her name), and helped her gradually get better over the course of a few years (getting her the right treatment and helping her get back into the workforce).

Wow, damn. I surrender.