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Using English on TBBS

You don't call an adult by their given name until they give you permission. Until such time as President Obama says, "you may call me Barry", you call him Mr Obama/ President Obama. Just as you call me Mrs/ Ms W... until I tell you that you may call me by my first name.

Actually, here in Canada, I'm finding that people are ignoring that rule with increasing frequency.

It pisses me off. Call me Mr. Cold-and-Distant, but I find it very presumptuous, and overly familiar.

And I'm really not all that cold and distant. I freely give people permission to address me by my first name--unless they're one of my students. But the permission should be mine to give or withhold.
 
I feel old before my time. I'm a student at university and I find it odd when lecturers or administrators email me addressing me with my forename and then sign off with theirs.
 
I hate being called "Ma'am". If "you" is insufficient for your needs, address me as "Ms W....." or "Mrs...... "if you want formality, and bypass the pronouns completely.
I hate being called "ma'am" too. :p

Unless someone knows you well enough to know you're married, it would be dire manners to call you Mrs., though.
I think the wedding ring I've been wearing for more than half my life might be a bit of a "give-away" :lol:. It's more common to use Ms here anyway (much to MIL's annoyance:guffaw:) - I've used Ms since I was 18.
I prefer Ms., yeah. Differentiation between married and unmarried women but not the converse strikes me as a bit sexist.

Although, I don't know if people check wedding rings unless they're--well, you know.
 
My "problem" with "you" is not polite form/intimate form. It's the lack of plural. Sometimes it makes communication really unclear. "Y'all" doesn't solve the problem, because not everyone knows it (certainly, not majority of people where I live, in spite of English being one of official languages and many people knowing and using it).
 
"Y'all" doesn't solve the problem, because not everyone knows it
:lol: here, that contruct is an invitation to have the mickey taken out of you. I have no issue with "you" singular and "you" plural. That is how I learned English. However the number of people who say "youse" - arghh!!!
 
I can't stand "y'all." I hear Deliverance banjos whenever someone says it. I grew up with "you guys." *cue Electric Company intro*
 
but still...I could not drop the formal thing, unless the other wishes me to do so and offers to me to be informal with him or her. And even than I´d find it hard to do and would need some time to be able to feel comfortable with it.
I agree with you. I prefer not to drop the formality sometimes. On the opposite, I feel forced informality to be bothersome, rude, and condescending. There is nothing more irritating than someone who just met and who tries to behave like your best friend. Keep your distance, man. I don't know you.

Personally, I'm fine with formal, I'm fine with informal. It's the transition that's awkward. I don't know when I'm supposed to switch.

I remember I was watching some Italian movie and there was a minor little "romantic comedy" moment when the man says "come si chiama" (either what's your name or what's his name) asking about a third person, but she introduces herself. Following the movie, they started using informal after they slept together. I'm sure there's some middle ground between meeting for the first time and having sex, but I don't know where it is.
 
The interesting thing was just having "you" originated as an effort to refer to everyone formally. Now, it almost seems rude to use "you" and there's certainly some desire to create a new you plural, indicating that people have forgotten this origin.
Over my dead body. There's no reason to have a formal system of address. It's a horrible thing.
“Horrible”? What are you, a Commie or something? :p

Seriously, there’s nothing wrong with a language having familiar and polite forms of address. Using the formal pronoun keeps a respectful distance between people. In most Spanish-speaking countries, it’s considered extremely bad form, verging on insult, to address a stranger with the familiar “” rather than the formal “usted.” I believe they have an expression that translates as, “Since when are we tu-ing each other?”

. . . One odd cultural behavior I have noticed in Texas is how women are addressed in the workplace. It seems common for people to refer to female co-workers as "Miss Jennifer" or "Ms. Susan". . .
That’s also common in the Deep South — remember “Miss Scarlett”? Interestingly, Southerners were using “Miz” long before Gloria Steinem was born! (Of course, that was just a dialect pronunciation of “Miss.”)

I look forward to you addressing the US President as "Barry" on your first meeting. . .
You don't call an adult by their given name until they give you permission. Until such time as President Obama says, "you may call me Barry", you call him Mr Obama/ President Obama. Just as you call me Mrs/ Ms W... until I tell you that you may call me by my first name.
It’s customary and correct to address the POTUS as either “Mr. President” or “Sir.” “Sir” will do if you’re on active duty in the military, since he’s your Commander-in-Chief.

I grew up with "dudes." "Y'all" does sound so southern and redneck-ish.
Southern, yes. Redneck-ish? That’s simply stereotyping. Millions of educated professionals in the South use “you all” and “y’all.”

Sometimes I feel that saying "dudes" ages me. Is this correct?
Originally, “dude” meant a fancy dresser, or it was a term used by Western rural folks for an Eastern city slicker. (Remember “dude ranches”?)

The use of “dude” as a general slang word for “man” or “boy” started with surfing culture in the 1960s and spread into the mainstream in the late ’70s and ’80s. By me, that’s recent.

ADDENDUM: It just dawned on me that nowadays, “dude ranch” could have a completely different meaning! :lol:
 
It’s customary and correct to address the POTUS as either “Mr. President” or “Sir.” “Sir” will do if you’re on active duty in the military, since he’s your Commander-in-Chief.
Not my Head of govt, Head of State or CIC.
Our head of Govt is the Prime Minister. They get either Prime Minister, or PM Surname or even PM given name surname, generally not Mr/Ms Prime Minister - unless the interviewer is trying to make a particular point. The Governor General is referred to as GG Surname and called Governor General then whatever other title - eg Admiral if they were previously an Admiral, or with our State Governor, Dr .....

On the other hand our Head of State is HRH...or Her Majesty
 
I grew up with "dudes." "Y'all" does sound so southern and redneck-ish.
Southern, yes. Redneck-ish? That’s simply stereotyping. Millions of educated professionals in the South use “you all” and “y’all.”

I agree...that's pretty bad to stereotype all Southerners. As to why I think educated Southerners still do it--that is the least cumbersome construction in the English language to convey a concept that is absolutely elementary in most other world languages.
 
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