TOS Caption Contest #187: Fine Living

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "I'm begging you, do something about those man boobs."

Scotty: "But suh, I canna change the laws of physiques!"

 

[jep]

Kirk: "Ah, me so horny, ah, me so horny, ah, me so horny, me love you long time."

Scotty: "I'll bet you sing that to all the lads."




.

 

[LeadHead]

Superintendent Chalmers and Principal Skinner in Space...

Kirk: So Scotty, I guess we're starting a baseball team. So lets go through the lineup, Who's on First.

Scotty: Yes, not the question, but a Baseball Player with the unlikely name of 'Who.'

Kirk: SCOTTY!

 

[Isis]

In next week's episode of Star Trek, the crew of the Enterprise asks to be reassigned when a mysterious force takes over Scotty's body and starts running the ship. Mr. Spock discovers the true gravity of the situation when he discerns the force's real identity, the Jefferson's maid, Florence.

Featuring a guest voiceover by Marla Gibbs.

 

[ItsGreen]

I'm out there Captain and I'm loving every minute of it!

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

I'm out there Captain and I'm loving every minute of it!

Sulu: "Oh m... y'know... I have some standards."

 

[Isis]

Spock: "Once you go Vulcan, you won't ever be sulkin'."

 

[Isis]

Scotty (to himself): "Damn Target store. I walk all the way up to Ladies' Lingerie, and there's already a line."

 

[Isis]

Scotty: "OK, bonnie lads, relax, it's just me. And I see ye dinna forget the whips. I have the handcuffs, so we're all good to go."

Sulu: "Oh my."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Spock: Pardon me. Space burrito gives me gas like a mo'fo.

 

[jep]

Mirror Spock (with OS backing vocals by Kirk and Scotty):

Whenever life get you down
Keeps you wearing a frown
And the gravy train has left you behind
And when your all out of hope
Down at the end of your rope
And nobody's there to throw you a line

If you ever get so low
That you don't know which way to go
Come on and take a walk in my shoes
Never worry 'bout a thing
Got the world on a string
Cause I've got the cure for all of my blues (all of his blues)

I take a look at my bifurcated penis
And my troubles start a-meltin' away (ba-doom bop bop)
I take a look at my bifurcated penis
And the happy times are comin' to stay (be-doo)

I got a sing and I dance
When I glance in my pants
And a-feelin's like a sun shiny day
I take a look at my bifurcated Pe-e-enis
And a-everything is goin' my way (ba-doom bop bop)





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