I am warming to jjtrek in theory the more I read of it here. Stylistically, it is not my thing, but whatever.
So though I am trying to be more appreciative, it is hard to argue with the assesment of nuKirk as an a**hole. Yes, there might be reasons. And he is better in JJ2. I hope he is fully formed by 3. A sign of the times, our less mythological, more materialist, scientific approach to everything, we (many of us anyway) prefer the cause and effect: WHY is our hero - sorry, protagonist - the way he is?
Compare the Gene Wilder Wonka to Depp Wonka. Wilder Wonka is what he is, fully formed chaotic good. Depp Wonka has to give us backstory with horrific headgear, bondage really, all from guess what? . . . a broken relationship with the father. Freud wins.
Note Charlie has no father, has a bedridden Grandpa Joe in place of Pike, but is neither cocky nor a**hole.
Also, though I am biased toward TOS, I just don't see oldKirk as cocky. He questions himself throughout the series and the films. From the start he seems likeable though firm (that's what she said?). The paragon of the father, always concerned about his love, the ship (a vessel, container, mother-figure) and his children, the crew. Let's throw Jung some love here too.
Be well!