TOS Caption Contest #129 - Time

[cooleddie74]

KIRK:"Spock, GET OUT OF HIS COFFEE!!!"

McCOY:"Well, that does it, Jim...

I can never drink decaf again."

 

[cooleddie74]

SCRATCHY-SOUNDING SCHOOL SEX-FILM NARRATOR:"Being sexually intimate is a big responsibility.


It entails a transference of not only intimacy...but trust...and exposing one's self to both the possibility of disappointment...and the chances of contracting a sexually-transmitted disease.

Let's watch how these young, single Starfleet officers handle the responsibilities of sex and relationships in this...the modern world.

Mr. Leslie is a go-getter and a high achiever..."

 

[Shatmandu]

McCoy: "Now see what you've done?"

McCoy: "'Action figure' my ass, it's a doll. Pansy. And no, you can't have it back."

Leslie: "Welp, the constant gas tells me it's time to go take a shit. <tips fake hat> Au revoir, ladies."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Kirk: I'd like my Mego Spock figure with Kung-Fu grip back now, Bones.
McCoy: ...I'm gonna play with this in my bunk.

 

[Gertch]

Kirk: "Transporter room, when the Med Tech re-materialized with my polyp he did so in the Doctor's coffee."
Scotty: "Aye. Maybe he wont be stopping me from doing my jumping jacks next physical."

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Spock: Be very, very quite, crewman. There is a giant Eugenics clone of myself running around and we are engaged in a game of tag.

Crewman: A giant WHAT?!

Giant Spock: Gotcha! Tag, you are it.

 

[Outpost4]

Kirk, singing:

All around the mulberry bush,
The monkey chased the weasel.
The monkey stopped to pull up his sock,
Pop! Goes the Spock-o.

 

[Amaris]

Leslie: "Welp, the constant gas tells me it's time to go take a shit. <tips fake hat> Au revoir, ladies."

Oh my god. I can't stop laughing at this.


J.

 

[Outpost4]

Kirk: I liked the old food dispensers better.

 

[Shatmandu]

Snap, Crackle, and Spock.

Kirk: "I want them off the ship."

 

[Civil Shadow]

The mirror universe as depicted in Season 3.

 

[Gary7]

I had no idea there was a Star Trek episode called "The Gulliver Syndrome".

 

[Gertch]

"Easy Bones. They could have been Smurfs."

 

[Outpost4]

In the 23rd century, action figures are ACTION figures.

 

[John Picard]

McCoy: "Dammit, Jim. The little bastards are everywhere and they steal everything!"

Kirk: "Yes, but not to worry. It's only three days to Starbase 3, and the maintenance crew there will fumigate the entire ship."

 

[Civil Shadow]

I had no idea there was a Star Trek episode called "The Gulliver Syndrome".

Nah, because it's a mirrored image, yeah? And Season 3 was the cheapest oh soddit here's another 'chop:

Wasn't just Tribbles they saved from extinction. Wasn't just Tribbles that pissed off Klingons, either.

 

[Gertch]

Kirk: "I found three of these guys in my underwear today... you should try it."

 

[Rat Boy]

McCoy: "This retirement home food sucks."

Kirk: "Did I ever tell you about the time I was in the academy? I was seeing this hot Orion gal and one day she took me back to her dorm, but then Uhura showed up and I had to hide under the bed. Then she starts taking off her clothes..."

McCoy: "Not this damn story again."

 

[highlander]

Spock warned everyone that if he heard track K-13 one more time he was going to "fuck some shit up". Crewman Saggybottom was undaunted.

 

[highlander]

Old Bones: "Hey Jimmy do you know what 90 year old snatch tastes like?"
Old Jim: "No..What does it taste like?"
Old Bones: "Depends!!!"