TOS Caption Contest #122 - Into the Arena

[Rat Boy]

Al Gorn, the pizza delivery lizard: "Traffic on the 405 was a BITCH!"

 

[cooleddie74]

GORN: "Can you ssssssssign my dagger?

The hatchlingssssssss back on the Homeworld would love it-t-t-t-t!!"

KIRK:"So?

None of you guys have ever given a Dirty Sanchez before?

Not ONE of you?

Amateurs."

 

[Shatmandu]

Al Gorn: "The manager sssaid I couldn't acccept checksss from you any longer, INVADER."

Al Gorn: "Because sssticking my penissss up through a hole in the pizza would be againssst company policcccy, INVADER."

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "The dick-in-the-popcorn thing really worked."
McCoy, nudging Spock: "What did T'Pring think of the movie, otherwise?"

Al Gorn, racist pizza delivery man: "Oh, yeah. We're busier than a set of jumper cables at a Mexican wedding."

 

[cooleddie74]

"So...you guys as hungry as I am?

Whaddya want? It's my treat this time..."

KIRK:"NO...I..I don't have a tip!!!!

ARRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHH!!!!!!"

 

[cooleddie74]

"I'm not supposed to be THIS red a shirt, dammit!!!!"

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: Don't answer the door. If it takes longer than 30 minutes its free.

AL GORN: Who's late now, bitch?!

 

[Shatmandu]

Al Gorn: "I'm not a big fan of pineapple on pizza, INVADER. You should try one topped with sssmall, sssoft-boned rodentssss."

Al Gorn: "I don't usssually asssk, but could I ussse your bathroom?"

 

[Nerys Myk]

AL GORN: Look I'm on a tight schedule, do you know which house belongs to Bill S. Preston, Esq or not?

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK:"The Crazy Bread's in your tunic?

Never mind, then."

 

[Shatmandu]

Metron: "With your meager tip to the Gorn delivery man, even though he forgave when you said you couldn't find your coupon, you demonstrated the unadvanced trait of cheap-assedness. Therefore, you and your ship will be destroyed. The poor guy has thirty hatchlings at home."

<a harp tones, Kirk disappears, silent credits roll over black background>

 

[cooleddie74]

METRON:"You didn't ask for anchovies?

Funny. The dispatcher said you did."

 

[Shatmandu]

Kirk: "Sulu? Yeah, I know a guy named Sulu. Why?"

Al Gorn: "Last time I delivered to an Enterprise crewmember, it was a black lady who sang me a song and then blew me."
Kirk: "Well, I could sing you a song ..."

Al Gorn: "Look, I don't care. You're the one who ordered chicken wings from a pizza place last time. Fuck you, if they tasted like shit."

Al Gorn: "I alssso sssell a little weed on the sssside, if you're interesssted."

 

[scottydog]

Gorn: "Figures you'd want a sausage pizza."

 

[Hambone]

GORN: "Pizza delivery for...'I.C. Wiener?' Ah, crud."

KIRK: "No, wait, that's my real name!"

 

[cooleddie74]

SANDY DUNCAN

The Next Degradation

GORN:"You ssssssseeen Sssssandy Duncan around here, Human?

Sssssshe ordered one with everything..."

 

[cooleddie74]

Now THAT'S a spicy Domino's Pizza.(TM)

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: I want to talk to your supervisor!

KIRK: You're the supervisor?

SANDY: Hurry up, my mom's gonna be here in 10 minutes. I got cheer practice.

 

[cooleddie74]

KIRK:"What? No breadsticks and dipping sauce?

Asshole.""

"Are you a Morlock? You have the wide hips and ferral face of a Morlock."

 

[Spock-2012]

Kirk: You know, you should wear a longer...skirt? *shudder*

Sulu: Where to now, Captain?
Kirk: Second star to the right, and straight on till morning.

The redshirt positively glowed when the beautiful alien lady kissed him.