Kirk: "For a man receiving a blow job, you look remarkably perplexed."
Spock: "Curious, why is Sulu wearing an afro wig?"
Kirk: "Uhura couldn't make it, Sulu here volunteered."
Kirk: "Cheer up Spock, the first night at camp is hard on everyone."
Spock: "I miss Winky..."
Kirk: "Winky is...?"
Spock: "My stuffed toy sehlat. I left him on the ship."
Kirk: "We can have Scotty beam him down."
Spock: "Father used to read War and Peace to me..."
Kirk: "Don't push your luck, Spock."
Spock: "... and Mother used to dress like a Risian dominatrix whore and breast feed me..."
...
...
...
Kirk: "I'll be in my bunk if you need me."
bathump
bathump
bathump
bathump
bathump
Spock: "What is that noise?"
Kirk: "Werner may have been stupid, but the Commandant wasn't. Caught McCoy trying to blackmail him for his camera. Two weeks in the cooler."
Spock: "and Werner?"
Kirk: "Turns out he wasn't kidding."
Together: "zzzzt, the Russian Front."