TOS Caption Contest #150: Cutbacks Are A Bitch

[Shatmandu]

Hiya, folks.

First, I forgot to give The Badger a win last week for his photoshop putting ancient Kirk on a toilet. That kind of joke is my lifeblood, as you know, and I dropped the saggy, graying ball. I apologize to The Badger, and will add his win to this week's totals.

And we had another good week. Lets get right to the best, including one person getting their THIRD win in a row and two winners of the Double-Stuffed Win Award, brought to you by Spock's Penis:

Formation crop dusting.

Hijinks on the night watch...
Kevin Riley (OS): "Great one, Hansen! Perfect Kirk impression!" *sees turbo lift doors opening behind Hansen* "Now do Spock!"

[Woman in background babbling about cute shoes and a dress she saw earlier in the day, the skanky girl from work, and how he doesn't take the garbage out.]

Kirk, under breath: God I wish I had a phaser.

Nimoy and Shatner: "Sock it to us."
NBC Exec: "Okay, you're canceled."

Very good stuff. Thanks to the big winners and thanks to everyone who entered.

Starting this week, I'm going to cut back to two regular caps. We've been doing this a long time, and it's getting to be pretty slim pickings as far as unused, interesting shots goes.

Until TrekCore gets done screencapping the HD Season 2 BlueRays, that is. That'll open things up.

I'll still include a third odd one, like Kirk busting his ass or the black-and-white promo shot from last week. Those are always fun.

Anyway, this week's bits are:

And the difficult wild-card is:

Joe, oddly-angled

TOS Caption Contest Pantheon of Winners

26138 (2x)
A beaker full of death (4x)
Adam Ihle (4x)
AlphaTrionTJW
Alrik (2x)
Alyssa (3x)
ancient
Atavachron (2x)
Bad Atom (2x)
Battrekker
brian
Cakes488
CaptainJon
captain crow (6x) ***DOUBLE WIN***
Captain Kate (2x)
Classic Fan
commodore64
cooleddie74 (23x)
cultcross
Cuhl
DeafPoet
Defcon (2x)
Deranged Nastat
Diesel Micky Dolenz (12x)
Dohlman
DrBob (14x)
DS9Sega (7x)
EliyahuQeoni (3x)
EnsignHarper (2X)
FishDS9
galleywest (4x)
Gary7 (2x)
Gertch (26x)
goldbug (3x)
Guartho
Haggis and Tatties
Hambone (3x)
highlander (12x)
Isis (2X)
Jackson_Roykirk
J. Allen (2x)
jayrath
Jeri
Johnnyracefan (2x)
John_Picard (4x)
Jonas Grumby (3x) ***THIRD IN A ROW! HOLY CRAP!!!***
jptrekker (4x)
Kahloke
Kegek (2x)
Kirby (2x)
KJM
Mallory (4x)
MGagen
middyseafort (10x)
Milo Bloom
Mistral (2x)
Mojochi
M'Sharak (14x)
NCC-1701 (7x)
Nebusj
Nerys Myk (39x)
Noname Given (2x)
NTRPRZ
Outpost4 (16x)
Quo Vadimus
Rat Boy (47!x) ***Double Winner!***
Redfern (2x)
SciFi75 (5x)
scottydog (26x)
Sector 7
seigezunt (2x)
Shatmandu (25x)
Shaw (4x)
shivkala
Sir Rhosis (2x)
S'Kai
Sovay
SRFX
ssosmcin
Super Grover
Tallis Rhul
Tan Ru (2x)
T'Bonz (8x)
T'Girl (2x)
terranova
Tharpdevenport (3x)
the 4th hanson bro (4x)
TheGallifreyanSith
The Badger (4x) ***BELATED BIG WINNER!***
The Castellan
The Cutest of Borg (2x)
The Laughing Vulcan (21x)
The Old Mixer
The Squire of Gothos (11x)
The Tone (2x)
TigerOfDarkness (2x)
Tim M (3x)
Toban Kal
Tribble (6x)
Triskelion (28x) ***BIG WINNER***
Tristan
Turbo (2x)
UssGlenn (2x)
vassa
Ward Fowler (4x)
Woulfe (4x)
Yeoman Randi (2x)
Zachery Smith

 

[Shatmandu]

Shatner: "Look, if you want the last danish, just friggin' say so, Doohan ..."

Spock: "How long until someone photoshops an erection in my pants?"
McCoy: "What's smaller than a nanosecond?"

Ear infections and forced perspectives don't mix.

 

[Mysterion]

Spock: Yes, Doctor, that IS a roll of quarters in my pocket. Why do you ask?

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Kirk: Helen, not so rough next time.

Spock: Doctor, I would like to experience this "finishing job" that you are famous for.
McCoy: It'll cost extra.

Scotty: Ack! Meh bairns we're much better when they were made out of brewery vats!

 

[Nerys Myk]

DOOHAN: You're on the wrong set!!

 

[Rat Boy]

Kirk: "Trust me, I don't get beat up often."

Cupcake (off screen): "*cough*bullshit*cough*"

Spock: "Really?"

McCoy: "Yep, on both of them. Told you to wear a condom."

Scotty: "Dinnae tell you that Uhura canna drive stick?"

 

[Nerys Myk]

MCCOY: You'll recover, but keep away from Beat Poetry readings in the future.

 

[GhostFaceSaint]

Despite his best efforts Kirk still couldn't get his shirt off!

Crewman A: "What the hell is Scotty doing?"
Crewman B: "I think he 'had a wee nip' of his special antimatter formula."
Crewman C: "Antimatter formula?"
Crewman B: "Yeah I think he's been secretly distilling using the warp drive as a still."
Crewman A: "Bastard, you think he would offer to let us have 'a wee nip' too!

 

[Gil T.Azell]

Shatner: [Thinking] this blood looks so fake.

Scotty: "Aye, This is how I had her tied up"

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: I'll take another Whopper and more napkins.

 

[Triskelion]

Rand, that's the last time I make the safeword "corbomite".

Spock: It's an illuuuuuuusion!
McCoy: Give it up. We all saw where the bird went.

Talent night was cancelled after Scott's third drunken modern dance interpretation of a warp core breach.

 

[Jonas Grumby]

*picture begins to waver and fade as a voice breaks through...*

Voice (OS): "George! George Takei! Wake up! You're dreaming again!"

 

[T'Girl]

Scotty: "I am so kicking Kirk's ass!"

 

[Captain Crow]

Thanks for the bifurcated win Shatmandu.

Spock: Go ahead and touch them Doctor. You know you want to.

It was at that very moment Scotty forgot the safety word.

"Tupperware"

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Kirk: "Moths man, moths you wouldn't believe!"

McCoy: "Very funny Spock, so you have enough physiological control to make the medscan go 'Bow chika wow wow', now get off the bed, I have sick people to treat."

Scott: "Ach no, the warp drive beastie is tryin' to escape!"

Nimoy: "Well, Shatner's always losing his shirt, so I thought I'd give it a shot."
Kelley: "You might want to show a little more skin though."

 

[S'kai]

Shatner: [Thinking] this blood looks so fake.

Director: Calm down, Bill. People are gonna see this once, on a 13 inch screen, most of them don't even have color. Who the hell is ever gonna notice?

 

[Captain Crow]

Kirk: "Mental note: Never try to motorboat a six foot tall lesbian amazon with big knockers."

No one was impressed with Scotty's interpretive dance of how the matter and antimatter combined to make the warpdrive work.

Spock: Are you finished yet Doctor? I should have been to my mummenschanz rehersal five minute ago.

 

[scottydog]

Kirk: "All right already, I'll never again go down on you during your period."

Scotty: "Captain, I canna hang on without all me fingers!"

McCoy: "Going to a funeral?"

Spock: "Negative."

McCoy: "Becoming Goth?"

Spock: "Negative."

McCoy: "What then?"

Spock: "Love Men in Black and I'm getting Jiggy With It."

 

[The Badger]

Gosh, I didn't expect a belated win. I was being flippant in my last post. But I'll say no more, in case you take the win away!

Scotty: Well, ah've cleared everyone out'a enginerin', an' manacled mysel' to the wall, just like tha' anonymous note asked. Now ah just have ta wait for....

Sound Effects: (Door wooosh)

Sulu: (OS) Well HELLOOOOOO!!!!!

Scotty: Aye, an if ya didnae see that coming, you're on the wrong Trek forum...

 

[Tribble]

Tribble: Imageshack, fix your servers so that I can upload a photoshop, or else I will send blood-thirsty Kirk over, and that won't be a pretty sight.