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TOS Caption Contest #69 - Christmas Cheer

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Scotty: "What the? This bloody thing says I've gained ten pounds in the last week. Ah, what the hell does this piece of garbage know, anyway?"
 
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I might not be a Vulcan, Spock, but this ol' Georgia boy don't
need pointy ears to tell that ain't a proper dropped-D tuning.
 
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Scotty: "Well, that explains that. This Fung Shui detector says all our chi is draining into the starboard baffle."
 
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"Almost... almost. There. Now the Christmas lights will turn on and off to the song Take me home again Kathleen. That'll show those Klingon bastards."
 
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McCoy: "Spock! You've been sitting here all day playing that damn lute while you've let the Christmas turkey over there sit at room temperature? Are you trying to kill us?"
 
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Everybody loved Spock.

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James Doohan hadn't decided what he'd use the prop for this week.
 
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Och, lift ma sporran and call me Angus -- the remote for the 37.1 Surround
did'na have this many features! I'll need ta have thirty minutes!
 
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Spock: It would be of great help to me.

McCoy: Dammit Spock I'm a Doctor not a back up singer.
 
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Scotty: "Every night it's the same thing. I'm just about to drop off when some idiot bumps the ship and sets the alarm off!"

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Scotty: "'Borgus frat, Borgus frat', what the hell does it mean? Ach, it's not in here. Ah well, as long as no one else knows, it can mean anything I want it to."
 
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Uhura: "You kept me up all night Spock!"
Kirk: "Way to go stud!"
Uhura: "He wouldn't stop plucking."
McCoy: "Spock! You hound!"
Uhura: "Duelling banjos, but with Scotty on bagpipes!"

...

...

...

Kirk: "Naah, even I can't get any innuendo out of that."
 
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McCoy: "I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell."

Spock: "Doctor, having is not so pleasing a thing as wanting."
 
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Spock: Bilbo... Bilbo Baggins...
McCoy: Enough already, Spock, next thing you know Jim will want to do his rendition of "Mr. Tambourine Man."

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Scotty: The haggis is in the fire now.(beat) According to this, I should set the oven at 350 degrees. Then I poke it with this thing to make sure it's at the right temperature. Ack, this looked easier when Rachel Ray did it on 30 minute meals.
 
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