TOS Caption Contest #111 - Fighting Back

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Tonia Barrows: My God. I haven't been fucked like that since grade school.
McCoy: And now you know why they call me "Bones."

Kirk: I. Will. Not. Submit. To. My. Prostate exam!

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK:I didn't tell you before because I wasn't sure whether it was real or not. But I am sure now. It is real. There's a man out there. Or a ... a gremlin, or... whatever . If I described him to you, you'd really think I was gone

 

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Redshirt 1: "Hurry up, we've got to get this sexdoll to Sulu's quarters before the Captain sees it."
Redshirt 2: "Why'd it have to weigh so damn much?"
Redshirt 1: "It's supposed to be lifelike."
Redshirt 2: "Oh"

 

[Outpost4]

Kirk: But...I...don't...like...blue...food...cubes!

 

[Triskelion]

We played a little game of Kirk and the Gorn Lizard!

There's no such thing as "air cymbals", Captain!

 

[Outpost4]

McCoy: Don't worry, little missy, he won't ever harm anybody again.

 

[John Picard]

Kirk: I. Will. Not. Submit. To. My. Prostate exam!

Dammit, you beat me to it!

 

[The Squire of Gothos]

Anyone else having problems seeing the images? I can only see the Afro-sheen picture (great caption, great photoshopping!)

Strangest thing, I got Vodaphone to lift the content restriction on my mobile broadband (it keeps the under 18s from seeing anything terrible online) and the caption contest photos appear

 

[cooleddie74]

McCOY:"Don't worry.

If you need a pregnancy test kit, just swing by sickbay. I got a closetful of 'em."

Getting the Captain to take his nightly bath could be a struggle.

 

[cooleddie74]

McCOY:"Hey, you ever seen a genital rash that's colored like a cabbage?

Well, Miss Thang...thanks to me, you're soon GONNA."

 

[Balthier the Great]

Viva Viagra!

Ok Shatner, for the last time, those are gene's hookers.

But I ... Want ... Hookers!

 

[Nerys Myk]

MCCOY: You were right Jim, the shoulder seams are the uniforms' weakest link.

 

[M'Sharak]

Anyone else having problems seeing the images? I can only see the Afro-sheen picture (great caption, great photoshopping!)

Strangest thing, I got Vodaphone to lift the content restriction on my mobile broadband (it keeps the under 18s from seeing anything terrible online) and the caption contest photos appear

McCoy: "That can only mean one thing."
Barrows: "They're afraid of Shatmandu's dick jokes?"
McCoy: "Heh heh, that Shatmandu. He kills me."
[Both stroll on, laughing.]

"I was NOT... LOOKING... at the RABBIT!"
"Whatever you say, sir. Right this way."

 

[Outpost4]

Ok Shatner, for the last time, those are gene's hookers.

But I ... Want ... Hookers!

The back story on why his character went from JT Kirk to TJ Hooker.

 

[Ryan Thomas Riddle]

Kirk: I. Will. Not. Submit. To. My. Prostate exam!

Dammit, you beat me to it!

The fastest phaser wins!

 

[Shatmandu]

McCoy: "So, for some new tits whenever you want, you won't tell everyone I lost my boner and cried like a baby?"
Barrows: "Deal."

Mutiny Leader Sulu had gathered the crew on the hanger deck, along with rope, a taser, and four sticks of butter.

McCoy: "You're being a good sport."
Barrows: "Yeah."
McCoy: "What other yeoman would give that much uniform material to a superior officer who forgot his landing party toilet paper?"

When Sulu put in the wrong carousel of vacation pictures, Kirk was driven stark raving mad.

 

[Shatmandu]

McCoy: "You're a great lay, but I wish I hadn't lost my communicator ..."
Uhura, from Barrows' vagina, filtered: "Enterprise to Doctor McCoy, please respond ..."

 

[Samurai8472]

Kirk- DAMN YOU PEOPLE! THERE'S A CREATURE ON THE WING! WHY WON'T YOU LISTEN TO ME! AHHHH!!!"

 

[Rat Boy]

McCoy: "I finally got what 'the carpets matching the drapes' means!"

 

[Outpost4]

McCoy: That was an atomic wedgie you gave me, Miss Barrows.